How do you split your bills if one earns much more than other

[Shookethtothecore]

Just that really. How do you split your earnings. So bills and everything and allocate what’s left over. Especially if one of you far out earns the other.
thanks

We calculated our joint outgoings (mortgage, utilities, money for daughter at uni etc).
DH earns more than me.
We then calculated what percentage we would each contribute based on our take home wage. He pays in 65% and I pay in 35% of our shared bills each month.
it works incredibly well for us.
Any unexpected bills, holidays etc we pay the same percentage each.

DH earns many multiples of my earnings. All money goes into one account and we have equal access.

I actually spend much more than he does on “personal” stuff (haircuts, cosmetics etc) and fuel to get to work (he predominantly WFH).

All savings are solely in my name for tax reasons (I’m a non taxpayer, he’s a higher rate taxpayer).

We each pay into out joint account on the basis of our earnings and pay bills from that account

If you’re working part-time because of your children, maybe work out what the cost of what childcare would be if you worked full time hours, if your do most of the housework, the cost of paying a cleaner for this work, divide the total into two and present it to your DH and ask for payment for his share.

All money goes into one pot and is family money. Out of that we pay for everything.
(I say one pot, obviously we have various bank accounts, some in joint names, some like ISAs in individual names, but we consider it all to be joint money)

We do not have our own spending allowance.
We both have a similar attitude towards money, and so we just spend as we wish from the joint pot because we both know incomings and outgoings.

We don't question each other about occasional coffees, beers, nights out, clothes, or purchases such as books.
If we are planning something big but individual, such as a hen night or mates holiday we discuss it like grown ups and see if we can afford it. (And sometimes that may depend on who has done what recently).

Our way wouldn't work if we thought differently about money, eg one a big spender and one extremely frugal.
It also wouldn't work if one of us was oblivious to family needs (eg that £400 in the account in June is not holiday spending, it school uniform buying money.)

Not married but we each do 50% of take home into joint acct for joint costs.

If we were married with kids I expect we'd combine completely

We formed a family when we got married. We work as a team and pool our resources. There is no my money and their money. My bills and their bills. Only our money and our bills. That IS the point of the marriage contract. That IS why we formed a union. We trust eachother. It really is that simple.

Percentage. But one party cannot fund another for eternity unless you both agree it and are happy.

A plan to bring incomes roughly equal would be preferable.

Doesn't work like that for me.

Are you married?
So if your partner earns less than you, and you love them, and you choose to walk through life together, you are happy that they have less disposable income than you because.. why? Because they are not earning as much as you? Because they are not as valuable a person as you are? I don't get it.

Everything goes in one pot. He earns 3 x what I do and I’m shortly going on maternity leave.

We aren’t married but plan to.

Same

So DH has more disposable income than you because...?
He works harder than you do?
He's more valuable a person to society?
He deserves more in the marriage than you do?
Help me with the logic of why two people have different worths just becasue one has a higher paycheck than the other.
Why not share what you have with one another?

We both earn roughly the same, so each month we transfer the same amount in to a joint account for bills and joint savings. Everything else we keep in our own accounts to spend as we please.

In my last relationship I was the giver earner, making about 3 times what he did, so I paid 75% of the outgoings. I also spent more of my disposable income on fun stuff as he didn’t have much money left after his quarter of the hills. I would recommend in that situation doing what many others have done, which is pool all your money together but in our case he couldn’t be trusted financially not to just spend so we set it up as we did.

Congradulations!🎈

@SimplySeb my ex husband once wrote down that I owed him 20p. I’d been married 3 days and he was deadly serious. I’ve been on both sides of this 😜

He thinks he's more important than you and that what you've done with the kids is meaningless.

I'd divorce him.

I don't have a joint account, despite being married and me and DH earn different amounts. We figured out what percentage more he earns than me and he pays that amount and I pay a lower proportion. House work etc is (in theory) split evenly but in practise not so much...

We pay into a joint account proportionately according to income. Everything that's left over is ours to use for any personal expenses. I've never been keen on the idea of one pot as I like having my own money and my own accounts. At various points, dh or I have earned more than the other, which means we technically have more personal spending money left over after joint expenses, but I'm fine with that. Neither of us would begrudge the other money and we move money around between us if one of us needs more in a given month or needs to cover an extra joint expense.

You both put all your earnings into a joint account. All bills, food, childcare costs, fuel etc comes out of the joint account. You can then look at what's left over and come to a fair arrangement when it comes to savings and pensions. Not fair, for instance, if one can pay hundreds into their pension or savings every month, but the other can only afford peanuts, especially if their lower earnings are due to having to work around looking after dc.

The general wisdom on mumsnet is that if the man earns more he should be sufficient to ensure that both have the exact same left over to spend.

If the woman earns more, all bills are split 50/50 regardless.

One account all in, all out, talk about big purchases and buy what we want. We have talked briefly about splitting but never got passed how you do that fairly, and I guess we aren't that bothered so it never happened.

We split 50/50 but earn a hugely different salary. It doesnt leave me in any hardship but still boils my piss

so you say hes on a 6 figure salary. Lets say that 6 figures is £100,000 a year, that means after deductions of tax/ni, he has £5,500 a month. Lets say £2k of that is household bills. £500 in pension, Thats £3k left. And he gives you £300 a month / now you earn £300 a month (that he now doesnt give you) that covers shopping/kids clothes. Is this financial abuse? Are your National Insurance payments being met for your state pension (at the least), what about your own pension??