Can anyone help me understand what my partners thought process is on this please

[Flia42]

I’ll try and explain this as best I can. I am fully awaiting the ‘man child’ ‘sulky’ responses..but all joking aside there is genuinely something not right..

So at the weekend partner and I were going to make a recipe. We woke on Saturday and the convo went like this..

Him: ‘can we make xxx’
Me: ‘we can but we’re short on (ingredient) and will need to go and get some more’
Him: ‘oh ok’

He stand there and looks really fed up. I wasn’t overly concerned as he’s acted like this before but this as far as I’ve known him is a minor thing to get ??? over.
So I look at him and ask him if he’s ok..he reply’s yes but I’m a clearly disappointed tone.
I say ‘are you upset because we haven’t got the right ingredients? He replied yes.

I explained to him, like I would have to do to a young child that all we needed was to go to the shop, get the thing and then we could make. As soon as I’d spelt that out on those simple terms he seemed fine.

Now honestly, that’s not right for a 45 yr old man is it?! What is it?? What makes him become so internally disappointed that I have to try and make him understand what the (to me) simple plan is?!

It’s driving me mad?? Anyone I’d love to try and help him

I don't know any one, or any men in my life, who have this kind of behaviour.

@WhoIsPepeSilva I totally agree with what you’re saying. I am stupid for not thinking he’d do this again. I actually cannot believe he is but that’s by the by.
I’ll be honest I’m in shock, shock because I love him, shock because his last messaged said he lived me, and I know he does..but he doesn’t to treat me like this. He’s a child deep down and As much as I could have dealt with spelling out the obvious this end result is what’s important.

I told him on Friday I’d had enough. He said he knew. Maybe I’m taking that was we’re done. What else is there to say? I’ve tried reasoning/understanding in the past, pointless,

You're done. Move on.

You're not stupid love, you just thought he was a normal decent person and it turns out he's not.

Unfortunately when people tell you they love you and then treat you badly it really means that they don't love you. They love being able to control you.

I think you need to firm up on what you want here. Maybe you're done? Do you want to be done or do you think you could be talked round?

I get it, I went back to my exH after we split because I let myself be talked round. I just wanted it to work. He used it as an excuse to break out the shite behaviours again. Sometimes we need the final nail in the relationship coffin and that's ok, just be wary because it still hurts.

Us lot on the outside can see it easier because we are outside of the situation. For you it's a lot harder to find clarity but you'll get there

My ex told me he loved me and was "gutted" without me but he didn't hesitate to stonewall me for WEEKS or curse me out over text.

Trust me words are so easy to say for some people but actions really show how much they care.

What a loser, I would have to give him a bloody good shake!

Thanks @WhoIsPepeSilva I know you’re right. I’m going to send a message clarifying we’re done later. I’ve tried, he’s shown me who he is. Silence to me = not giving a shit.
@sunnyzweibrucken you’re right, where’s
the actions at the moment?! Sigh

You'll be alright Flia42 if in doubt MN is always here for you.

Don't ever put up with being made to feel like crap by someone else's actions, that's not what you are on the planet for. There are people who will treat you with the mutual love and respect you deserve so don't accept anything less.

@baileys6904

Thank fuck my OH doesn't post on here when I open the treat cupboard and there's no ripples.... I'd imagine I'd have a similar tone

Me too, I'm a right pain and send my lovely husband to the shops.