Penis Envy

[incognitomode10]

This is an odd one, I just can't get my head around it. Bf & I are both in 40s, been together for over a year, both have DC from previous marriage/relationship.

He asked me a week ago if I had ever been with anybody with a large penis. I tried to evade to question, but he persisted, so I said yes, but actually it wasn't great.

Since then he's been cold and distant and said he needs time to "process the information" and now says that he can't get over it, so I think the relationship is over.

I don't understand what he's hoping for. That he will find a woman who hasn't been with a man with a large penis? How will he verify this? I hate how this situation is making me feel a bit - I don't know how to explain - like I've done something wrong...?!

He needs to process?!

So do you I'd say. What an idiot.

I thought you meant Freudian style Penis envy! I'm not sure I believe in that though. Once I dreamt I had a penis and I was like, offs, another thing to sort out.

Seriously? 😂 that’s so funny.

His insecurities are not your problem.

he came up with this on purpose, the "need to think about this" is fake.
he's smitten by another woman and is choosing this method to end the relationship.
you didn't to anything wrong.

If he's so busy thinking about another man's penis that he can't get past it, then he's got an awful lot of thinking to do - about his own preferences.

When asked by men about my penis experiences I just lie. Always. I see no benefit to the person I'm currently with or to me in telling the truth (which pretty much always is: yes I've been with a few who were bigger than you. Yes in some ways it was pretty memorable. Yes I occasionally think about that. No I don't want to be with any of those people.)

Having said that, it's not your fault he asked you and you told him part of the truth. I don't necessarily think the relationship is over; he may have told you the truth himself, ie that he's still processing it. Keep talking?

Life was simpler years ago ...
That’s all

Exactly! It's so bizarre that I'm thinking the only explanation must be that he's met someone else.

I tried to reassure him at the time about our sex life, how this previous person didn't mean anything, it was so many years ago etc. Objectively he has nothing to worry about in that department. But he says he can't stop picturing me having sex with this person!

It sounds like an excuse to end it?

Sounds like he watches a lot of porn.

He has some deeper seated issues, just live your life and ignore his bullshit. He created the problem, he can go ahead and solve it by dealing with his shit.

Honestly this is a joke, 😂😂

He sounds really tedious. Expect there are other red flags x

Tell him to man up, stop being so childish and get over it! 🙄

Oh dear this is my opinion as a man for what it's worth. I think any man or woman going in to a new relationship has to focus on someone's tomorrow's not their yesterday's.
Everybody's body is different, penis size like breast size, bottoms, legs will all vary from person to person. The OP's partner should never have asked the question if he didn't like or want the answer. The same as asking a partner how many people they've slept with, it's a no go area. Furthermore it just highlights his insecurities and has nothing to do with his partner.
The thought of other people doing the intimate things together in the past probably will enter people's minds but I think it's important to treat every relationship on its own merits.
If your fortunate enough to have a large penis then in all honesty you probably will have a natural advantage. However there's a lot to more to good sex than just your appendage one would hope. That would have to be a question for the ladies.
You can't get so far in to a relationship and then ask those questions. The same as a woman asking if your previous partner had large breasts and gave regular blow jobs everytime you had sex or if she did anal. And then turn round and say well I can't cope with that! Sad as it is your better off moving on.

😂😂😂 send him a link to an enlargement clinic.

Good riddance to this fucking idiot. You should be the one ending this, not him. You should never, ever speak to him again.

Perhaps he needs some psychotherapy?

@katepilar

Perhaps he needs some psychotherapy?

Who cares if he does? 🙄

Wtf. I'm amazed it's taken a year for this level of batshittery to emerge

Sounds like a red flag, I've been asked the same, I gave the same answer as you too. In my case he was also obsessed with the idea but there was a steady flow of questions, all which made me feel uncomfortable. He's now in my past and taken the title as the biggest penis I've been with, but not because of the size of his teeny peeny.

The red flag here is that he's making you feel bad for something he asked you to tell him. You've done nothing wrong and you don't need to justify/explain or apologise for any relationships/encounters you had previous to this lunatic.

Plenty more penises around, I hope you'll find a man without one on his head soon!

It should be you bringing this to an end, not him. Sounds like a right dickhead.

Exactly! It's so bizarre that I'm thinking the only explanation must be that he's met someone else.

Huh? That’s a bit of a reach!

Him - have you been with someone with a larger penis than me?
You - no!

You - do I look fat? Have you ever been with someone more attractive than me? Have you had tighter vaginas than mine?
Him - no!

Surely with certain questions you don’t tell the truth.
There’s being honest and then there’s being a decent partner and making them feel good about themselves.

If he said your vagina was looser than other women’s would it not make you feel a bit self conscious/upset even though you know he’s right?

Let him ‘process the information’ that you’re breaking up with him for being such a weirdo!

Wtf does he need to "process" this??

Fgs just get rid he sounds like a weirdo