is University education really overrated?

[lovethehighlands]

a relative came over just to brag how good her son did and the uni he's got and he's going to become some high flying medical engineer or something.

i simply said "my OH is a master carpenter skills he picked up from his family members and helping mates out and we still live comfortably and he did a NVQ at trade colleague"

my OH is in so much in demand as a carpenter/joiner that some people have to wait 3-4 months before they are seen to. lot of the house he's done himself.

surely people who go to University and college are just getting a crappy deal and fools? FIFTY GRAND debt!

why can't kids just become carpenters, plumbers, locksmiths, electricians etc where the money is!

i know people who went university in medical, teaching and they live the same as us. we have a house, we go on holidays, drive a nice car and have a great social life. (although OH is in depression which i've posted but pre covid he did martial arts)

so whats so special about University?

Matching her statement with a "oh well, my OH is this that and the other" gives the air that you are v much bothered. Uni isn't necessary, a good work ethic and money management is.

Oh that poor woman. She's excited about he son's results- it is results' day after all - and you somehow took it as a personal attack. For goodness sake! It sounds like you have a bit of a chip on your shoulder.

OP your suggesting that success is purely about money, houses and cars. I have a degree and Masters and couldn't do my job without these qualifications. I am looking to continue to do a PhD in the future to add to research in the medical field, how would we achieve advances in healthcare and technology without higher education? Consider who benefit from these advances as a whole nation.

My son is two years into his degree course. It remains to be seen if financially it works out in the end.

But... I can see it's totally transformed his horizons and given him a massive confidence boost.

In two years he has changed hugely for the better. His outlook on life is just so much more mature, he feels so much more rounded as a person.

I might pay the price as he now feels our small town to be too small for his ambition and goals, so I'll probably end up regretting that!

Anyway, I never went to Uni and regretted it even though I've done very well for myself financially. But I always felt I'd missed out on something when I compared myself to friends who did go to Uni, and now I think I know what it was.

I have two children. One has just graduated from university. The other wants to do an apprenticeship and has no intention of going.

Different people; different interests; different skills; career aspirations; different choices.

I'm proud of them both equally. Neither choice is better than the other. Just different 🤷🏻‍♀️

Their dad and I both graduated and have careers we couldn't otherwise have had. Their dad's brother got crap GCSEs and out earns both of us.

But I didn't go to university because I wanted to earn lots of money - or I wouldn't have chosen the career I did.

I went for the love of learning, exploring ideas, expanding my horizons and because I love a bit of intellectual challenge.

Tbh, I don't give a shit what anyone else does as long as they're happy.

I'd be asking myself why the huge chip if I were you. Sounds a little bit like you're protesting too much. Who are you trying to convince?

OMG why would anyone not want to go to university ?!!

How else would you get educated, meet huge numbers of people from diverse backgrounds, develop new interests, experience 3 years of carefree hedonism!

Should be compulsory - could argue that it's harder to participate in society and vote etc if you haven't experienced life outside your own backyard.

Why would you piss on his chips? He's proud of his child's achievement

You sound really tiresome

worth me mentioning it was her tone and attitude that put me off. of course i would praise her son and say well done for working hard to get that place.
but she made it out like he was a some genius with "he did'nt even revise and we would tell him off for playing his games and we dont even know how he passed getting all A's"

yeh right as if. i think her hubbie hired a tutor and splashed out on him. which is all fine but don't go lying about it like your son is Newton or Einstein and does'nt need to revise. then she started mentioning money and how he'll get a good job when he hasnt even attended the first lecture.

Loads of people with ability to build the basics, just not many with the knowledge to design various inventions ect

We need the tiger parents, to Shepard their children, especially when e.g. It's Russel group, ivy league, or Oxbridge ect

You’re coming across as a bit unhinged.

What do you do for a living, out of interest? Presumably nothing that involves coherent thought, punctuation or grammar?

My OH is considered a master in his carpentry profession, he had the experience and sometimes attends college courses at night just to get the certificates.

its so nice driving around town at the weekends and him pointing to all the work he's done. he did this awesome pub with a hand carved front extension that won an award. or he'd say "we finished that this week" and ofen have to tell him to button it lol!

not bad for a boy who did'nt go university and blew 50k. people mention expanding horizons, he's been places abroad where many graduates can't afford and yes he's met people through his hobby (before he got depression).

Your friend sounds annoying, for sure. She's probably just relieved that her thug of son did something well for once. Try not to let it get to you, OP. Maybe you should go back and do more study. You're obviously a passionate debater, you would like it. Education and philosophy maybe.

Regardless of whether university is 'worth it' that was a pretty mean response to your relative sharing exciting news about their daughter or son.
I do agree that university is not the right path for everyone and that others are often more lucrative. I've always personally loved learning & academic stuff though.

I agree with this.

What I took from your Opening post was that a relative came to share her relief and pride on results day, and you have such a big chip on your shoulder you couldn't say "Oh, that's great news. He must be so relieved. You must be so proud" like a normal family member would do when hearing about a nephew (or whatever relation it is to you).

Being proud of your dh's skills and work doesn't exclude most people from being able to be happy for someone else.

It isn't about whether one route or another is 'better'. It is about being pleased that someone in your family has achieved something that was a goal they had been working towards.

Actually, not philosophy. It's full of smug, pontificating men. You would be too annoyed by it, I think. Science maybe.

currently a homemaker to my two lads. my OH has had depression which i posted about last week so i don't work for now.

i am hoping he gets better because in September i've been offered an office admin job for a solicitors firm which will give me firm hours. But it depends on his health.

I also bake cakes for events, volunteer for the lgbtq+ community organising events!

Or, obviously, law or business studies.

FFS, OP.

It's didn't. Apostrophe for contraction. The apostrophe replaces the missing o from not.

It isn't did'nt.

It doesn't look good for you to be so derisory of those who pursued an education whilst so obviously revealing your lack of one.

Don't be silly. It's a casual message board, not a formal report. Don't be put off by this kind of nonsense, OP.

wait a sec. i did genuinely smile and was pleased for her and congratulated her warmly. but then her tone, looking down on people who didn't go university.
and she talks about plumbers "they can't even cobble two words i bet it doesn't take much brains to fit a tap and he was fiddling about it " she was referring to some plumbers who did her bathroom up as if they were thickos

i took offence to that obviously and told her academics etc is not for everyone and you can make it other ways and then mentioned my OH

Sounds like you were really unkind. She came over to share her good news and wanted to celebrate but you had to "put her straight". How mean. Why couldn't you just congratulate her son?

*wait a sec. i did genuinely smile and was pleased for her and congratulated her warmly. but then her tone, looking down on people who didn't go university.
and she talks about plumbers "they can't even cobble two words i bet it doesn't take much brains to fit a tap and he was fiddling about it " she was referring to some plumbers who did her bathroom up as if they were thickos

i took offence to that obviously and told her academics etc is not for everyone and you can make it other ways and then mentioned my OH*

OP, what you've just said bears absolutely no resemblance to your opening post. You said:

*a relative came over just to brag how good her son did and the uni he's got and he's going to become some high flying medical engineer or something.

i simply said "my OH is a master carpenter skills he picked up from his family members and helping mates out and we still live comfortably and he did a NVQ at trade colleague"*

I'm confused about which version of events actually happened now.

You say I’d just say “that’s brilliant - so happy for Fred!” and let her enjoy the moment. It’s nice to be happy for other people.