From the College of Policing Guidance:
- Do not engage in, or pursue, a sexual or improper
emotional relationship, on or off duty, with any
member of the public who you have come into
contact with during the course of your current
work or duties.
- While you may find yourself attracted to a member
of the public, or find yourself in a situation where
someone is attracted to you, it is your responsibility
not to act on these feelings. This is to prevent any
harm that such actions may cause and to maintain
the integrity of the policing profession.
- Inform a line manager as soon as is practicable if a
member of the public attempts to pursue a sexual
or improper emotional relationship with you, so that
control measures can be put in place. Treat them
politely and considerately and try to re-establish a
professional boundary, in addition to informing your
line manager. If their behaviour continues, discuss
with your manager the most appropriate way for you
to respectfully disengage from that individual while
a policing response is still provided.
- Do not use your professional relationship with a
member of the public to pursue a relationship with
someone close to them. For example, do not use
visits to engage in or pursue a relationship with a
member of the public’s family member.
10. Do not end a professional relationship with a
member of the public solely to engage in or pursue
a personal relationship with them.
Relationships with members of the public
where there was previous professional contact
11. Depending on the circumstances, developing a
sexual or improper emotional relationship with a
member of the public with whom you have had
former professional contact may also amount to an
abuse of your position. Factors that may be relevant
when assessing whether the relationship would
represent an abuse of position include:
– degree of previous professional involvement
– length of previous professional involvement
– vulnerability of member of the public
currently and when professional contact
took place
– period since cessation of professional contact.
Power imbalance
12. It is your responsibility to be aware of the imbalance
of power between you as a member of a police
service and members of the public you come into
contact with through your work, and to maintain
professional boundaries. While a sexual or improper
emotional relationship with any member of the
public met through work is likely to be a breach of
this guidance, the breach will be aggravated where
the member of the public is particularly vulnerable.
You claim to still be in contact over email in a professional setting, so to start a relationship would involve him breaching the guidance. Of course, he could end that professional relationship with you to pursue something, but that would be a breach as well.
Honestly OP, from a professional standards point of view he's already on thin ice with his actions so far. If he was to pursue a relationship I'd say he'd either have to absolutely sure you are "the one" and willing to risk his job, or he doesn't care about the guidelines that tell him not to do this in which case I guarantee you're not the only woman with his personal number and he's not a good person. Make of that what you will.