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Original poster

Dating a gorgeous man

257 replies

Dateshate · 12/11/2022 10:13

I’m going on a date with a very, very good looking man. Met him on Bumble. I am not a shallow person and understand that looks are certainly not everything - looks are fleeting. I’m interested in the connection. He seems very keen and has said how he thinks I’m so good looking and lovely, that he will be shy around me - and sorry if he is! He seems genuine and nice. He’s talked about how connection is more important than looks and yes people do comment on how he looks but he doesn’t take it seriously and it doesn’t matter.

Thing is - he is really that good looking! And I’m nervous. I’ve put on weight lately and I don’t feel very good. I’m already convinced he won’t fancy me. And I’ve had a horrible time on online dating lately.

Any words of wisdom?

OP posts:
strangeflowers · 13/11/2022 21:10

let no one say that being good looking makes dating easy!

When I was younger, this was me. Many of the guys I dated didn't trust me and told me I would leave them for someone better, due to my appearance. My LTR was a horror for this, his mother early on told him 'she will hurt you' and he never got over that. All based on my looks.

I eventually quit sex altogether, not shit. I have close friends and some family left now, but am still so damaged by those presumptions that I have come to not trust it. Several times in my life I have been in relationships where the guy (even good looking themselves) suspected me of infidelity because 'other men noticed me too much'.

We live in a problematic world, and I was not even beautiful in my opinion, just cute. I am much older now, so one might say it won't factor, but the damage - is done.

AuntyMabelandPippin · 13/11/2022 21:10

Keeping everything crossed OP.

Carouselfish · 13/11/2022 21:31

Nice update OP, though my serial killer bells would be ringing....semi joking! Too good to be true usually is. Just go slowly!

Tessabelle74 · 13/11/2022 21:42

That's great @Dateshate long may it continue!

letitcomedown · 13/11/2022 21:46

Eye of the beholder and all that - both ways. I'm a guy and think I'm somewhere between slightly ugly and average, but when I was younger a fair number of women (and men!) genuinely seemed to think I was some kind of big catch, especially when I wore posh or fashionable clothes.

Original poster
Dateshate · 13/11/2022 21:56

I know Carouselfish he’s so unbelievably nice I can’t believe it. And it’s making me so sad I just can’t enjoy it. But that’s the way it is sadly.

OP posts:
Original poster
Dateshate · 13/11/2022 21:56

Thanks for all the lovely comments ♥️

OP posts:
Mimi1313 · 13/11/2022 22:03

I agree... Very good looking men rarely punch below their weight. BUT a humble or super overly confident good looking man does and you would be surprised! My DH is so humble and down to earth but super good looking! I never expected him to find me attractive but he really believes he is punching above his weight and I'm happy with that!

Also you haven't seen/met him yet so have low expectations as he may not be the picture you are painting.

Lysianthus · 13/11/2022 22:30

Mimi1313 · 13/11/2022 22:03

I agree... Very good looking men rarely punch below their weight. BUT a humble or super overly confident good looking man does and you would be surprised! My DH is so humble and down to earth but super good looking! I never expected him to find me attractive but he really believes he is punching above his weight and I'm happy with that!

Also you haven't seen/met him yet so have low expectations as he may not be the picture you are painting.

Have you read the thread?! OP has now met him twice...

Mimi1313 · 13/11/2022 23:26

Lysianthus · 13/11/2022 22:30

Have you read the thread?! OP has now met him twice...

Show quote history

Ahh well in that case just ignore that sentence!

Melonapplepear · 14/11/2022 01:01

Smearywindowsagain · 12/11/2022 13:11

I never used bumble when I was single. Bumble is for lazy men that want women to chase them. Easy lays for him. What you look like for that purpose will be only vaguely important

Alternatively, some women like it because we mes

Melonapplepear · 14/11/2022 01:03

Pressed send too soon. As we can control the influx of messages and not be swamped. Nothing to do when an 'easy lay' ,🤣

FootfallFootball · 14/11/2022 05:27

Go very slowly, OP, just like you would with anyone. There are multiple dimensions to him.

xfan · 14/11/2022 08:48

Most relationships fail, including the ones with 'beautiful' people.

Igglepiggleslittletoe · 14/11/2022 09:01

Been reading and so happy for you OP :)

Hopalongweddingguest · 14/11/2022 09:07

Met my husband OLD. Was absolutely gobsmacked when the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen appeared. He was attractive in his photos but in real life he is magnificent as well as just the loveliest most gentle man.
I nearly had to be sedated to go I was so nervous but I’m forever glad I did.

Hopalongweddingguest · 14/11/2022 09:10

Dateshate · 13/11/2022 20:55

We had our first date and met up again today. He’s so unbelievably nice, calm, and genuine seeming. Usually I feel nervous on dates but he had such a good nature. I felt so relaxed around him. He looks just like his photos.

He said he knows it’s very early stages, but he feels like he could really be with me, and he wants to date slowly and seriously, and see where this can go. He said I’m stunning, even better looking than my photos, and I seem to have many of the qualities he is looking for - fun, kind, values etc. He said he’s looking to settle down, he wants a strong emotional connection with his partner.

We kissed and held hands.

He seems too good to be true 🤷‍♀️

I managed to miss part of the thread, apologies.

Delighted to hear your two dates have gone so well.

CambsAlways · 14/11/2022 09:26

I think you are putting yourself down, my husband is very good looking has a great personality too, everyone that meets him thinks how lovely he is, you might not have been to the gym but what does it matter, he wants to meet you just go along and have this date and stop worrying! I do think though if he’s that good looking I question why he needs a dating site,

CambsAlways · 14/11/2022 09:27

Just seen the update, happy for you op

Original poster
Dateshate · 14/11/2022 09:46

He’s impossibly lovely - so unbelievably nice. First guy I’ve met in over 10 years who I feel so comfortable around. He’s saying all the right things. It’s almost too good to be true. So it probably is!

OP posts:
ItStartedWithaKiss72 · 14/11/2022 12:26

Fingers crossed for you! He sounds great!

TabithaTittlemouse · 14/11/2022 12:33

Dateshate · 14/11/2022 09:46

He’s impossibly lovely - so unbelievably nice. First guy I’ve met in over 10 years who I feel so comfortable around. He’s saying all the right things. It’s almost too good to be true. So it probably is!

Even if it does turn out that it’s too good to be true, make the most of it while it lasts. Don’t keep searching for bad attributes!

Musti · 14/11/2022 12:33

Looks are subjective. He seems to find you as attractive as you find him, both inside and out. Sounds great :)

Daisytigermay · 15/11/2022 00:29

This is so wonderful he obviously thinks you are lovely enjoy it this is making me think I should give bumble another try. I hope you keep the thread updated.

SteveHarringtonsChestHair · 15/11/2022 00:49

Wow that all sounds really promising! Go you Smile

Inspired me to keep on Bumbling!