To assume I've been dumped?

[WheatlandTerrier]

Seeing a guy since July. He's more open to relationships than me but we decided to make a go off it. Met each others families etc. We both had covid 2 weeks ago. He was worse than me so i didn't mind making most of the contact etc. However we've both been back out in the world for a week and it's me making most of the effort. I facetimed him last night to discuss it but he was with his daughter. I spoke to her quickly and he said he'd ring me once they were home and didn't. Am I dumped?

You are not dumped. You are liberated.

I've got a good morning text wtf is wrong with these people

It's horrible being out in this position. You were right to not run after him and maintain your expectations of how you should be treated in a relationship. I would probably hear him out though, it's tempting to cut and run but it might prey on your mind. I would agree to the meet up but at a time and place convenient to you. Then I'd hear him out, say goodbye and leave. I wouldn't agree to trial breakups, friendship or anything else.

@TheMooch

You are not dumped. You are liberated.

Yes!

Because he still had her number?!

@TheMooch

You are not dumped. You are liberated.

Love this!

If I were a betting woman I would say he is keeping you ticking over while he tries his luck with someone else.

Exactly what I thought glassogshloer

I’d say you are overthinking things.
He was busy so didn’t call you back, it doesn’t have to be a big deal.

He sent me a text saying I'm more or less dumped

@WheatlandTerrier

He sent me a text saying I'm more or less dumped

Deep breathe OP. Either don’t reply or a ‘ok, all the best.’

It’s a punch to the gut but you’ll be pleased you maintained dignity eventually.

The perfect occasion to respond with a "👍🏻" only.

@youvegottenminuteslynn

The perfect occasion to respond with a "👍🏻" only.

Good call

@youvegottenminuteslynn

The perfect occasion to respond with a "👍🏻" only.

This. Or nothing. Onward and upward.

What did he say?

Personally I think you need a conversation here. If he wants to end the relationship, surely you do need to know because assuming it's over and acting accordingly is also not that easy. Also, why should we all give men the green light to not bother ending relationships? You've met his family! Maybe it's just me.

He said he's overthinking everything and we need to talk. I texted back saying oh man dumping me over text and he said he doesn't know where he's at. So I'm meant to wait around?!?

Personally I think you need a conversation here.

I agree.

There definitely sounds like there’s a communication issue here.
Why don’t you just ring him and have a conversation.

How old are you both?

I have rang him twice this week to poor communication I won't do it again. We're both in our 30s

@WheatlandTerrier

He said he's overthinking everything and we need to talk. I texted back saying oh man dumping me over text and he said he doesn't know where he's at. So I'm meant to wait around?!?

Doesn't know where he's at?

Cheeky bastard. He's not going to officially say dumped, in the hope you'll still be in the background when he feels like it. But he's got no loyalty or commitment to you.

Ignore him, ignore all his future "good morning" bullshit that's just trying to keep you available on his terms. If you must send something, as PP, "all the best", but personally, silence is more dignified.

He didn't dump you over text though, he said you need to talk. Forcing him to have this sort of conversation over text is a recipe for a self-fulfilling prophesy, whatever his current thoughts are.

Well I'm now single in my mind so it's time to do what I want.

@WheatlandTerrier

He said he's overthinking everything and we need to talk. I texted back saying oh man dumping me over text and he said he doesn't know where he's at. So I'm meant to wait around?!?

No this time you block his number don't give him headspace at least if you block you won't be tempted to respond

I feel like this guy can’t win! He’s not ghosting you - he’s saying he’s OVERthinking things and wants to speak to you. We criticise men when they don’t talk about their feelings, and then when they do! I feel like your fear of abandonment and reluctance to believe that this could be a real relationship is sabotaging things.

I mean, ignore him if you want, but personally I think it lets men off lightly and will leave you wondering what went wrong anyway, however detetmined you are to be dignified.