DH farting problem ruining relationship

[Tiptopsshape]

So basically what it says on the tin. Married 4 years, everythings fine, really cant conplain at all except for the farting issue. And yes he's had all sorts of tests, diet changes, nothing helps 😣 he's massively self conscious of it, smell is putrid to the point of making me feel sick, and so embarrassing when visiting parents or with friends, I cant seem to get the stench out of the house.
Just to be clear he doesnt eat junk food as im not a fan, we eat healthy, weirdly it seems the more nervous he gets about his flatulence the worse it gets. The weekend was the last straw, I had to sleep downstairs as the smell in our room was disgusting.
He's had a colonoscopy, showed nothing, stool samples etc, theyre saying ibs as he's other wise healthy apart from the putrid farting which is ruining everything.

So how do you explain OPs own assertion that it wasn't this toxic smelling before?

Rotting carcases? Have you actually smelt rotting cabbages?

How about get over it and just forget about the fart at the dinner table and move on, and then look at a process of elimination. There's obviously something in his regular diet that is the cause. Soya products can be quite bad for rotten smelling farts. It may not be the entire diet but a part of it that is the problem. You said yourself it wasn't this toxic smelling beforehand. Even if you didn't live together then you'd still have known about it if he stank that badly then. It is probably something really simple. What regular protein is he eating? Protein farts are usually the most offensive.

Its definitely a head scratcher for sure. Wasn't too bad before he went vegan, very bad after he went vegan.

Just don't know what it could be! Total mystery.

Poor man! This has been me at various times, most of which I have thankfully lived alone! My digestive system is temperamental. His digestive system IS in distress, for whatever reason. My consultant advised to go low residue, low FODMAP, low gluten, basically eat easily digestible foods for a few weeks to ease the work of the gut. I’m omnivore so included steamed white fish & chicken. Take probiotics. Clearly the diet does not suit him. I love pulses, but my body does not. It is what it is. You need to work with his body, not against it.

I know right.... It's quite obvious he is sneaking meat into his diet somewhere.... Now where could he be hiding the wrappers.... 🤔

Someone said all the vegans they know have issues with farting. I've been vegan for nearly 9 years and I don't :/ I might toot a bit while running but I did that before veganism too 😂

I don't see how that can be obvious at all? Vegetable protein stinks too. Brussels sprouts for a start cause rancid farts in just about anyone

Some people are allergic to soya, (and suffer bloating and IBS symptoms) which cuts down your options for a lot of prepared vegan food.

@Ladyintangerine Yesterday I had bean curry for breakfast and lentil curry for tea. Not processed at all, but I was definitely feeling it.

Seriously, see a good nutritionist about this. They will help with added digestive enzymes etc. Your DH is eating things that don't suit his system and he needs help to navigate the problem. You can't be in charge of this situation as you're not an expert.

My partner used to be the same. He cut out red meat and his farts are no longer offensive.

I was being sarcastic... As was the poster I quoted...

OP - why do you think he is farting so offensively?

Do you make a connection between what he is eating and what his guts are like? At all?

Its not that simplistic as before he went vegan (under my evil influence no doubt 😞) he used to have explosive bowel movements which i noticed when he would stay at mine, i put it down to his crappy diet of fast food which he seemed to live off. I dont remember his farts smelling so toxic though, they literally smell like rotten garbage, but maybe he was better at hiding it back then, he used to smoke so would go outside for a cig a lot, for all i know he could have been letting one off, and hiding it, so its possible its not the diet and more an ibs situation like the doctor told us as his colonoscopy was fine.

There is a middle ground between a diet of junk food and being vegan though. He doesn't even have to eat meat, but some Greek yoghurt could work wonders, while contributing minimally to the meat/dairy industry.

It also depends on what you do eat, a vegan diet could be v high fibre, it could be carb heavy or it could have a lot of quorn type pretend meat. Depending on that, you could shuffle about, looking at pulses, gluten and mushrooms respectively.

A food and farting diary is a good place to start, try to spot patterns.

FODMAP stands for fermentable oligosaccharides, disaccharides, monosaccharides and polyols, which are short-chain carbohydrates (sugars) present in varying amounts in most foods. It is understood that the small intestine absorbs these sugars poorly. In some people, it doesn’t cause an issue. In others (like IBS riddled me - and possibly your DH) it causes a whole host of issues.

Research FODMAP (not foodmap!!!), FODMAP elimination diets, and keep a journal. I have vegan cookbooks but I can’t eat most of the recipes because they are filled with things that are high in FODMAP sugars which react to my bowels. Things like pulses, beans, cabbages, alliums. Even apricots. These are death on a plate for me! Look for foods and food groups which are LOW in FODMAP sugars and stick to those initially.

Everyone is different - I can tolerate certain high FODMAP foods but not others. That’s the point of the elimination diet - to figure out what your DH specifically reacts to.

And take it SLOWLY - don’t rush reintroducing food groups. It sounds like his gut needs some time to heal with foods it can tolerate before adding in foods he may or may not struggle to digest again.

It’s a slog - I know that very well - but over the years it can and will get better if you are consistent and analytical with it.

Its not that simplistic as before he went vegan (under my evil influence no doubt 😞) he used to have explosive bowel movements which i noticed when he would stay at mine, i put it down to his crappy diet of fast food which he seemed to live off. I dont remember his farts smelling so toxic though, they literally smell like rotten garbage, but maybe he was better at hiding it back then, he used to smoke so would go outside for a cig a lot, for all i know he could have been letting one off, and hiding it, so its possible its not the diet and more an ibs situation like the doctor told us as his colonoscopy was fine.

It's not an either/or OP, you seem to be kind of in denial. He could've already had a somewhat delicate constitution and it's not rare for that to be exacerbated by certain foods.

Ps my DH recently developed IBS after a terrible stomach bug and he now has occasional awful flare ups of abdominal pain and diarrhoea. We eat the same (no dairy, limited meat, no processed food (other than some choc - we all need a treat!) lots of veg) and when he’s poorly, I’m fine. It’s not just junk food that causes bowel issues - it’s much more individual than that. We are now working on figuring out what his new triggers are!

When he would stay at yours and... eat vegan food?

IBS doesn't appear from nowhere. It has triggers. Vegan diet is the trigger.

@Tiptopsshape if you had a child who had this problem, what would you do? Would you look at diet and be open to the possibility of a non-vegan diet if it was better for their health and well being? I understand your morals, but it isn't always as black and white as you might think. Diet and what works for one person doesn't work for another. Saying x diet is 'on average' healthier, doesn't mean it is healthier for everyone.

If (non human) animals should be counted as most important from a moral standpoint, no matter what, then the world would be better off without the lot of us.

Word of warning too. I had IBS in my twenties and thirties. In my forties I have IBD, as a result of the prolonged IBS.

If he doesn't work to get this under control he will be where I am. On medication for life.

Get him to try a very bland diet of white carbs, protein from chicken and fish and a bit of dairy such as yogurt. Greek is best because it's lower GI.

Give that a week.

Sounds like GP have investigated source and nothing is obvious but I would push for gastroenterology referral as he could try binding medication, given to sufferers of Bile Acid Malabsorption. They may be the magic bullet he needs. They have changed my life. If I ate a vegan diet with pulses, soy, nuts and seeds replacing my protein sources I would still be incredibly unwell. Even on the binders.

Your diet isn't easily absorbed by a lot of people. It's not a conspiracy, just a sad fact unfortunately.

I am keeping reading this thread just to see how far it can travel down the river in Egypt.

@deeperthanallroses 😂

I dont remember his farts smelling so toxic though, they literally smell like rotten garbage, but maybe he was better at hiding it back then

Or maybe he already had some issues that cause explosive bowel movements and they've been exacerbated by his change in diet.

It's not offensive to veganism to say that for some people, not all but some, it's a diet that doesn't suit them physically. It's a fact. People can or course continue to be vegan if their moral code means they won't ever consider doing otherwise. But that doesn't change the fact that it doesn't physically suit everyone.

Why are you personally offended by someone stating a literal fact: A vegan diet can cause gut issues and increased, foul smelling flatulence in some people.

The same is true of dairy for some people, onions for some people...

Just to clarify when he was at mine this was early on in the relationship and he wasn't on a vegan diet then but still had loud explosive bowel movements, so assumed it was his kebab/indian takeaway preferences, from what i can recall anyway. Or maybe it was the energy drinks he was addicted to. Both of which ive weaned him off successfully.

If it was a child of course I'd explore every option so that they'd feel better, like i have done with DH. Its been me pushing for all these tests! Making doctors appointments for DH etc.

I've suggested he go on a rice and toast diet for now to see if theres any changes, and nuts for some protein, so will see if that helps.