Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

How do you split your bills if one earns much more than other

131 replies

Shookethtothecore · 23/02/2023 10:14

Just that really. How do you split your earnings. So bills and everything and allocate what’s left over. Especially if one of you far out earns the other.
thanks

OP posts:
OnSilverStars · 23/02/2023 10:26

All our money goes in one account and the bills come out. What's left is for both of us. We don't have separate money

Choconut · 23/02/2023 10:34

All money is shared, we have a joint account and everything comes out of there. If we want or need something we discuss it and then get it.

bted · 23/02/2023 10:37

I think the best way is to put both earnings into one account, and then agree what happens with the rest. If you both spend most of your time together doing the same things, then its best with one account, if you like to do things seperately, then a fair allowance each of the rest of the money to do as you choose. This allows you both to spend the money as you see fit, and neither should judge the other on what they spend the money on.

I personally believe in the concept of one earning much more than the other and therefore having more money, once married I believe you're in it together, and therefore the money is part of that togetherness. It does rely of course on both parties being fair (so one cánt refuse to work for example).

hope this helps

Aposterhasnoname · 23/02/2023 10:43

Two joint accounts, one for bills. On payday the money is transferred across for the bills and we decide between us how much to transfer to savings. We can then both spend from what’s left as we see fit. We usually discuss bigger purchases but there’s no set amount. And if we can afford it, we usually buy it. Luckily we both have the same attitude to money.

Aprilx · 23/02/2023 10:44

We don’t split our earnings or our bills. We do the opposite, we share everything because we are married.

WorkingFromHomeRocks · 23/02/2023 10:48

50/50. All our money goes into the joint account and the bills come straight out. I find all this % splitting of bills unbelievably weird in relationships. It’s so transactional with someone you supposedly love 🙄 🙄

Dacadactyl · 23/02/2023 10:50

We are the same. Everything is shared even though my husband earns a lot more than me.

I wouldn't want all this splitting the bill shenanigans, seems cold to me.

Fellsidefeather · 23/02/2023 10:51

Like pp above. All money goes into joint account. We then had standing order set up for the same amount to go into two personal accounts. That’s our individual spending money. The rest is joint spending and joint savings. Did that when I earned more, when we earned similar and now he earns more as I’m part time to be home more for the kids.

Stickortwister · 23/02/2023 10:54

Joint account. Money goes in bills come out. We discuss any expensive purchases. Thats it really. Some months i spend more.... other months he does.

Currently i earn approx x8 of dhs wage. Theres been times in the past where my income was 0 and his was the only wage that came in. We're a team though and have been doing our finances like this for 20 years.

DappledThings · 23/02/2023 10:55

We don't either. Everything goes in and out of the joint account.

SpringofJoy · 23/02/2023 10:56

It's just one pot, ever since we moved in together.

TallulahBetty · 23/02/2023 10:58

We don't - everything goes into and out of one pot. We are a partnership. What's mine is his and vice versa. And yes I am the higher earner, by 50%.

slytherinabout · 23/02/2023 11:00

We each get paid into our own accounts and transfer everything minus £100 into a joint account. Everything comes out of the joint account apart from our own hobbies (although some exceptions). Any money left over at the end of the month (hahaha atm) goes into holiday savings.

Successgirl2022 · 23/02/2023 11:01

I pay for all the food, all my clothes & shoes, and 50% of our son's needs.

My DH pays for the rest as he earns 2-2.5 times more than me at the moment while I am building my better career.

ELL2478 · 23/02/2023 11:16

We have never had a joint account. I don't have access to what he earns and vice versa. My DH earns over double what I do as he has a better career being a lot older than me and iv had to stop work to have kids. I work part time now and pay half the mortgage and clothes etc for kids and childcare fees.

DrMarciaFieldstone · 23/02/2023 11:17

All earnings in the joint account and all bills paid from there. Simple.

SingingSands · 23/02/2023 11:20

We put everything in one account and use it for everything and anything.

We each have separate savings accounts.

ChristmasJumpers · 23/02/2023 11:24

We earn similarly but have been through times where one is studying or earning less for various reasons. All money goes into a joint account for bills. We then have a set amount of "spending money" for our own accounts. We get the same amount no matter who earns more. When our spending money is gone, its gone and sometimes we put it up/down depending on our earnings and circumstances

skippy67 · 23/02/2023 11:24

We've never had a joint account.
DH pays more bills than I do because he earns more.
We have a "house account" that we both pay in to, which is for, well, house stuff. That account is in my name only though, which DH is fine with. We've been together 31 years, married for 20, and we've never argued about money.

Patchworksack · 23/02/2023 11:24

Are you married? Do you have or plan to have children together?
We have always put both incomes into our joint account which pays all family bills. We get equal money into individual accounts to spend or save. This system has served us well through at times one of us being made redundant, maternity leave, my reduced hours. We have three children and I’m the one who works part time and does majority of childcare. I have a good professional job but undoubtedly have stagnated within my career because of having a family whilst DH has continued to progress. Make sure it is ironed out in a way that acknowledges that likelihood well before you get pregnant.

ChristmasJumpers · 23/02/2023 11:26

SingingSands · 23/02/2023 11:20

We put everything in one account and use it for everything and anything.

We each have separate savings accounts.

Can I ask, how do you decide how much to put into your savings accounts if all of your money is paid into one joint account and all of your spending is done from that account too?

TeenagersAngst · 23/02/2023 11:27

People often say 'we're a partnership, why would you do anything different'? That's fine, in principle, but there are often situations where it's more complicated.

We have a different arrangement to most on MN but that's for a couple of reasons: we were older when we met (mid 30s) and already financially established with properties. DH isn't employed and has multiple investments so there's no clear salary coming in, it changes monthly and he can take money out of the business as he needs.

We have a joint account and pay a set amount in monthly to cover household bills but everything else is separate. Total transparency though - I know exactly what money he has and he'll tell me at any time if I have a question on an aspect of his finances.

The amounts we pay into the joint account are different to reflect our individual 'wealth'. But DH also pays for lots of things ad hoc e.g. holidays, he bought me a car, so I never feel like I'm poorer than him. He's also not profligate and doesn't flash the cash on himself.

Values are the main concern for me rather than specific percentages of money and how it's shared out. You can both be earning the same amount but have very different attitudes to money which can cause problems.

mybunniesandme · 23/02/2023 11:27

So much depends on things we don't know and just because some posters on MN do it one way doesn't mean it's right for you and your relationship/family

FWIW I earnt a lot more than my ex husband. We split the mortgage and house costs 50/50 then i covered things like huge childcare bills and holidays and house repairs. I had more spending money because quite frankly I've earnt it in a very challenging high pressured career for which he can claim no input - I absolutely could still have got where I am without him.....him on the other hand has never had or wanted a career as such and no ambition to further himself or maximise his earnings. If he wanted more spending money than he should go out and work for it like I have.

Sunnydayz · 23/02/2023 11:32

All money put together, bills paid.
The rest is split equally between the two of us to spend/save as we like.
We have separate savings.
Each contribute equally for things like holidays.
I usually earn more than my partner but atm he brings in more as I’m on maternity leave. Once I go back to work, I’ll be working part time and probably be earning around the same as my partner.

WhatHaveIDone21 · 23/02/2023 11:33

We pay a certain percentage. So I earn 60% of the total household income so I pay 60% of the bills. We don't have a joint account. DH transfers his share to me each month.