Dating thread 222: into 2022 and beyond

[BelladiMamma]

The rules as a screenshot (feel free to copy and paste them in).

@Fitzroygurl10087 I think @ReturnOfTheBunk was spot on in her response, I doubt very much it was DIY related

@BelladiMamma
It’s okay, I got the message.

Thanks @ReturnOfTheBunk , I imagine that he is just hedging his bets and seeing other, seems like this is common place. I'm still tempted to send him a friendly follow up message and then if I don't hear back for that one then I'll call it a day. Thanks to all of you, this thread is great x

[quote FabulousMrFifty]@BelladiMamma
It’s okay, I got the message.[/quote]
Which one? Confused 🤷🏻‍♀️

If you mean you think @ButterflyOfShay or me don't want you to comment, you're wrong. We'd love you to stick around and keep learning, we all benefit from equal exchanges here.

(Sorry not actually speaking for @ButterflyOfShay I'm just assuming from her posts that's what she meant?)

@Ofalltheginjoints

I've taken the plunge and joined a couple of old sites, so far it's going ok, talking to a couple of people feels a gentle introduction only one negative person so far (parting comment was didn't realise you were a cripple, I'm sure he was a total charmer!)

Good luck 🤞🏽 with it all

@Fitzroygurl10087 I think you've had some great advice and also you seem to be doing the right thing, as you're not getting 'stuck' on him. Plenty of us have wasted time on irons when it wasn't going anywhere. Learn from our mistakes!

@StartingAgain6369 good to read that 2022 has started positively. It's such a head fuck all the festive things and the new year at once sometimes.

I've had a lovely weekend with MrD. We've met for dog walks and general mooching around and we got a little time alone together too. Things seemed to slot together nicely; he was down my way all weekend to see friends and family and we were able to just meld a few social times together without it feeling awkward. We've agreed that our next few times are going to be alone as we need to get back to the very important business of getting to know each other and canoodling.

Firmly on the smitten bench along with @Eesha

FWIW I took @FabulousMrFifty’s comment that was originally picked up on as just an expression of surprise that people analyse and deconstruct things in such detail. I find the deeper analysis a bit beyond me at times. Funnily enough I did the 16 types of personality test last night- prompted by my friend and for no deep or dating related issue. A couple of those questions are about how much you enjoy or engage in deeper analytical discussion and I really don’t. I struggled with it during my teaching career, preferring to do rather than hypothesise endlessly.
We’re all different. Some on the thread enjoy deconstructing the workings of the mind or the more complicated intricacies of human interaction with relation to dating. I’m usually more superficial or immediate in my needs. We’re all going to learn or take away what we choose to.

@Stepcount

Have you got a "I did the 16 types of personality test" link ?

@StartingAgain6369 isn't it just the Myers Briggs personality test?

Just en route back from Mr Musics place. It was all very idyllic as expected and I'm very happy. It always feels a bit anxious when I'm leaving as I panic whether this is it but he's been pretty amazing and chilled with it all.

www.16personalities.com/free-personality-test.

Yes, Myers Briggs @StartingAgain6369

@Eesha @BelladiMamma Sounds like fabulous weekends for you both, it's nearly making me want to go back on the apps but going to hold off for a while longer
.. Happy for you both and for all those on the smitten bench!
Had a realisation this weekend that while I have some great lifelong friends, we are at quite different life stages (I have teenagers, they have younger children) and we live quite far away so our meetups (while thoroughly enjoyable) are not very frequent. I'd love to make more friends. Any suggestions? Apologies it's not dating related!

@Stepcount & @Eesha

Thank you

I did one pre-internet days (yes I really am that old) just about to meet up with some friends for an evening walk so will give it a go when I get back home

[quote Startingover37]**@Eesha* @BelladiMamma* Sounds like fabulous weekends for you both, it's nearly making me want to go back on the apps but going to hold off for a while longer
.. Happy for you both and for all those on the smitten bench!
Had a realisation this weekend that while I have some great lifelong friends, we are at quite different life stages (I have teenagers, they have younger children) and we live quite far away so our meetups (while thoroughly enjoyable) are not very frequent. I'd love to make more friends. Any suggestions? Apologies it's not dating related![/quote]
I got friends through hobbies and work usually. Hobbies have included yoga, book clubs, writing groups, horse riding, hiking, netball. Always same sex friendships which is cool 😎

[quote Startingover37]**@Eesha* @BelladiMamma* Sounds like fabulous weekends for you both, it's nearly making me want to go back on the apps but going to hold off for a while longer
.. Happy for you both and for all those on the smitten bench!
Had a realisation this weekend that while I have some great lifelong friends, we are at quite different life stages (I have teenagers, they have younger children) and we live quite far away so our meetups (while thoroughly enjoyable) are not very frequent. I'd love to make more friends. Any suggestions? Apologies it's not dating related![/quote]
Also re the apps, you know I've been on a bit of a journey and have dated A LOT but it's helped me get a thicker skin and to focus in on what I've been looking for

Had an amazing first day of covid freedom down the beach it was soooo beautiful outside!! Very cute reading the happy updates today!! Lurrrve is in the air!! 💘💘

I just find it odd a man commenting to a woman on a predominantly female’s chat forum that they’re analysing too much/have too much to say? Yes it got my goat I concede! This is the one place we can come and have our say and learn from each other.

@ButterflyOfShay

Had an amazing first day of covid freedom down the beach it was soooo beautiful outside!! Very cute reading the happy updates today!! Lurrrve is in the air!! 💘💘

And the weather FINALLY improved!!

He he your comment about analysis. We women do love to chat and analyse ❤️ it's our thing ... awful generalisation I know ... but probably true

@BelladiMamma
I’m not feeling curmudgeonly, in fact quite enlightened.
On a post yesterday someone was expressing that their iron needed to be more this, that and the other, it dawned on me that previously I have been that iron, Ms Business especially, she used to tell me I needed to more forward, more assertive, and that’s just not me, so was that failed relationship really my fault?

The post from @ButterflyOfShay made me contemplate as well, why would my thinking be so different, why would things never my mind? Am I really that unthinking?

@BelladiMamma Thanks, I did find dating was a really good way to push me way out of my comfort zone too. It made me feel way more comfortable in myself and in what I want. It also was the first time in a long time, I saw myself as more than a mother and wanted to have fun for myself again. I just haven't met the right person to have that fun with yet!
I want to continue to build on my personal life too so that when I do meet someone, I have a solid social life outside of them. I do have friends from school, college, through work etc. I do have a few hobbies but just go for the class, no meeting/contact beyond that.
This thread is a great outlet for voicing all those thoughts and helping see things a bit clearer. I'm another overthinker!

[quote curmudgeonly007]@BelladiMamma
I’m not feeling curmudgeonly, in fact quite enlightened.
On a post yesterday someone was expressing that their iron needed to be more this, that and the other, it dawned on me that previously I have been that iron, Ms Business especially, she used to tell me I needed to more forward, more assertive, and that’s just not me, so was that failed relationship really my fault?

The post from @ButterflyOfShay made me contemplate as well, why would my thinking be so different, why would things never my mind? Am I really that unthinking?[/quote]
I think everyone is different and it's not necessarily a bad thing to not overanalyze everything and just be. I sometimes wish I didn't think so much! I think this thread is a great place to discuss these things and see things from a different point of view. It takes all types of make the world go round! 🌍

Beverage for my (kind of unconsciously) Dry January. Cadbury’s hot chocolate

Sorry @curmudgeonly007 @FabulousMrFifty if my post was a bit harsh this morning. Ms Business sounded like a bit of dick!

Mine… wine… of the duck variety!

Nice healthy background plant there @ButterflyOfShay 👍🏽

Thanks Bunk, I have about 40+ houseplants, they're all my babies 💚💚