Page 6 | My girlfriends wants money after two months

gfwantsmoney · 2022-03-16T21:23:24+00:00

That is really. I have been seeing this woman for a couple of months. We have seen each other every couple of weeks since January and everything is fantastic. We talk almost every day. She is beautiful, interesting and I really like her. I could see a future for us after being single for a long time. The only problem is that she just told me she needs 500 pounds a month to pay her rent each month. She is not from the UK so she said in her country it is normal for a boyfriend to pay for things for his girlfriend. Is she taking me for a ride? I can afford the 500 pounds.

Calandor · 16/03/2022 23:46

That's not a girlfriend that's a sugar baby!

notangelinajolie · 16/03/2022 23:46

So you have met a woman who is a bit younger than you. You have seen her 6 times. She lives in a different country and wants you to send her £500 a month.

Um, let me think ..

PinkSyCo · 16/03/2022 23:48

Prostitutes/sex workers or whatever you want to call them advertise sex for sale, they don’t reel you in emotionally and pretend to be your girlfriend do they Oppy? OP doesn’t want a prostitute. Sorry if that doesn’t suit you.

Calphurnia88 · 16/03/2022 23:49

@Oppy you keep saying 'she is a human being' as if this is an acceptable excuse for her attempting to scam OP out of money.

OP is also a human being, surely he deserves better than this? Nothing in his posts suggests that he is looking for a transactional relationship.

youvegottenminuteslynn · 17/03/2022 00:02

@Oppy

I’m not trying to be cool thank you, it’s my opinion. Don’t see how I was defending her particularly either. What makes you think “prostitutes” are any more honest than this woman, everyone is different. Calling a spade a spade doesn’t work because what a spade is is a subjective matter of opinion. I do know she is a human being. And anyway as far as I know women who are paid for sex prefer to be referred to as sex workers, isn’t their an alliance called something like that.. I will admit I don’t know for sure and maybe some women who are paid for sex prefer to be called prostitutes, but you don’t know they want to be names prostitutes either. And to use your logic, if he offers to pay her per meet then he is taking control and making it an more honest transaction

He doesn't want to visit sex workers / escorts / prostitutes or he would do so.

He wants a relationship which is why he's dating and why he wants a genuine connection with someone.

Paying a sex worker to have sex with you is not anywhere close to a relationship. It removes the emotional intimacy, potential for a future together and shared goals that a relationship entails.

You're speaking to OP as if he should automatically be fine with paying someone to have sex with him just because he's a bloke.

Would you really tell a woman who was in this situation (that someone she dated a few times asked for money to continue dating) that she should pay him per encounter and that it could be a positive experience?

You sound either incredibly naive, very jaded or very unaware of genuine intimacy. Or a mix of all three.

Oppy · 17/03/2022 00:07

@PinkSyCo

Prostitutes/sex workers or whatever you want to call them advertise sex for sale, they don’t reel you in emotionally and pretend to be your girlfriend do they Oppy? OP doesn’t want a prostitute. Sorry if that doesn’t suit you.

You’re making a lot of assumptions if you don’t mind me saying. It neither suits me nor doesn’t suit me. Maybe not all people who are paid for sex advertise, I’m sure there are many ways such connections are made besides advertising and maybe not all of them refrain from emotional enticement, or indeed are immune from becoming emotionally vulnerable with clients themselves.

PinkSyCo · 17/03/2022 00:13

I think it’s you who are making all the assumptions Oppy. You are assuming that OP should be happy to make a deal with a woman, who pretended to form an emotional bond with him, to start paying her for sex. I find this very odd!

Oppy · 17/03/2022 00:21

I’m not naive, jaded or unaware of genuine intimacy. Quite the opposite. And I’m not saying he should be automatically fine with my opinion, I was suggesting an option which makes sense to me. Plenty of men happily pay for sex and company and always have done, I imagine some women do too. I don’t understand why some of you are getting exercised by it.

Oppy · 17/03/2022 00:22

@PinkSyCo

I think it’s you who are making all the assumptions Oppy. You are assuming that OP should be happy to make a deal with a woman, who pretended to form an emotional bond with him, to start paying her for sex. I find this very odd!

I’m not assuming any such thing. You’re assuming I’m assuming. I wasn’t. It was an option I put forward

beinggreen · 17/03/2022 00:27

In my country, it's normal for men to give £500 per month to random women who post on their forum threads.

Thanks in advance.

bubblesbubbles11 · 17/03/2022 00:30

"Paying a sex worker to have sex with you is not anywhere close to a relationship. It removes the emotional intimacy, potential for a future together and shared goals that a relationship entails"

But the above is what most men, at some point in their lives, want.
How that materialises differs (affairs, prostitution, extreme "midlife crisis", holidays to xxx (for the women but do not tell the wife) etc)
That is the truth.

Ieatmarmite · 17/03/2022 00:34

Run a mile OP - soon, as well as rent, it will be money to get her car repaired, money to pay for her mother's hospital stay back in her home country etc etc.

Annette32123 · 17/03/2022 00:35

@Oppy

I’m not trying to be cool thank you, it’s my opinion. Don’t see how I was defending her particularly either. What makes you think “prostitutes” are any more honest than this woman, everyone is different. Calling a spade a spade doesn’t work because what a spade is is a subjective matter of opinion. I do know she is a human being. And anyway as far as I know women who are paid for sex prefer to be referred to as sex workers, isn’t their an alliance called something like that.. I will admit I don’t know for sure and maybe some women who are paid for sex prefer to be called prostitutes, but you don’t know they want to be names prostitutes either. And to use your logic, if he offers to pay her per meet then he is taking control and making it an more honest transaction

Your opinion is weird. And very clearly this is your issue and nothing to do with the Op so it’s derailing. The sex trade is bad for women - it doesn’t matter what you call the women involved, it’s not a trade people self select into unless they are desperate. No decent man uses prostitutes and it is insulting of you to assume the Op would want to buy sex. Nothing in the Ops posts suggested he would wish to do so - your imagination has taken you down some flight of fancy disconnected to reality. Goodness knows why. But clearly this is about you and not about the Op, or his now ex love interest. Maybe reflect on why you took this discussion down the path you did? Saying it’s your opinion doesn’t cut it because there were no cues to take it down this route. Or maybe you just make odd assumptions about young foreign women and all men routinely.

youvegottenminuteslynn · 17/03/2022 00:39

@bubblesbubbles11

"Paying a sex worker to have sex with you is not anywhere close to a relationship. It removes the emotional intimacy, potential for a future together and shared goals that a relationship entails"

But the above is what most men, at some point in their lives, want.
How that materialises differs (affairs, prostitution, extreme "midlife crisis", holidays to xxx (for the women but do not tell the wife) etc)
That is the truth.

You think "most" men don't want emotional intimacy, potential for a future together and shared goals that a relationship entails.

You must know mainly misogynists who want sex without wanting to be with a woman as a whole person tbh.

cherrysthename · 17/03/2022 00:39

She's not a scam artist or con woman because she hasn't duped the OP or weaved an improbable web of lies or made false promises in order to obtain money. Nor is she a sex worker 😂 you would know if you'd sought out a sex worker, booked an appointment, had sex and exchanged cash in return for it.
What she's done is outright ask him for money. So she's a cheeky fucker but OP is free to say yes or no.

cherryonthecakes · 17/03/2022 00:47

I guess she doesn't know which websites are good for finding sugar daddies.

AuntyBumBum · 17/03/2022 00:51

Fannylodger

Oppy · 17/03/2022 00:56

Annette. Nope, not my issue. How do you know it's not something the OP would consider, I'm not saying it is, I'm not saying it isn't, I have no idea. I didn't say the sex trade wasn't bad for women. Didn't assume the OP would want to pay for sex. No flights of fancy. Nothing to do with me, no reflection needed. And, finally, I make no assumptions about young "foreign" women and "all men".

PinkSyCo · 17/03/2022 01:00

@cherrysthename the woman has duped OP though, into pretending she liked him.

RedRobin100 · 17/03/2022 01:12

@PeacefulPrune

Is she taking me for a ride?

Yes

This

PinkSyCo · 17/03/2022 01:17

*If you like her and enjoy having sex with her just pay her per meet, DO NOT agree to a monthly fee. At the end of the day she is a human being making her way through a complex life. She probably hasn’t hurt anyone. You can practice technique and gain sexual confidence that will help draw genuine emotionally based relationships. If you pay per meet she’ll treat you very well I’m sure. I’d probably insist on a sexual health check though x

Just reread your post again @Oppy and it seems you are not only very much assuming that OP would/should be happy to have an emotionless pay for sex relationship with this woman, but you also think she’d be good for OP to practice his sexual technique on too.

Annette32123 · 17/03/2022 01:19

@Oppy

Annette. Nope, not my issue. How do you know it's not something the OP would consider, I'm not saying it is, I'm not saying it isn't, I have no idea. I didn't say the sex trade wasn't bad for women. Didn't assume the OP would want to pay for sex. No flights of fancy. Nothing to do with me, no reflection needed. And, finally, I make no assumptions about young "foreign" women and "all men".

In which case, how on earth did you take what he actually asked us about and conclude that it was appropriate that he might want to contemplate offering to pay her for sexual services? Or did you just think it sounds like she needs cash, maybe you can use this as a chance to exploit her life poverty and get her to go on the game?! Nothing of the thread suggested she wanted to sell sex or that he wanted to buy sex. Nothing suggested he needed to gain sexual experience. Why did you think he might need that? Why did you think she might want that?

If someone posted asking how to make their food budget stretch, they would generally get people advising meal planning and batch cooking. Would you suggest the solution is to sell sex to make extra cash? Your comments here are as bizarre as that would be. It’s an opinion. It might even be what she wants to do. But it’s a leap. And a bizarre suggestion.

So yes, it’s you.

Calphurnia88 · 17/03/2022 01:36

This thread in a nutshell.

OP: A woman I have been dating for 2 months, but consider my GF and see long-term potential with, has recently asked me to pay her £500/month rent bill ongoing. She says this is custom in her home country, but I am unsure as I am new to dating. Is this normal?

Majority of replies: No this is not normal, and probably a scam.

Oppy: Have you considered paying her for sex?

BottleBrushTree · 17/03/2022 01:42

Yeah scammer. Next thing it will be a giant sob story about how someone in her family is desperately ill or being held for ransom … and only you can save them, with your money.

HoppingPavlova · 17/03/2022 01:48

Absolutely not.
I’m guessing she has several boyfriends silly enough to be taken for a ride and all paying her rent. She’s laughing no end in the background.