Summer is going to be great for OLDaters and friends

[PinkIdentity]

The Rules:

1.The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.

1. Develop a thick skin.
2. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
3. It's all BS until it actually happens.
4. Trust your gut instinct.
5. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
6. Know your worth.
7. If it's not fun, stop.
8. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item

why yes, I have a copy right here, page 11 the catch up rule, wait a few weeks and say Hi 👋

Ok, may be j should be wary of using that then, though I'm not sure what the issue is.

In my experience, women use it with me as much as I use it with them, and it's a good conversation opener to talk about funny/weird/awful experiences we've had on OLD:

cadburyegg Re photos, I'd send a full length/sitting down one before the date if you are worried. I always worried about this so I put 2 full length ones on my profile as well as 2 selfies. I'm sure you look lovely though

I have to say on the first date kissing, I kissed all of my successful dates on the first meeting.

I've also always had a kiss on all first dates, although often just a peck. Current iron kissed me properly at the end of the first date and I knew then there was chemistry!

Hi everyone
I've been lurking for a while, waiting to take the plunge
Instigated divorce last year and trying to sell the house. Both still living in it as no choice.
I want to dip my toe in and see who's out there, but if a man said he was still in the same house as his ex, I'd run for the hills.
Still it's giving me time to work out what I want.
I'm mid-late 40s and wondering if I'll do better on an over 50s app.

Anyone got any recommendations?

I'm glad I'm not the only one who's into a kiss on the first date! Have to see if there's chemistry!

Thank you for the replies ☺️

I will definitely send him a full length picture.

I think we are going for food and drinks, although he has been a bit quiet messaging wise over the last couple of days. Trying to not think anything of it but we'll see if the date still happens...

spotsandflowers

you def don’t need a over 50 app
just try usual ones (hinge bumble tinder )
or for casual Feeld

id advise being very honest about your current status in the profile tbh

you’ll get less hit - but better ones as some people also in your situation

Well mine has ended before it begun. Turns out he wasn't being a twat last night, he was being his true self. Oh well

@NervesOfCotton oh no, what's happened?

qqq82 Short version, he stopped communicating. I asked him about it last night (when I said he'd been a bit of a twat yesterday) & he said no reason, would be back to normal today... Same today.

No reason, No excuses, he's just not talking & I'm not begging.

@NervesOfCotton he is really odd. I can’t get over this whole full on telling his daughter and then being twatish.

Are you okay?

LittleFloatingGhost Thank you, I'm feeling sad but it's silly isn't it, we didn't even know each other. First one after a big long break is a tough one I suppose.

He told his son the next night too, The whole thing was just weird really wasn't it. Last night I told him I was feeling upset & he apologized & said he still likes me, & then he goes & does the same all day today.

It's all game playing isn't it.

Anyway, onwards we go.

Can I join in? First time dating since my relationship ended in October.

Second date tomorrow. First date was just a coffee. No kisses. But I really liked her (lesbians). Chatting every day since. Tomorrow we meet to go to the beach and then out for dinner!

@NervesOfCotton it does seem like that, but he seems like a walking red flag. Good it happened now and not later on when you’re too invested.

It is definitely a head f*ck 🤗

LittleFloatingGhost Thank you lovely
Have you arranged another date with Mr Music?

Beachdaysandbbqs Sounds like it's going well so far

@NervesOfCotton sorry to hear this. I think him telling his kids seemed a red flag and that he was rushing things along by talking of houses near by. I think there is a tiny possibility that it's romantic but from my experience, those types of people just enjoy the initial buzz and want to reel you in with their intensity then back off and you're left wondering.

Good that you aren't chasing him

Welcome @Beachdaysandbbqs hope you have a fab date 2

@NervesOfCotton sorry to hear he turned out being a twat but at least you know early. Head up and on to better x

Sorry nervesofcotton ☹️.
My guy that I had a first date with last week has been quiet this week. He texted last night saying he’d had a busy few days and asked me about my plans for the weekend. I haven’t replied yet but I might ask him today if he fancies lunch or something next week? If he doesn’t reply to that then mine will also be over before it’s begun too.
I’m hoping he’ll want to see me, last weeks lunch was very nice, comfortable conversation, quite a few things on common etc and he seemed normal, not wierd ! Just a peck at the end, but it was only lunch. And he was lovely and paid for it all, even though I offered to split

Passmethpens

why would it be over !! He’s texted and said busy and what are weekend plans !
def try and meet him 😁

Thank you everybody, all lovely to read this morning
It was just weird wasn't it but at least we didn't have date 3 (or a snog!)

Passmethpens That sounds like a nice date, he does sound lovely, text him & see what happens today. Sending you luck

We had talked about texting & said that we both like a little bit of texting if it's gonna be a week at a time until we can see each other. I think you need to have that conversation don't you as some people are happy no contact & some want it all the time don't they.

NervesOfCotton

i know and I’m sure you feel sad 😞 but this one was red flag city

I didn’t say anything but the telling his kids , perma texting was a bit too much

be careful as if you don’t feed him he might be back for more and will try and charm you
then the weirdness starts again

Remember you don’t know him and the 🥰😍 is just our brains messing with us !

easy to say but I’d be deleting him and keeping a digital and silent distance

😂😂thank you!
see this is why I need all the help I can get…. Useless history in relationships (and marriages, and Fwb for that matter)

Beachdaysandbbqs

thats a hell of a second date !!! All dayer 😂

hope it goes lovely