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Original poster

Too Many Cats

134 replies

ImJustMadAboutSaffron · 11/03/2022 00:00

Do you think having cats is a relationship dealbreaker/guys would find it weird? And how many cats is too many cats?

OP posts:
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12
RedWingBoots · 11/03/2022 09:17

@Bringsexyback

I have been dumped due to too many pets, One dog and two cats apparently is a step too far.
Really?

That's a normal of amount of pets if you have the space.

Guess the people who dumped you couldn't cope with your pets trying to snuggle up to them and get food out of them.

It is a bit disconcerting to eat something and have 6 eyes begging you for food until most of those eyes realise that won't work with you.

TheReddestJohansson · 11/03/2022 09:24

I’d avoid anyone who was so boring with their clichéd life outlook that they judged someone for having enough love to share with any animals and they’d fallen for the “spinster with cats” misogyny that should make a thinking person yawn.

That said: are they indoor/outdoor cats? Where do they sleep/eat/poop? Are you good at cleaning up after them? Is there cat hair everywhere? That’s what will really decide if you have “too many”.

Original poster
ImJustMadAboutSaffron · 11/03/2022 09:28

@pointythings

I have 4 cats (as of 3 weeks ago, was 2 before then). All rescues. I am single and have no intention of changing that - but if I were to date, any man would have to accept the cats.

It does matter whether you can afford them - I thought long and hard about getting the other two. But I have a big enough house that they can all be in a different room if they want, and they all get on really well.

Same at my house. I am WFH today and they all have their own space. I spend a fortune on food for them - they have fresh food, KatKin, Blink! and I bought fresh tuna for one of them for her birthday.
OP posts:
Original poster
ImJustMadAboutSaffron · 11/03/2022 09:31

@TheReddestJohansson

I’d avoid anyone who was so boring with their clichéd life outlook that they judged someone for having enough love to share with any animals and they’d fallen for the “spinster with cats” misogyny that should make a thinking person yawn.

That said: are they indoor/outdoor cats? Where do they sleep/eat/poop? Are you good at cleaning up after them? Is there cat hair everywhere? That’s what will really decide if you have “too many”.

Mix of indoor and outdoor - one is a diva who won't go out at all. They have their own beds in their own spaces though they share and snuggle up sometimes (one slept on the bed last night though!) Litter tray cleaned at least three times daily. Cleaner fortnightly and vacuumed daily at least once by me. Own eating spaces in the kitchen and bowls washed up immediately afterwards (except breakfast when rushing out in the mornings!)
OP posts:
Bringsexyback · 11/03/2022 09:41

@RedWingBoots theyd not eaten in front of the animals so it certainly wasnt that off putting.
I literally think that some people expect that you’ve lived your life alone sat waiting for them to come along and anything at all that’s happened before they arrived in your life is little more than a distraction until they came along to save you from all. idiots

Elieza · 11/03/2022 09:42

As long as visitors to the cat household can sit on a sofa and the house is hoovered and doesn’t smell of cat piss I don’t see the number of cats being a problem.

It’s when you walk in and your nose get hit with a blast of pee, can’t get a seat for cats lounging around, fur everywhere sticking to your clothes, cats fighting, fireballs or accidents lying unremoved on carpets etc. yeah that’s not fun.

A few cats lounging and clean litter trays, not a problem Grin

RedWingBoots · 11/03/2022 09:54

@Bringsexyback Oh those kind of dates...

@Elieza but if a cat takes a like to you they may sit on your lap then you get fur on your clothes. (And then climb on you when you are asleep.)

Casper001 · 11/03/2022 10:00

I think above 2 cats is when you start to think potential crazy cat lady....

Pearlyqueen21 · 11/03/2022 10:01

Nothing to add to this (my DH would be keen to get more than the 2 cats we have, but I’m sticking with 2), but you might enjoy this song from Crazy Ex-Girlfriend
NSFW Wink
Basically, you should choose your partner according to their ability to love your cats! It’s definitely a good sign if they’re pro-pet 👍

Elieza · 11/03/2022 10:02

This is true redwing. Hadnt considered that as I love cats curling up on my lap or snuggling in bed. As have my ex’s. Although only once I’ve groomed the loose fluff off! Or it makes me itchy in bed!

Trinacham · 11/03/2022 10:07

No...
Both me and DH had cats growing up (in fact he was possibly more of a cat person than me) and we chose to home our 2 cats when we were together.
Always a good sign when they're an animal lover as means they have a lot of empathy.

Trinacham · 11/03/2022 10:09

@elieza I can spend hours hoovering and you'll still leave with fur stuck to your clothes. Best not to wear anything dark😄

BillMasen · 11/03/2022 10:12

I wouldn’t date anyone with cats (or dogs). I know on here that makes me cold, uncaring, evil and is a massive red flag.

I don’t like the hair, the smell, the being tied to looking after them, when they rub up against you. It’s just my preference

So I don’t date the pet people and they don’t date me. Everyone is ok with that.

Palmfrond · 11/03/2022 10:31

2-3 cats max. And no matter how many cats you have, if there is any whiff of that cat smell, that’s a regretful but nonetheless hard pass from me.
And before team cat get all defensive, it’s okay, my house smells of dogs.

Original poster
ImJustMadAboutSaffron · 11/03/2022 10:31

@Casper001

I think above 2 cats is when you start to think potential crazy cat lady....
No hope for me then!
OP posts:
FlibbertyGibbitt · 11/03/2022 10:35

@Japanesejazz

Never trust anyone who doesn’t like cats I was given that advice when I was a child by my favourite great aunt and it’s never been proved wrong yet. I’m nearly 50 Generally I’ve found in life, people who have cats are less controlling than people who don’t like cats all my 3 cats are rescues 2 of them were about to be drowned in a canal by their owner (male) he obviously didn’t like them much So there’s a difference between liking cats and having one But when I saw how much my partner loved his cat - he went up in my estimation I foster for CPL so we often go up to 5 on a temporary basis Cats are like chocolate It’s hard to just have one
❤️ you are a lovely person ❤️
pointythings · 11/03/2022 10:42

@Casper001

I think above 2 cats is when you start to think potential crazy cat lady....
I totally am!
AllThingsServeTheBeam · 11/03/2022 10:42

@Casper001

I think above 2 cats is when you start to think potential crazy cat lady....
Nah. At least 5 times that
Elieza · 11/03/2022 10:42

@Trinacham ….or indeed any clothes at all ha ha!

Mine weren’t too bad sheddingwise. I think the breed must make some cats shed more than others.

I don’t mind a bit of fur myself as long as it’s not in my bed, but a visitor might not feel the same so I tried to do a good clean prior with rubber gloves if bad as it sticks to them.

My ex stepmother ‘kindly’ tidied up my living room after a visit (while I was in the loo), by putting the remains of the cream tea we hadn’t finished into the kitchen. The kitchen the cats were in during her visit so they wouldn’t annoy her.

So much for me scoffing the cream cakes later….The cats enjoyed licking the cream out of the cakes though Grin

CatLoverAlways · 11/03/2022 10:42

My husband agreed to one cat.
We then had two.
Then I fostered and adopted two cats from Romania (that made 4), both street cats, one was elderly and one was epileptic, the elderly one who was a foster was adopted by my sister.
We also helped foster two other homeless cats in the UK until they found their humans, one of them I spent a week feeding in the pouring rain, in a bid to gain her trust.
My latest rescue was a cat from abroad, rescued from deaths door and adopted by my Mum.
His story is a sad but happy one but he’s now living his best life ❤️

Oh and the husband is still with me…😂

OldTinHat · 11/03/2022 10:43

One single cat would be a breaker for me. I'm extremely allergic to them.

Now a dog or six...that would be fine! 😁

RockinHorseShit · 11/03/2022 10:46

Not for the right man & I certainly wouldn't want a man who didn't like animals, something very wrong in anyone who thinks like that AFIAC.

I had 3 when I got together with my now DH, he wasn't a cat lover, but it didn't put him off. We now joke he's the family pussy magnet as he's constantly covered in cats & loves it. They've massively grown on him

Friend had 15 cats when she met her now DH & they are still very happy after 15 years

Yes it puts some off, but it won't put off the right man. I'd say it was actually a good way to filter out the dross myself

Runnerduck34 · 11/03/2022 11:24

I love cats so cant see why it would be a deal dealbraker and if it was ( unless he had severe allergy) he wouldn't be with knowing.
I suppose if you had a dozen cats people may think its unusual but if it's a just a couple it wouldn't be impactful at all. How many cats do you have?

FourChimneys · 11/03/2022 11:33

Well, I don't like cats so wouldn't have wanted a relationship which included them. DH doesn't like them either so we are well matched.

RockinHorseShit · 11/03/2022 11:34

Oh & DHs cat allergic best mate has just got engaged to his cat loving GF who has 3 cats. He's managing fine with antihistamines & a bedroom ban for the cats