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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

What’s the most bizarreness thing you’ve been told by your abusive partner?

118 replies

Fightingback16 · 09/07/2021 18:26

I remember today my ex husband who was emotionally abusive paid for someone to remotely cleanse (300 miles away) our house from all the bad energy causing me to be a shit wife.

When I opened the envelope with the findings a shit loads of confetti fell out.

7 years later and I’m cracking up at the bonkersness of it all.

OP posts:
FootieFever22 · 09/07/2021 19:19

Well he sounds like a sane individual.

Could you give me his number, I'll remotely cleanse his current house for the right fee.

Original poster
Fightingback16 · 09/07/2021 19:27

Yeah £350 it cost….bloody good business idea and can work from home!

OP posts:
AliceMcK · 09/07/2021 19:55

I was too shot and something about my boobs being too big… I can’t remember the actual conversation but it was apparently my fault I was so short and couldn’t reach high places making his life so hard and according to him incompatible. Also I had too much boob, his hands weren’t big enough for them. Ironically his next partner was shorter than me and had fucking massive tits 🤔

Willwebebuyingnumber11 · 09/07/2021 19:58

Had my head down the toilet being sick and he pulled me out by my hair and threw me down the stairs.
It was my fault of course; he hates the smell of sick and I should’ve known this! He was so upset I got him so angry Hmm

Probably not the most bizarre but I will never forget that night.

MsTSwift · 09/07/2021 19:58

An ex boyfriend in my twenties once called told me a gold digger which was odd as I had a good professional job and he was unemployed and living in his parents basement and I had to send him cash to buy a train ticket to visit me. If I was a gold digger I was an utterly rubbish one!

BillyShears · 09/07/2021 19:59

That I had been loved too much in my life (by family) and had therefore come to expect too much by way of love because I had been spoilt by it. It had made me a worse person and arrogant because I expected everyone to love me as a result of all that love. My family are just normal. We do love each other- as is usual but it’s not like my childhood was a John and Yoko love-in.

He was totally loopy, as is probably clear.

BuffySummersReportingforSanity · 09/07/2021 20:01

@MsTSwift

An ex boyfriend in my twenties once called told me a gold digger which was odd as I had a good professional job and he was unemployed and living in his parents basement and I had to send him cash to buy a train ticket to visit me. If I was a gold digger I was an utterly rubbish one!
I'm sure he was firmly of the opinion that his cock was solid gold.
IslandGirl5 · 09/07/2021 20:03

God where to start! My ex once threw me to the floor by my hair because I wanted to take him away to his favourite staycation place for his birthday but couldn’t drive at the time so shared my plans with him before booking so I could make sure he was happy to drive… but obviously him driving wasn’t fair. He also got me by the back of the neck while doing the dishes and shoved my head over the sink because he found out I knew his ex moved abroad and didn’t tell him… what wonderful men we’ve all been with

Babyfg · 09/07/2021 20:05

That if I didn't give him what he wanted, I was forcing him to be deceitful and it was my fault what he would do next. I actually laughed in his face for once that he was so serious about this!

Original poster
Fightingback16 · 09/07/2021 20:10

Ok another he bought a book about drinking your own wee and the Heath benefits … mine was seriously messed up but I did not ever tell him that.

OP posts:
30degreesandmeltinghere · 09/07/2021 20:12

That the dc I went on to have with another man was disabled because I was evil. Told our dc this also. They were scared to meet their new sibling...

Tiari · 09/07/2021 20:15

My ex told my therapist that I MADE him hit me.
Therapist said very slowly, thoughtfully "Hmm, Tiari must be a very very powerful person to MAKE you hit her"
Ex was fuming Grin

Original poster
Fightingback16 · 09/07/2021 20:15

Oh yeah I was told our daughters allergy to sesame was because of “our” toxic relationship…hmmm no…and no abusive not toxic twat!

OP posts:
Kevinbaconsrealwife · 09/07/2021 20:17

Mine literally screamed and screamed at me because I walked the Race For Life , not ran it ....never mind the £500 I raised...just one of many , many bonkers incidents with an ex from long ago....

user1471442488 · 09/07/2021 21:48

My ex was a psycho who made my life a living hell. Things I got shouted at for:

Petting the dog (the movement annoyed him)
Reading magazines (the noise of the pages turning annoyed him)
Being breathless when I had a chest infection (the sound annoyed him)

Can you see a pattern? One day he slammed his coffee cup down on the table and screamed at me because I scratched my face.

He has no friends and his family hate him and I hope he lives a lonely life.

irishoak · 09/07/2021 21:52

Screaming at me that I was a liar and a monster because when our marriage counsellor asked how I was at the start of the session, I replied that I was not too bad, and didn't tell her that I had a UTI. Waited until after the session to scream, of course. Hmm he thought I didn't like her because she agreed with his side of things, what he doesn't know is that I saw her alone once and she pretty much told me that I should leave as soon as possible.

Also raging and shouting at me about how awful a specific TV show is, how he knows the writer is rubbish and the show does this specific thing and that specific thing and I should realise how shit it is... He's never watched it, but he didn't like it when I pointed that out. That one just boggles my mind still, the righteous anger he was full of, going on and on about something he's never watched, but I have.

AnxiousWeirdo · 09/07/2021 21:53

That I lied about a bloke in a hospital carpark being abusive to me and my 6 yr old DD (had to get security to escort us about and he almost ran us over 3 times) to cover up a parking ticket I didn't get and he knew I didn't get after he made up the story in his head but still stood by it.

LegArmpits · 09/07/2021 22:00

When I started seeing a new boyfriend (now husband), my ex told me that he was trouble and living in the Big Yellow Storage Unit 🤣🤣

Pebbledashery · 09/07/2021 22:02

Most Oscar winning performance was my ex came up to me after a significant assault on me and said he was sick of the abusive treatment from me and that he'd had enough of being abused and the crocodile tears started.. He was obviously recording the conversation on his phone.. All I did was clap very slowly and told him he deserved an Oscar for that performance.

Pebbledashery · 09/07/2021 22:04

My ex also screamed at me in a well known fast food chain for letting someone go in front of me whilst I was waiting for my order which wasn't ready... It warranted being called a mug and then not spoken to for several days..
Still don't understand it.

Wherediditgo · 09/07/2021 22:09

One of my ex’s used to call me when out to tell me he was coming home soon.
Then come back in the early hours, delete the record of the phone call he made to me and then claimed I was imagining it.

Some of these are awful. You poor women Flowers

Journeynotdestination · 09/07/2021 22:13

That I was the abuser - after he threw me 10ft out of the door onto the ground.

Chillychili · 09/07/2021 22:25

Some of these are horrible. This isn’t the worst he did but the most bizarre… I was rushed to a hospital several hours away due to a huge bleed caused by a tumour. I was terrified, the dr who checked me in when I got there was nice calm and reassuring. I smiled. I was apparently flirting with him, a whore ect ect

While having chemotherapy for the cancer I had really bad sickness, I was sick 4 times an hour for 3 days every week. He accused me of making myself sick to lose weight.

goatmermaid · 09/07/2021 22:31

came home to find he had emptied the bin all over the living room floor he was piecing together bits of paper that somehow proved I was having an affair. .He spent hours doing this. They were just random bits that didn't even go together. He also ate a wine glass one night....that was my fault as well

Nonmaquillee · 09/07/2021 22:31

Some of these are horrifying, I am so sorry for you all.
Had a narc ex who told me it was MY fault that he lost his temper and ranted and ranted at me. He simply couldn’t be reasoned with. He wasn’t physically abusive but an absolute mindfuck.

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