Dating Thread 217: Is it burning bright or fizzling out?

[Heartbeats0708]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy.

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item

@Lemondrizzlegin it can feel daunting but just see it as everyone does it these days and you don't even have to commit to more than a drink to see if there's a spark. He might even be your last first date if you hit it off.

@Lemondrizzlegin Hello ! love your username my favourite cake and spirit rolled into one

Exactly what @Dazedandconfused10 has said, I normally do daytime coffee date zeros. It's natural to feel nervous, be yourself, don't over think and don't be frightened to leave like Dazed said

@Dazedandconfused10
Hope Mr 3rd time date shows tonight for you and it goes well

@Lemondrizzlegin
As others say, just go along with an open mind, it’s just a meet up to check each other out, he is probably feeling the same as you, if you don’t like him, just bail out after 30 mins,

Along with advice for @Lemondrizzlegin (hi and welcome!) is it just me who normally wants to bail after 30 minutes anyway as the whole thing is so terrifying?

Other than a very few exceptions, I always want to run away as soon as we've finished the first coffee. Doesn't mean I won't meet them again, I just hate the first meet. If that continues into the 2nd or 3rd then I bring it to a close, even if it's gone ok. Am I explaining myself well? Or not? Does that mean I should wait until there's an amazing chemistry eg MrA or an ok vibe eg MrTattoo and MrBear? And just ditch it if second meet still has me running for the hills even if on the surface every thing is fine?

@BelladiMamma @SpringlikeBunk I’m coming with you the opera! Eek 😍

I am complete locked into Spotify for the rest of my natural life due to my entire music collection being on there now 😭

@HairyArsedMan do you mix still?

[quote Shayelle2009]**@BelladiMamma* @SpringlikeBunk* I’m coming with you the opera! Eek 😍[/quote]
Woohoo! Have you bought the tickets yet?

@BelladiMamma yep! Just very cheap ones and doubt I’ll be able to see a thing but certainly be able to hear it 😆

@BelladiMamma have you bought yours?

@dancemom glad you had a nice date, and lovely - an engineer! I work with loads of them and they’re a good sort 🥰

@HairyArsedMan I love the way Goldie is still going so strong after so many years.

@SpringlikeBunk

LOL *@Shayelle2009 come join me and @BelladiMamma* if you like

(won't be the main thread night out though of course!)

Can't figure out how to do a DM from my mobile but all booked. It's a standing place so I won't be wearing heels 😄

Can't figure out how to do a DM from my mobile but all booked. It's a standing place so I won't be wearing heels 😄

I hear you, I hate wearing heels 👠

@Shayelle2009 and @BelladiMamma are proper gig people and going standing

@Shayelle2009 Goldie and I have mutual friends, he is not a nice person at all! Very mean in fact despite the TV persona

@Eesha Do you remember that he played a Bond villain ? He was a wrong ‘un there for sure.

@Shayelle2009 Have to confess, I’m trying to get the hang of digital turntables and have a little setup in the attic. Heavily invested in Spotify too but it’s tricky to get the music off there. Although it’s not technically difficult to get it off there but they can suspend you if they find you’re ripping tracks. They withdrew their integrations with Serato etc. last year. Apparently Deezer is a viable alternative.

Mr Engineer already trying to turn every chat towards sex 🙄

I find this so often with middle aged guys (no offence to the men on the thread, I'm not saying all men), late thirties early forties guys, it's like they have no other conversation topics. It's so unattractive and makes them seem really shallow. Have some substance and depth please men of the apps!

Unsure wether to just not reply or to tell him exactly why he's put me off ...

@dancemom I tend to tell them so but makes absolutely no difference. Some people are just prats when it comes to flirting/dating and go all in

@HairyArsedMan oh yes! Those teeth! He's not very nice to women unfortunately.

@FabulousMrFifty that’s not what I’ve heard

😬😬

Urgh @dancemom! Sorry to hear that. It’s disappointing, and soooo basic. NEXT!

@HairyArsedMan that sounds super cool! I’d love an attic den with decks and a chill out zone 😁! Soooo cool 🤩

@dancemom

Mr Engineer already trying to turn every chat towards sex 🙄

I find this so often with middle aged guys (no offence to the men on the thread, I'm not saying all men), late thirties early forties guys, it's like they have no other conversation topics. It's so unattractive and makes them seem really shallow. Have some substance and depth please men of the apps!

Unsure wether to just not reply or to tell him exactly why he's put me off ...

It’s funny that you think late 30’s is middle aged 😂😂

Just tell him the same as you put on here and see what happens, he will probably shove off, or come back with some comment.

Unfortunately that’s quite common ,

I recently read a really interesting article about the different dating behaviours between the genders and how those behaviours change over time and in reaction to supply of suitable partners

www.edge.org/response-detail/26747

One of the key take home points was, if your the parent of a boy, make sure he works hard and goes to Uni.

I did used to know a few djs and mcs and some were cool and normal and others up themselves. Way of the world I guess.

Thing is @FabulousMrFifty if @dancemom calls him on it likely he’ll get aggressive and abusive. Welcome to the world of OLD for women.

[quote Shayelle2009]@FabulousMrFifty that’s not what I’ve heard

😬😬[/quote]
Only at weekends, when I’m known as FabulousMrsFifty. 😂