Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

"Teen" Porn

85 replies

LadyBananaHammock · 20/02/2022 21:27

Partner of 25 years, 61 years old. I am 55. We don’t live together. Turns out he has a penchant for teen porn. I rumbled him before and he swore he would never do it again. And yet here we are some years later. He even wrote out a signed contract to say never again. His idea, not mine. Put it on his fridge and there it remains. What a joke.

The recent sites have models who are…apparently 18 years old, but MY GOD, they look so young. About 13, if I’m honest. I feel a bit ill. He’s been impotent for years and was never that into sex, tbh, so what the hell is this all about?

I’m so depressed. I have struggled with bulimia for years and now it has returned with a vengeance. I'm not blaming him, I take full responsibility for my illness, but dear Lord, it’s so hard to feel good about myself right now.

We have other problems, which I have chosen to ignore because of his umpteen good qualities. I am in recovery from child sexual abuse (which he knows all about), so perhaps my issues are getting the better of me. I probably shouldn’t be taking all this so seriously. The girls look so young, though. Maybe I shouldn’t have checked up on him. Serves me right for snooping.

Please help me get over this.

OP posts:
waterrat · 20/02/2022 22:17

Sadly very common op. And clearly a route for some to moving on to real children. I work in this field and I'm speaking with experience. This is a very dangerous path for him to be on.

Hiddenvoice · 20/02/2022 22:26

I don’t think this is something you should get over and accept.
He lied to you and it’s definitely weird. Even is the girls are 18, they are still teenagers.

I think you need to separate from him.
You’ve been together a long time and it’s not progressed to living together. You don’t trust him, don’t think you can now.
None of this is your fault, please don’t blame yourself for snooping! Take the chance to break away from him.

Smallkeys · 20/02/2022 22:29

Isn’t it about time for men to realise even if it is legal or crosses a line. All these guys thinking sex with much younger woman is acceptable but it’s really not and a lot of these fellas will have daughters , nieces , sisters and mothers .

D0lphine · 20/02/2022 22:38

Yeah teen porn does this. The girls will be 18, but they're chosen because they look immature and child like.

Porn is damaging for women but porn of this variety is particularly vile.

Not surprised your bulemia is bad- take care of yourself.

greasyshoes · 20/02/2022 22:44

@legalseagull

I'd have no reservations at all about calling police. What makes you think they're 18 if they look 13?! Because he says they are? Because the name of the film says they are? Call the police and boot his disgusting peado arse out

Pornographers generally won't employ under 18s, and risk all of the legal consequences, when there is absolutely no shortage of 20-somethings to act in their videos.

We don't know anything about the website, but genuine illegal pornography is mostly confined to the dark web. If the video has some kind of branding, or logo, then it's definitely not illegal.

I am surprised that someone with "legal" in their username is completely oblivious to the fact that almost all teen porn features non-teenage women.

Feelingoktoday · 20/02/2022 22:44

Awful OP. So sorry. I think if you finished the relationship you would start to feel better.

MrsSkylerWhite · 20/02/2022 22:48

You “shouldn’t be taking this so seriously”?

He’s really done a number on you, hasn’t he?

He’s a sick bastard, at best, a dangerous bastard at worst.

Get as far away from him as you possibly can.

Pinkbonbon · 20/02/2022 22:49

@Hiddenvoice

I don’t think this is something you should get over and accept. He lied to you and it’s definitely weird. Even is the girls are 18, they are still teenagers.

I think you need to separate from him.
You’ve been together a long time and it’s not progressed to living together. You don’t trust him, don’t think you can now.
None of this is your fault, please don’t blame yourself for snooping! Take the chance to break away from him.

I would assume they don't live together because they don't want to though tbf. Living together isn't the natural progression for everyone.
Avarua · 20/02/2022 22:51

I personally think you should be 21 before being 'legal' to act in porn. 18 year olds are extremely vulnerable to exploitation.
Feel the same way about the armed forces, too. No-one under 21.

undetetected · 20/02/2022 22:56

There's two types of teen porn. There's young women, who are just petite, then there's the ones they dress up and do pigtails to make look a lot younger, like actual kids.

The latter is very ick indeed, and I'd be concerned about wanting 'more' and getting bored of the fantasy.

But it really depends because teen is sometimes used as another word for young and petite, which tbh, isn't that unusual. This type are clearly adults and don't look like teens beside being thinner and short.

Crikeyalmighty · 20/02/2022 23:13

@LadyBananaHammock. I understand how you feel, my H is busy cracking off to various porn things the minute I’m out the door 4 or 5 times a week. It’s very easy to say it’s no big deal- as a woman of 60 and not quite such a pretty young thing as I was (although not bad for my age) I really don’t like him even looking at me like a dog chasing a bone. Virtually all amateur and lesbian and I simply have lost any attraction he doesn’t know I know — I don’t think men realise not all women are remotely cool with frequent secretive use whether it’s teen or not

PickAChew · 20/02/2022 23:15

You can't get over this. Your partner is revolting.

waterrat · 20/02/2022 23:21

Nope not true that illegal child abuse material is mostly on the dark Web.

The Internet watch foundation.. the body that removes illegal material from the Web in the UK day in day out has said in their own reports that most illegal material is found on the open Web.

Google the Children of Pornhub New York Times and read ah amazing investigation into the child abuse material on mainstream porn sites

LondonQueen · 20/02/2022 23:21

That's gross, a pensioner looking at girls who could be his grandchildren.

MrsSkylerWhite · 20/02/2022 23:24

PickAChew

You can't get over this. Your partner is revolting.”

Yes. This. I was reaching for the precise word earlier but couldn’t find it.

Revolting. That’s it.

MrsSkylerWhite · 20/02/2022 23:25

@LadyBananaHammock. I understand how you feel, my H is busy cracking off to various porn things the minute I’m out the door 4 or 5 times a week. It’s very easy to say it’s no big deal- as a woman of 60 and not quite such a pretty young thing as I was (although not bad for my age) I really don’t like him even looking at me like a dog chasing a bone. Virtually all amateur and lesbian and I simply have lost any attraction he doesn’t know I know — I don’t think men realise not all women are remotely cool with frequent secretive use whether it’s teen or not“

What??!!
You know he’s doing this and you stay with him?
Why?

IdblowJonSnow · 21/02/2022 00:04

Hey op.
Sorry you're feeling low. He doesn't sound good for your mental health.
If you decide to split up sounds like it could be fairly straightforward as you aren't living together.
Take care.

LorelaiDeservedBetter · 21/02/2022 00:08

Tbh I think sticking a contract about porn use on a fridge is probably a sign that something isn't right Confused

He's using an industry that abuses children and participates in trafficking. I wouldn't want to be anywhere near him, regardless of what he wrote on a fridge.

legalseagull · 21/02/2022 07:04

[quote greasyshoes]@legalseagull

I'd have no reservations at all about calling police. What makes you think they're 18 if they look 13?! Because he says they are? Because the name of the film says they are? Call the police and boot his disgusting peado arse out

Pornographers generally won't employ under 18s, and risk all of the legal consequences, when there is absolutely no shortage of 20-somethings to act in their videos.

We don't know anything about the website, but genuine illegal pornography is mostly confined to the dark web. If the video has some kind of branding, or logo, then it's definitely not illegal.

I am surprised that someone with "legal" in their username is completely oblivious to the fact that almost all teen porn features non-teenage women.[/quote]
You think a logo means a site doesn't contain any illegal content? Confused

Anothergreatday · 21/02/2022 07:06

[quote greasyshoes]@legalseagull

I'd have no reservations at all about calling police. What makes you think they're 18 if they look 13?! Because he says they are? Because the name of the film says they are? Call the police and boot his disgusting peado arse out

Pornographers generally won't employ under 18s, and risk all of the legal consequences, when there is absolutely no shortage of 20-somethings to act in their videos.

We don't know anything about the website, but genuine illegal pornography is mostly confined to the dark web. If the video has some kind of branding, or logo, then it's definitely not illegal.

I am surprised that someone with "legal" in their username is completely oblivious to the fact that almost all teen porn features non-teenage women.[/quote]
The websites have repeatedly been caught with underage girls and video
Major websites
It’s been all over the news and in the courts

And regardless of even IF they are 18 they are MADE to look like children which is DIGUSTING

Any man who watches children should be jailed AND any man watching females made to LOOK like children is a filthy scumbag

Chocaholic9 · 21/02/2022 07:07

I'm sorry but I couldn't get past this. It's absolutely disgusting.

Anothergreatday · 21/02/2022 07:09

@greasyshoes

I am surprised that someone with "legal" in their username is completely oblivious to the fact that almost all teen porn features non-teenage women.’

Prove it!!

You can’t ! And everytime a man watches a so called ‘ teen ‘ he has ZERO way of knowing they are legal age . ZERO

Anothergreatday · 21/02/2022 07:13

@legalseagull
‘ You think a logo means a site doesn't contain any illegal content? confused’

The fact is that major websites have been caught with mountains of illegal stuff and every single one of them had logos etc

legalseagull · 21/02/2022 07:37

[quote Anothergreatday]@legalseagull
‘ You think a logo means a site doesn't contain any illegal content? confused’

The fact is that major websites have been caught with mountains of illegal stuff and every single one of them had logos etc[/quote]
Exactly.

greasyshoes · 21/02/2022 23:53

You think a logo means a site doesn't contain any illegal content?

Certainly not intentionally.

Please sit down and think about this properly. Branding makes a website and it's owners more visible, easier to trace etc. That's something you want if you want more people to visit your website, but anyone doing anything illegal will want to stay under the radar.

Swipe left for the next trending thread