Would you stay with your partner if they decided to transition?

[RedRobyn2021]

I'm watching an episode of Queer Eye where this transwoman's partner said they stayed with them after they decided they wanted to transition and it got me thinking

If your partner decided they wanted to transition would you stay with them?

The false suicide stats again? Dearie me.

It would be a hard no for me for may reasons - mainly the lies and deception plus I couldn't find my male partner pretending to be a woman attractive, it would be grotesque.

In your opinion

It's not an opinion. It's a fact. It's not possible to change sex.

I do beg you to do a little research into the lives of trans women and men. It’s not a Carry On film. Stuck on boobs, red lipstick etc

Do explain. What is a woman? And how does a born male demonstrate that they are now a woman? What signals do they give out to the world to signify this change?

I wouldn't become a TM and expect my male partner to accept penetrative sex from me, so why would I be expected to have sex with a man who identifies as a lesbian?
If he said he was suicidal if I left, that would be coercive sex?

Whether the suicide stats are true or false is irrelevant; no one should feel forced to remain in a relationship based on the threat of suicide if they leave. That alone is emotional abuse regardless of anything else.

And I don’t want to us enough if a reason to end any relationship.

Women, you owe noone a relationship, affection or sex. No one.

We've only been together a year. I've deliberately chosen a low drama but very physical relationship. I can't really imagine being the person to stay with him romantically through this. I think I'd stay a friend but I can imagine I'd become a reminder of the past he might not want to have around.

Absolutely not, but as we're both GC it's not likely to happen thank goodness.

For the ones that say they would stay, do you think your partner would stay if you transitioned? I've seen plenty of women say they'd stay but never any men.

And the attempt to blackmail women into staying with their partners after they transition by threatening suicide stats is disgusting. Let's see the suicide stats you're talking about. (If it's the one with something like 48% of trans people attempting suicide, it's been debunked as a very bad study with very limited participants.)

Gosh, this really made me think! And I don't know what I'd do at this stage.

In our 'younger years', no I absolutely wouldn't have stayed. I would have considered it a betrayal of all that we were and I don't think I could have gotten over it. But we're in our 60s now and retired. The companionship we have is a more important thing than it was 20 years ago when life was busier and more 'outward looking'. I don't know if I'd want to lose that.

He'd make one hell of an ugly woman, though.

No way.

Someone I know did stay when her husband transitioned to female. Married several years, no DC. They split two years later. She's just become engaged to a man.

Another one... She grabbed kids & moved back to her parents 1000km away, within the hour. Makes it VERY difficult for transitioned ex to see young DC & basically cut them off completely, immediately.

I don't believe it can't work long term with a hetero & trans unless it's gone into like this at the beginning, eyes wide open.

No, I find AGP repugnant.

No, I’d “help” them too - I’d sometimes unload the dishwasher and I’d look after the kids for half an hour one night a week whilst they went to yoga.

They would be massively greatful for my help and thank me profusely- and I’d regularly remind them how they got more help than most other women did

Sorry- that was in response to @CandyLeBonBon but I’ve messaged up the quote!

yeah nah

No.

I would stay and my partner would too.

Nope.

I do beg you to do a little research into the lives of trans women and men. It’s not a Carry On film. Stuck on boobs, red lipstick etc.

It's more the biology that interests me.
Man can't become women. They can choose to live in the way that they decide "woman" means to them, but that is living a societal construct, not changing sex.

I do beg you to do a little research into the lives of trans women and men. It’s not a Carry On film. Stuck on boobs, red lipstick etc.

I've done my research and it supports my findings that men who identify as trans are just a subset of men who present as a stereotype of a what a woman is. They have nothing in common with women.

@SomePosters

Can’t even read all the replies here

No wonder suicide rates are so high in the trans community

Op- it wouldn’t bother me, if I’m into you, I’m into you. We will find our ways to have our love together.

I would encourage them to take their time before doing anything permanent and have lots of therapy and communicate with 100% honestly with medical professionals

Get fucked. I have a friend whose ex used attempted suicide to coerce her into staying. Actually two! Women don’t need to be guilted into putting up with shitty men.

I do beg you to do a little research into the lives of trans women and men. It’s not a Carry On film. Stuck on boobs, red lipstick etc.

Research? Is this your first day?

@whymewhyme

I watched this episode and i really felt for the gf it just didn't feel geniune. It's probably just me though.

Me too @whymewhyme. I’m not sure where I sit with the whole transgender thing but not particularly critical of it in theory, and this particular relationship looked so forced and uncomfortable.

Hell. No.