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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Winking

103 replies

MatchPoint100 · 28/04/2022 06:13

There is a girl at work who really brightens my day. Not Pershing anything one because it's work and 2 because she has a boyfriend.

Anyway. I walk to my desk a different route sometimes to see her, she often looks towards me (she might at all that pass) often waves, acknowledges me most of the time, smiles etc. She is lovely basically, very bubbly.

The other day I walked past and she gave me a wink and as I sat at my desk I was like : 'Did she just wink at me'

Thoughts?

Doesn't matter either way just looking for a women's perspective. Won't act on anything, she just makes me feel good at the moment and it's lovely 😀

OP posts:
Revolut · 28/04/2022 06:19

There is a girl at work

If you work with children, you really shouldn’t be thinking like this. Or did you mean “there’s a woman at work” and you’re referring to a grown adult female? Would you refer to a male colleague as “a boy at work”?

Assuming the latter, you sound very full-on. Stop constantly walking past her desk and scrutinizing her.

Original poster
MatchPoint100 · 28/04/2022 06:24

@Revolut Jeeesus.

A woman at work.

I pass her desk as it is another route to go to my desk there are 2 and toilet is also that way.

I pass her desk very infrequently and mix up my route. I've not passed her desk all week.

OP posts:
Bessica1970 · 28/04/2022 06:31

More context?
How old is she/are you?

KangarooKenny · 28/04/2022 06:32

Have I been teleported to a Jackie magazine ?

Joystir59 · 28/04/2022 06:36

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

cookiemonster2468 · 28/04/2022 06:37

If you're not pursuing or acting or anything because she has a boyfriend, what advice/ thoughts are you looking for? It's not clear what you're asking.

moodycrow · 28/04/2022 06:38

I think she has a tic

Prudencia · 28/04/2022 06:44

OP you sound lovely and flirting with you brightens her day. Would she leave her boyfriend for you? Probably not.
Enjoy her company but try not become emotionally involved.

GalactatingGoddess · 28/04/2022 06:49

Need more info?
What advice are you seeking? How old are you/is she?
Are you single ?
Are you or her in positions of power?
Etc

Original poster
MatchPoint100 · 28/04/2022 06:53

@Prudencia

Thank you. I've come out of a horrible 12yr relationship, confidence is slowly coming back and she just brightens up my day and makes me feel good.

I'm new to company, she comes to talk to me etc and I enjoy her presence. I'm over 40.

Just looking for a woman's perspective on the wink. I'm into body language and the other day we were having a chat and she came out of her way to touch me.

This is why I delete the mumsnet app from time to time are because of horrible posts like above.

Not interested in anything, just the feel good factor and People's thoughts on the wink and not judgements on me being some kind of child/work predator 😂

OP posts:
Bessica1970 · 28/04/2022 06:53

The vipers are out this morning!
OP could be one of our sons navigating his way in his first workplace. It’s positive that more men are trying to get a woman’s perspective these days rather than just assume.
OP, some people are naturally flirty - you might find that she smiles/winks at everyone (and that’s fine).
Enjoy how it makes you feel but try not to read more than that into it.

runnerblade95 · 28/04/2022 06:53

If you work with children, you really shouldn’t be thinking like this.

I’ve read OP’s post 3 times and can’t see where he mentions working with children 🤨

Also, OP could still be quite young, hence why he’s referring to the lady as a girl. Hardly crime of the century.

Anyway OP, sounds lovely but just be mindful of the fact that she has a boyfriend. Also, it’s quite obvious that she knows that you like her, probably more than she likes you (otherwise she would have left her boyfriend for you), so just be aware that this could just be an ego boost for her as opposed to actually falling for you in the same way it sounds like you are falling for her.

Bretonbear · 28/04/2022 06:53

'And I was like did she just wink at me?' - have you got mumsnet confused with a teenage book writing forum?

Bretonbear · 28/04/2022 06:54

Bessica1970 · 28/04/2022 06:53

The vipers are out this morning!
OP could be one of our sons navigating his way in his first workplace. It’s positive that more men are trying to get a woman’s perspective these days rather than just assume.
OP, some people are naturally flirty - you might find that she smiles/winks at everyone (and that’s fine).
Enjoy how it makes you feel but try not to read more than that into it.

He's over 40. Not a young lad starting his first job.

runnerblade95 · 28/04/2022 06:55

@Bessica1970 The vipers are out this morning!

Tell me about it! Ready to attack the poor guy just because he likes a woman at work ffs 🙄

lollipoprainbow · 28/04/2022 06:57

@Revolut who rattled your cage

Original poster
MatchPoint100 · 28/04/2022 06:57

Yip. The vipers are out.

I'm not falling for her, it's just nice. Nothing wrong with that. Just thought I'd ask for opinions but guess I asked to be attacked.

I realise she is flirty and bubbly and just nice. Literally never had a woman wink at me before or if they have I can read it as it's meant to be e.g a joke/friendly etc.

I apologise profusely for asking

OP posts:
lollipoprainbow · 28/04/2022 06:58

@Bretonbear @Joystir59 why the need to be so nasty ??

Hawkins001 · 28/04/2022 06:59

It's puzzling why some posters put more effort into viping, rather than engaging and helping the op with the question.

lollipoprainbow · 28/04/2022 06:59

@MatchPoint100 a lot of girls (sorry women) on here are man haters !! Ignore them and enjoy your flirtation, if it brightens your day why not.

Original poster
MatchPoint100 · 28/04/2022 06:59

@lollipoprainbow @Hawkins001

Thank you.

OP posts:
Original poster
MatchPoint100 · 28/04/2022 07:00

@lollipoprainbow

Oooh I know. I've been in here for 12 years.

OP posts:
runnerblade95 · 28/04/2022 07:01

Just looking for a woman's perspective on the wink. I'm into body language and the other day we were having a chat and she came out of her way to touch me.

Every woman is different. I’m personally not a touchy feely type of person so if a man or woman for that matter, touched me in my place of work, even if it was just on the shoulder and not in a flirty way, I would be uncomfortable with that.

However, she may be a touchy feely type of person in which case, it could be deemed as flirting but she could also just be … touching you for the sake of touching you!

Body language isn’t really my forte but that’s the best answer I can give.

By the way, ignore the negative replies. They serve no purpose whatsoever. Good luck OP

NashvilleQueen · 28/04/2022 07:01

Did you say how old she is?

theshavenraven · 28/04/2022 07:02

Revolut · 28/04/2022 06:19

There is a girl at work

If you work with children, you really shouldn’t be thinking like this. Or did you mean “there’s a woman at work” and you’re referring to a grown adult female? Would you refer to a male colleague as “a boy at work”?

Assuming the latter, you sound very full-on. Stop constantly walking past her desk and scrutinizing her.

At my work all the sales team are women in their twenties and thirties. They refer to themselves as the sales girls

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