Friend hit on my husband

[AleenaM]

Trying to enlarge my circle of friends with kids, met this particular one at some busy kids parties, then a few times with other families too, recently she came to mine with her kid. Husband says she gave him a clear flirty look when I wasn't around, he wasn't comfortable with this and avoided her thereafter. Never really had this issue pre-kids or after kids in 13-14years, he's never said someone tried to hit on him, amongst friends or groups of people who know we are in a relation. She's in a complicated relationship with her child's father. I'd probably describe me and husband as modest people and private about our relationship, no PDA ever either, just to give context to say that we would never flirt as banter.

How big of a red flag is this in my friendship with her? Husband suggests to just keep our meetings to parks/play places and have a more superficial friendship ( I have already stupidly overshared some things with her, to do with our children as I felt her as trustworthy and genuine).

Posters replying to dump the friend for… looking at OPs husband. Do you all keep your fellas hidden away? Just in case a woman looks at him? Must be scary for you all.

Maybe she did this look?

What is a flirty look?

I wouldn't bin the friendship for that.

You don't know if your husband misunderstood.

All men on this planet, even the really ugly ones (not saying your husband is ugly btw), think they are irresistible to women.

An innocent smile can be misunderstood as flirting.

I can’t fathom a situation where my husband said he’d got a flirty look off a mate and then proceeded to tell me his he’d hidden from her, and how I should manage my friendship.

He would have to wait till I stopped laughing and rolling my eyes and giving him mock flirty looks first though. What grown up reacts like this over a “flirty look”? What did he think she was going to do, drag him into the garden and ravish him? And why are you now saying she’s untrustworthy 🤪🤪🤪

Flirty look 😂

Really, a look??

Maybe…

He makes your DH feel uncomfortable and he has told you this, whether she flirts with everyone she meets or he misinterpreted her smile. Either way, given your DH isn’t prone to saying this sort of thing, why aren’t you giving him the benefit of doubt?

The one time the bend and snap won't have worked!

😂😂😂😂

The reality is likely that he's taken that the wrong way, a "clear flirty look" when you're out the room? Really? The poor woman probably glanced his way/made eye contact/smiled - a look isn't hitting on your husband and you're going to struggle to make friends if you over react this much.

I'd be more concerned about your husband suggesting you should half-drop a friend and make her more of a superficial acquaintance than a friend. Trying to isolate a partner is a red flag.

You don't know that she hit on your husband. You know only that he told you that she gave him a look he interpreted as flirty.

I wouldn't do anything about this. Carry on the friendship normally.

Of topic but when did MN start allowing GiFs? - they're ruining every bloody thread.

She's single, well she must be after your husband then 🙄

What constitutes a "flirty look" is quite subjective though isn't it? Maybe she had dust in her eye or something.

Anybody else thinking of when Rachel had a sore eye and Joey thought she was winking at him?

@AleenaM is this really over just a “flirty look” or is there more to it? As I really can’t understand the dilemma? What if your husband has misread her “look”? And even if it was a flirty look - so what?

OP just thinking of your comment that you don't do open PDAs with DH, is it possible he has just misconstrued a friendly look. I would get a flirty comment, whole body movement or touch, but outside the really OTT gifs given I can't imagine what a really flirty look would look like...

WTF is a flirty look?!

Sounds like your DH fancies her and can’t cope with her being around him.

Good grief. If a man speaks up he's guilty. If he kept it to himself, he's guilty. I think some people on here just hate men

Absolutely this. If your husband never comes out with things like this then I'd be inclined to believe him. She is making him feel uncomfortable for whatever reason. I'd like to think if the OP was feeling the same her husband would also believe her.

Is your husband jealous or threatened by you having friends?

Some of you really like drama and also don't trust your husbands at all. If you got an inappropriate look or feeling from a male friend or coworker would you like it if others would brush it off and say you're making it up, and Oh, don't flatter yourself ?

Having re read my post, I can see why you thought that, but he didn't tell me to end the friendship, I suggested that if it was what he says it was, then probably isn't the friend I'm looking for and I shouldn't meet her at all. He suggested I don't drop it completely but to maybe meet but at parks rather than at home; this was to do with some other matters to do with her parenting (on which we both agree) and not to do with whatever happened. It's me who'd be more wary of her as she's a new friend and I don't know her character, I'm in my mid 30s and don't want to get invested with complicated people.

I have and have had many other single or engaged friends, some which are flirty and jokey in general or do sexual banter, he's never said something like this. He doesn't think he's God's gift to women or think cashiers smiling means they fancy him. Specifically he said she looked at him in a way where he sensed something is not right, and having asked again it was when I was there too.

He has never told me what friends to keep or not lol I shouldn't have to explain this, the whole thing isn't that deep