DH farting problem ruining relationship

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So basically what it says on the tin. Married 4 years, everythings fine, really cant conplain at all except for the farting issue. And yes he's had all sorts of tests, diet changes, nothing helps 😣 he's massively self conscious of it, smell is putrid to the point of making me feel sick, and so embarrassing when visiting parents or with friends, I cant seem to get the stench out of the house.
Just to be clear he doesnt eat junk food as im not a fan, we eat healthy, weirdly it seems the more nervous he gets about his flatulence the worse it gets. The weekend was the last straw, I had to sleep downstairs as the smell in our room was disgusting.
He's had a colonoscopy, showed nothing, stool samples etc, theyre saying ibs as he's other wise healthy apart from the putrid farting which is ruining everything.

im willing to alter his diet

Right. Says it all.

However, im not convinced people know this much about how their other half poos and farts.

and im willing to alter his diet and make a plan for him to follow he's not a puppy

I don't want to worry you but I think both of you should push the doctor for more tests and referrals. My friend had an issue with their bowel movements for a long time, so much so they couldn't go to work anymore or barely leave the house. They had so many dietary tests and checks and were told everything was fine. He changed his diet and did the FODMAP thing but it made no difference. Eventually the specialists found a slow growing tumour on his bowel, which has now been removed thankfully, but it never would have been found had he and his wife not pushed for more tests.

And i resent the idea that im uncaring, I've pushed for every single test as if it was up to him he'd suffer in silence, when we were getting fobbed off by doctors i insisted on the tests, and was told its ibs, and im willing to alter his diet and make a plan for him to follow,

Just to be clear, when you were talking about 'foodmaps' in your posts, had you not heard of FODMAP?

I don't think OP has a clue about FODMAPs tbh @NatalieIsFreezing as she had shown herself to be pretty ignorant about gut conditions thus far.

@jamoncrumpets I don't think she's interested in trying anything different food-wise. She's denied the need all the way along- apart from the toast, rice cakes and nuts she randomly chose once because she of course knows better than the evidence-based protocols.

But so does soy protein

OP you are just avoiding the fact that the foul smelling farts only became a problem after his diet changed. Something in his current diet is not working for his gut.

weirdly it seems the more nervous he gets about his flatulence the worse it gets.

This reminds me of a chap where I used to work years ago.

He seemed to have a problem with his digestive system.

Every time he was getting ready for a meeting with Senior Management he got really anxious and had to rush to the lavvy. Once in there he had some kind of explosive diarrhoea that we could all hear in several rooms down the corridor.
It was so stinky that the male members of staff couldn't use the lavvy for hours afterwards.
(Fortunately we ladies had our own facilities)

So maybe OP is barking up the wrong tree and her poor DH needs treating for anxiety, not IBS ? 🤔

So maybe OP is barking up the wrong tree and her poor DH needs treating for anxiety, not IBS ?

Anxiety can exacerbate IBS. I feel really sorry for this bloke.

Yes, op, as we have all said multiple times, he had bad bowels and wind before because he obviously has a sensitive bowel/IBS and was eating pure shit. Meat and animal products however are nutritious and offer a wider variety of a healthy balanced diet for someone who clearly cannot tolerate all the hgh fibre vegan friendly foods he is currently eating... given your admission his bowels are now far worse.

Also to the commenter 'its just a bit of wind'. Wow you must have magic glasses to see inside his bowels, and a medical degree to interpret the long term damage he is doing to his insides. Let's also hope he never needs aggressive medications that could leave his bowel in shreds and ulcerated, with a stoma to boot.

(Not to mention the impending divorce obviously, the social self isolation and wrecked mental health) ^

My suspicion would be he might be farting on purpose in front of people to get a reaction 🤔 lots of men seem to think it's funny to cause maximum smell, disgusting as it is. My son used to crank them out and think it was hilarious, and the more I protested the funnier he thought he was! Dirty gits some men.

My DHs farts were caused by artificial sweeteners, mostly the ones you put in coffee, but others in sweets etc have the same effect.

Can’t say I’ve ever been able to fart on demand?

I suggest you Google Mr Methane from Britain's Got Talent. In fact please don't 💩

A vegan diet is not ideal for a human - ovolactovegetarian is fine.

A human appendix is about as long as your little finger - contains bacteria to help break down fibre.

A rabbit has an appendix a foot long & still has to eats its poos again to get out all of the nutrients.

Give the poor man's guts a break, please!

I know plenty of men who fart on demand and think its hilarious to stink up the gaff with a nasty toot, to believe otherwise is very naive. I would tell him to fart in the bathroom if he needs to, otherwise it's just plain rude to expect OP to breathe in her husbands fart odour 24/7

You know some really gross men @Snowwhitehair

Of all the men you know, 'plenty' of them are like that? Bloody hell, that's grim!

How recently did he go vegan? When my husband went vegan his wind suddenly became absolutely catastrophic, I was close to begging him to pack the vegan diet in because I couldn't stand it. Eventually his body adapted, but it was a dark few months.

I'm not saying all men, but it's mainly men who seem to enjoy doing the rankest farts they can possibly conjure and causing maximum discomfort. I'm not saying OP husband is doing it deliberately but its worth considering that he's trying to get under OP skin and it seems its working!

He's been vegan for nearly 2 years, but very gassy before on an animal produce diet too. He lived alone and would live off fast food for years so doubt that would have helped 😣

He's definitely not farting to wind me up, he gets genuinely embarrassed about it. If it was up to him he wouldn't have tried to sort it out, i had to push him to get the tests etc done, it just got to the point where i couldn't cope with the stench any more

@Snowwhitehair

I'm not saying all men, but it's mainly men who seem to enjoy doing the rankest farts they can possibly conjure and causing maximum discomfort.

Not all men, but you still said you know 'plenty' of men like that. You need to meet some nicer blokes!

I'm not saying OP husband is doing it deliberately but its worth considering that he's trying to get under OP skin and it seems its working!

It sounds more like he is feeling really depressed and humiliated about it. Ashamed and anxious, not sure where you're even vaguely getting that he could be trying to get under her skin by doing it on purpose?

She even says: "He is very self conscious and he worries that when we're out socially that people are put off, if he tries to hold it in he gets bad gas pain." I feel really sorry for him.

Does he suffer with pain ?

I know you've sent him for tests but gastro problems don't usually get resoved within a few years, the tests you have had done have come back nagative.

I would suggest keep on searching for answers and requesting further tests.
You have to be open to changing his diet going forwards.