Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Too Many Cats

134 replies

ImJustMadAboutSaffron · 11/03/2022 00:00

Do you think having cats is a relationship dealbreaker/guys would find it weird? And how many cats is too many cats?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
12
Notdoingthis · 11/03/2022 22:27

I hate cats and I probably am a bit controlling. I am nice though. I also have 2 cats. Because the kids wanted them. So I am not that controlling!

Shunter350 · 11/03/2022 22:27

@ImJustMadAboutSaffron

Do you think having cats is a relationship dealbreaker/guys would find it weird? And how many cats is too many cats?
Nope!
Lampan · 11/03/2022 22:34

People are allowed to set their own dealbreakers. If someone doesn’t like cats they’re probably not compatible with you. I don’t like cats and anyone with a cat photo on their dating profile would be a no from me, so for me one cat would me too many. Each to their own 😬

Arucanafeather · 11/03/2022 22:42

My BIL isn’t a pet person at all but he loves my sister very much so they have dogs, cats & other pets and even foster pets for a charity. He’s not keen but is always kind (& they all love him). There is a big difference IMO between someone who isn’t keen but is kind (like my DH and my BIL) and people who aren’t keen and show it… my BIL’a brother shoved one of my cats off who’s jumped up on the arm of his chair and I have never felt the same about him since! When the kids have friends over, I tell them the first rule in our house is be kind to cats which includes leaving them alone if that is what the cat wants!

Headexplodinganyoneelse · 11/03/2022 22:49

Japanesejazz Your Aunt was so right. My old cat always bit my exh when we were together. He obviously knew he was a bad one. Funnily enough my new cat does the same when my ex drops the kids off. Quite funny really as my cat is an absolutely huge beast the size of a small dog. Got him from CPL & he was previously feral & hadn't been snipped. Personally I've never had such a big softy, he also loves my partner who incidentally also has a rescue cat.
The only time there's too many cats is when the house stinks, or there's hair everywhere, other than that more the merrier Grin

Desolate2nite · 11/03/2022 22:50

I have 4 cats, they are well looked after and insured, my house is spotless.
I would not date someone who didn't like cats

Hoowhoowho · 11/03/2022 23:16

Isn’t there a song about this?

whenwillthemadnessend · 11/03/2022 23:18

I would Never be with someone who didn't like cats. Or animals in general

Not to be trusted

scoobydoo1971 · 11/03/2022 23:23

I have 4 cats and 2 dogs, and 200 goldfish. They live in a large property with myself and two children. Two cats are strays who were adopted, got vet care and now have nice lives. I inherited one dog and the fish from my late mother. I may not have chosen all these animals, but I would put them against my need to date someone. I love them, and so do my children. I try to give them a nice life. Any potential love interest who cannot accept them or me is not ok, and not a long term prospect. I tell my children never to trust people who dislike animals. Honestly, they are an utter joy. They maybe hard work with the cleaning and care, but they are devoted to you.

AwayInMyMind · 11/03/2022 23:55

I don't like cats.

But I love my 3 cats. I was always scared of the unpredictable of cats growing up. My own cats are different, they are my arseholes, we have an understanding (that I am their human slave).

Honestly, I'd not like a new partner to have any cats - I'm scared of them !

WaterBottle123 · 11/03/2022 23:57

@Suprima

Men who vocally hate cats should be avoided They can’t deal with things that don’t need their approval and validation constantly
This
Frollop · 12/03/2022 02:29

I love catsGrin

At this stage of my life I'd choose them over a man...

ImJustMadAboutSaffron · 12/03/2022 07:26

Both my ex and my best friend hate cats but love and fawn over dogs. My friend hates them to the extent she can't buy a birthday card that has a picture of a cat on it and I wasn't allowed to talk about losing my cat in front of her.

OP posts:
Ludo19 · 12/03/2022 13:32

Wait OP you weren't allowed to talk about the sad loss of your pet to your friend??

Some friend!

I have 6 never been a problem for me. My cats are kept clean, well fed and no expense spared but I do work in a vets so it comes with my job.

Chose your next partner wisely x

Ludo19 · 12/03/2022 13:33

*choose

BillMasen · 12/03/2022 13:54

@whenwillthemadnessend

I would Never be with someone who didn't like cats. Or animals in general

Not to be trusted

I don’t like pets. I wouldn’t harm one at all, but I don’t want to share my house with one.

Why does that make me untrustworthy?

InABetterPlaceNow · 12/03/2022 14:05

I had 3 cats when I first got with my DP. He's allergic. He insisted it wouldn't be an issue and spent as much time as possible with friends with cats in the lead up to coming to mine for the first time.

Over Xmas my daughter rescued a "bonus kitten". He laughed at me when I said it was going to a rescue and named it over video chat. I now have 4 cats.

It can be fun and games chasing them out of the bedroom when he stays over but hasn't proved an big issue so far! The one time one refused to leave, his eyes did start streaming but he refused antihistamines and was very stoic about it.

We'll see how it goes but pets and kids are part of the package I think?

ImJustMadAboutSaffron · 12/03/2022 15:15

@Ludo19

Wait OP you weren't allowed to talk about the sad loss of your pet to your friend??

Some friend!

I have 6 never been a problem for me. My cats are kept clean, well fed and no expense spared but I do work in a vets so it comes with my job.

Chose your next partner wisely x

Yes she pulled a face like a tomcat licking cat wee from a thistle whenever I said anything.
OP posts:
thecatneuterer · 12/03/2022 15:53

I've got 25 or so cats. It's never been a problem. My current partner adores cats and keeps complaining when his favourite ones get rehomed and wants to keep them all. If I'd listened to him I'd now have at least 60 cats!

I suppose it's one more thing to factor into who is worth dating - so cat haters/people who are allergic to cats will be ruled out. As were also, when I was younger, men who wanted children for example. So I suppose it reduces your pool, but there are still plenty of men in the remaining pool and, having filtered out the animal haters, you have already, in my opinion, eliminated a lot of unpleasant people from that pool. So, in a sense, win-win.

Georgeskitchen · 12/03/2022 17:03

There is no such thing as too many cats 🤣🤣😍

StrangerLife · 12/03/2022 20:11

I have 1 now but used to have 5. Wouldn't do that again but it was fine at the time. I also now have 8 dogs, that is too many I'm finding out but I'd rather them over any relationship and would only want a relationship with people who are OK with them.

VeryMuchFlaggingMinty · 13/03/2022 02:31

I have two...the men I've met haven't been bothered,but I've been put off the men who have been totally disinterested!

psychomath · 13/03/2022 02:31

1-2 cats would be a bonus, 3 is an acceptable number, 4+ would start giving me crazy cat lady/man vibes Smile

ToCaden · 13/03/2022 07:49

@LaurenKelsey

I wouldn’t be thinking about whether my cats are a dealbreaker for a man. I would be be thinking about how a man not liking q my cats is an absolute dealbreaker for me.
This. If your cat's are important to you, then find someone who will also value them. Relationships are full of compromise, but you've got to put your foot down on the important things.

After all if you had five children you wouldn't be thinking about getting rid of some in order to get a boyfriend.

ToCaden · 13/03/2022 07:52

And if you are cat obsessed, find a guy who is too.