Partner won't eat fruit or veg!!!!

[user12312]

Hi ladies. Please help I'm at my wits end!
My partner WONT eat fruits or any type of vegetables. It's driving me insane. I feel like I'm dealing with one of the kids every day.

We have been together under 1 year and now it's really getting me down. He bokes even looking at veg. Both my kids eat a wide range of fruit and veg as do I. Then there's my partner who won't entertain them.
He told me he would make more of an effort and at least try different foods etc.
Tonight for example I put a couple spoons of sweetcorn (which was cooked in butter) on to his plate. He ate a bit and hid the rest under his lasagna and said he was finished. All the sweetcorn was under the leftovers.
It absolutely riles me as I feel like I'm dealing with a child.

It's really starting to make me feel differently about our relationship. It's actually putting me off him a bit if I'm entirely honest.

Any words of wisdom? Thanks

I love vegetables and salad. We are not vegetarians but we don't eat a lot of meat. Most of our meals involve a lot of vegetables in one form or another. I don't eat them just because I feel I should. I was very fortunate to grow up in a family of good cooks and my grandfather was a gardener so we always had vegetables as a matter of course and I've always enjoyed them. I can honestly say I like fruit and veg as much as cake and pizza.

Roasting is done in an oven not under a grill. Toasters mimic the act of toasting something either under a grill or (old fashioned) over a fire. You're toasting the cheese, not roasting it.

I agree with the OP. I couldn't live with someone like this at all and it's a terrible example to set kids

@Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g some I do
Nobody told me tomatoes are great with salt on! I love sweetcorn, strawberries, bananas, mushrooms, avocado, roasted kale
Will eat virtually anything put in front of me. Don't like spinach, leeks, aubergine or cauliflower but I eat them all

Make him a smoothie with banana, the healthy peanut butter with none of the bad fats, celery or spinach leaves, add in dash of soya milk, water, or fresh ginger or anything to take flavour of veg away, tastes lovely all blended up and he can get a good few veg in that way.

The power of the ick is strong.

Roasted cheese is just a regionalism. It's common in Scotland and probably some other areas. It really doesn't require this much analysis!

Is he living with you? You say you've been together 'less than a year' ... has he actually moved in with you and your DC? If not, just don't invite him round for meals.

I think posters are genuinely interested in what you get out of this relationship and why (if) he has moved in so quickly.

Does anyone really like vegetables?! Surely most people eat them because we want to be healthy and, if we have kids like OP, to encourage them to be healthy too?

Loads of people really like vegetables. Including kids. I’d say most kids like frozen peas or sweetcorn, for example. And this guy apparently doesn’t eat any fruit either - who doesn’t like a bowl of strawberries? Or a bunch of grapes? Practically nobody.

No, but I wish the OP would explain how the lasagne had no fruits or vegetables in it.

But at 35 he has been an adult for nearly half his life. His mother is not responsible for his behaviour, he is responsible for his behaviour.

To me, part of being a fully rounded adult would be to have developed a sophisticated palate. This doesn't mean that one has to eat everything there is but it does mean that during the process of growing up, one has gained a knowledge and appreciation of a whole range of foods.

I would worry about the emotional maturity of a person who behaves like a child when offered perfectly reasonable food to eat. What else has remained undeveloped in his character? Is he capable of being an equal partner?

@NotKevinTurvey I'm imagining a jar sauce, mince and pasta sheets?

maybe he just doesn’t like it? What’s the big deal.. I don’t like fish but I doubt my husband would divorce me over it

You missed horrible stinky bathroom squatting. Gross.

I think judging men by their height is also a bit ridiculous, but less so than with food. Height is a physical trait and you can’t help what looks you like, but food has literally no bearing unless they’re saying you can’t eat it either, which is different.

Most savoury things are better for a good sprinkling/grinding of salt and pepper! Tomatoes especially. I keep mine in a fruit bowl as they taste much better at room temperature than freezing cold from the fridge.

Why are you putting foods on his plate that he has told you he does not like? Flip it round, how would you feel in that situation?

He is an adult, and is capable of knowing what he does and doesn’t want to eat.

However, his immaturity is a whole other issue. Can you really see yourself accepting that behaviour from him years in the future?
Time to end things OP.

Nice idea, but a man who pretends to vomit when given a plate of food with vegetables on it doesn't strike me as likely to meekly tackle a smoothie.

I couldn't stand this, it's completely unattractive. Get rid @user12312!

I’d end it. You’re just not compatible. He’s not partner material.

And more generally I’ve been reading some of the comments about people should just eat what they like, what’s the big deal and thinking to myself that this is part of the reason the NHS is on its knees. The food we eat contributes hugely to our overall health, the links between poor diet and diseases like cancer and diabetes are well documented. It’s really scary to see how many people think it doesn’t matter

comments around eating habits really upset me, my children have ASD, their diets are as balanced as I can make them but I’d feel so heartbroken if someone looked down on them because of them not liking vegetables when they are older, it’s not their fault

There’s is a very big difference between those who are on the spectrum for eg not being able to eat certain things due to sensory issues, and those who won’t because they’re pans in the backside. And to be quite honest with you it wouldn’t bother me one bit what anyone though of my now adult son because his autism causes him to have a very limited diet. They’d be telling me loud and clear what they are and I wouldn’t give them a second thought - my son wouldn’t have a clue about what they were thinking so it wouldn’t bother him.

Is he a toddler?! If he doesn't want to eat it it not your problem. He can feed himself. I wouldn't be happy eating separate meals though.

I'm Scottish and it is cheese on toast to me!

Oh I'm guilty, have just read all ops posts. I'd be running for the hills.