Inheritance to new girlfriend over DD

[Citycentre3]

I just can't get over that a man who suddenly becomes in a position to buy a property instead of renting, due to a family inheritance would priortise a new girlfriend that he has known for around a month instead of his own young daughter.

This is exactly what my brother in law has done. Surely it is his duty as a father to provide a home for his child and not some latest piece he has met off Tinder

He split up from the mother of his child a few months previous. They both lived in a rented property, so he moved out and rented somewhere else to live on his own.

His own family home was sold due to inheritance reasons, and the money was split between 3 siblings. Surely any sane normal man would see this as an opportunity to give his child some stability?

his ex partner now lives in a rough council estate with a new partner and his dd, who he sees twice a month.

This woman that he had known literally for 5 weeks, got to decide where the house should be and what kind of property she wanted.

Just to be clear she never contributed to the deposit on the house and my brother in law pays the mortgage, but her name is on the title deeds.

Tell me people, are these now the normal actions of a decent loving father in 2022?

I really don't understand what you are so outraged about.
He has bought a (presumably nice, safe) house that his daughter will stay in when she comes to visit. You don't mention problems with maintenance. What other provision do think he should have made?
His personal relationship and financial arrangements within that are nothing to do with you unless your niece is suffering or being neglected. I don't understand how you feel that a partner having a contribution to decision-making or furnishing a house will put his daughter at a disadvantage.
Hopefully any inheritance issues will be a long time away but you cannot, as far as I am aware, disinherit a child in Scotland.

Depends how it is brought. We have no idea of what they have agreed and signed legally.

Also if the gf is contributing to the mortgage ensuring the BIL has a house in a better area, then it is right she is on the deeds.

I very much doubt she is on the deeds. I imagine she had to sign a disclaimer so in the event of him not paying his mortgage, the lender could obtain possession. Anyone who lives in the house should sign this acknowledgement. She is probably confused about what she has signed!

He bought a house.
That's absolutely fine.
There is a home for his daughter to go to.

Hey, maybe his daughter should live with him in the house that he's bought. That would ensure the stability for her, right?

Is your point that he should live alone and not have a partner? His ex has a partner. Should she throw him out?

Should he have bought his ex and her new partner a house instead?

Or is it that he should not have had any input from his girlfriend re location of the house?

He's a fucking idiot if he's known her five weeks, she's contributed nothing and he's put her on the deeds.

If it's providing for his child then that's monthly child support. Does he pay that?

Meant to say that I think what you really feel but are trying to avoid saying is that he should have given his inheritance or part of it to his ex and by extension her new partner and you don't want to say it because you know you'll be told that's ridiculous.

Did he buy it outright or is she also needed for the mortgage?

his ex lives with another man, not sure what you expect

Both parents sound awful. Both living with new partners so soon and expecting their child to live with a stranger just because they’re shagging them. Both selfish cunts.

You can also be on the mortgage (and deeds) without earning if that helps. I’m a SAHM right now but named on both.

Here we go

you don’t agree with me so you must have poor values. See this all the bloody time on here!

When my husband bought a house with a mortgage I wasn’t allowed on the deeds by the mortgage company because I wasn’t contributing to the the mortgage. I also had to sign a document to say that I wouldn’t get in the way if it ever came to be repossessed. I’m not sure if this is across the board for all mortgage companies but it’s what happened to us. Or did he buy the house outright?

Are you sure she’s not contributing if she’s on the deeds? I think it’s possible you don’t know everything about their arrangement.

what is it you think he should be doing? Buy a house for his ex? Have his child live with him and his new partner in the new house? It’s not clear what you think he should be doing.

She already lives with her new partner, why can’t he live with his? And unless his new partner is forcing him to not have his child round then he is also providing a home for his child. You’re being ridiculous.

You have made this much more complicated than it needs to be / your grip is that he’s put his new girlfriend on the deeds. I not getting how she choose the area etc if their relationship is so new as you are saying it is. Plus his ex also has a new partner so quickly? I suspect your dates are wrong. Regardless sounds like he was seeing this woman for longer than you think he was.

Are you sure this was the mortgage company’s request not your husband’s? I was not working when I was put on our joint house mortgage.

Hopefully it all end in tears for him.

To put your mind at rest OP, names on deeds are no big secret. You can get this information from The Land Registry.

How do you know he hasnt ringfenced his deposit that he put in via the inheritance?

He's obviously being led by his dick if he's put a woman on the deeds that hes known 5 weeks.
A big lesson to learn when it all goes tits up

Also any named adult intending to live at the property at the time he applied for the mortgage would have had to sign a legal document saying they have no claim on the property.
My adult over 18 daughter had to do this when we recently moved house.
I doubt very much new girlfriend is on the deeds if she isn’t on the mortgage. The lender wouldn’t allow it.

@Citycentre3 I was brought up to believe a father should provide for his children and not random women they barely know.

But he HAS provided for his daughter. He has purchased a house so he has a stable home to house her when she visits. What is the issue? You are not articulating it at all, just yabbering on about her not being provided for when the opposite is true. You obviously don’t like the fact he has a girlfriend, yet don’t seem to have an issue with the mother living with her boyfriend?

I suggest you take your nose out of other people's financial affairs and focus on being a stable influence for your niece.

None of the rest is any of your business and the way you are talking about people, living human beings is not morally right. Maybe look at yourself before getting all high and mighty about sitting in judgement of other people's morals.

OP I would think that they have bought the house as tenants in common and he has ring fenced his inheritance in the event they split.

In which case, he is protected even if she's on the title deeds and he's done exactly as you expected him to.

However, none of it is your business and you can't have any expectation that this information would be shared with you. I think you're jumping to conclusions and thinking the worst of him.

And the ex who moved her new bloke in with extreme speed?

This happened to me too and it was the mortgage company who enforced this. I saw the solicitor who explained it to us.

If it's values we're talking about I think moving a bloke into your house with your young child mere months after you split with the child's father is dodgy ground and certainly not a position from which to judge others.

What a horrible thing to hope for. You don't know anything about this couple other than the questionable things the OP has said about them.