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Original poster

What would you think/do if partner said this: sex related?

130 replies

again2020 · 12/05/2021 13:37

Posting here for traffic rather than in sex.

Within the last 6 months partner has said the following to me:

"You're a bit loose 'down there'" (I have a DD, natural birth)

"You don't deserve oral sex anymore"

They did hurt me. We've had a bumpy ride during the past year and a bit (like many couples). We do have sex maybe once a fortnight/month. He isn't well endowed. I'm open about sex toys and was thinking about suggesting something but he is 'vanilla' and I think he wouldn't take it well 😔

Any advice?

OP posts:
LaBellina · 12/05/2021 15:38

If dumping him now is not an option, at least start planning/ working towards your ‘escape’ often things that falling into place then. This man is an abuser and this relationship is doomed if the respect is gone.
He is a vile, vile man and doesn’t deserve to ever have sex with anyone again after treating the mother of his child like this.
He is a misogynistic twat that deserves to be dumped.

MizMoonshine · 12/05/2021 15:39

I can't believe you're even asking about this.
Of course you've loosened up after having a baby.
And you don't deserve oral from him.

You need to make more of an effort.

You should look at the sex toy avenue. Go and buy something sexy, set the scene, go down on him...

Then bite his knob off while you're down there. Throw him out of your house and have a night of enjoyment with your new sex toys.

You don't deserve to have that cretin even look at your pussy, never mind touch it.

You need to make more of an effort to not be with such a trashbag of a man.

Honestly. Tell him he has a small cock, too.

MizMoonshine · 12/05/2021 15:40

I can't believe you're even asking about this.
Of course you've loosened up after having a baby.
And you don't deserve oral from him.

You need to make more of an effort.

You should look at the sex toy avenue. Go and buy something sexy, set the scene, go down on him...

Then bite his knob off while you're down there. Throw him out of your house and have a night of enjoyment with your new sex toys.

You don't deserve to have that cretin even look at your pussy, never mind touch it.

You need to make more of an effort to not be with such a trashbag of a man.

Honestly. Tell him he has a small cock, too.

Jcre · 12/05/2021 15:43

Have you tried telling him he's a bit tiny down there?

MizMoonshine · 12/05/2021 15:47

I can't believe you're even asking about this.
Of course you've loosened up after having a baby.
And you don't deserve oral from him.

You need to make more of an effort.

You should look at the sex toy avenue. Go and buy something sexy, set the scene, go down on him...

Then bite his knob off while you're down there. Throw him out of your house and have a night of enjoyment with your new sex toys.

You don't deserve to have that cretin even look at your pussy, never mind touch it.

You need to make more of an effort to not be with such a trashbag of a man.

Honestly. Tell him he has a small cock, too.

notacooldad · 12/05/2021 15:51

*What would Ithink if my partner said that to me?
I would wonder where my real Dh had gone and who was this dick head being rude, hurtful and disrespectful in his place.
After our kids and all our years together Dh has never uttered anything hurtful about our sex life. In fact he has never said anything hurtful at all.
Your partner is nasty.
You deserve better than this.

Original poster
again2020 · 12/05/2021 15:53

@Jcre I haven't...it would just cause more problems. I'm sure he knows Blush

OP posts:
notacooldad · 12/05/2021 15:55

What would Ithink if my partner said that to me?
I would wonder where my real Dh had gone and who was this dick head being rude, hurtful and disrespectful in his place.
After our kids and all our years together Dh has never uttered anything hurtful about our sex life. In fact he has never said anything hurtful at all.
Your partner is nasty.
You deserve so muc

wingsnthat · 12/05/2021 15:59

He’s entitled to say no, but as are you. I wouldn’t touch him with a barge pole.

Now that you want to leave, just sort yourself out with said toys until you go

wingsnthat · 12/05/2021 16:02

He’s entitled to say no, but as are you. I wouldn’t touch him with a barge pole.

Now that you want to leave, just sort yourself out with said toys until you go

bubblebath62636 · 12/05/2021 16:06

So what if you have a mortgage and a child?

You've be fucking mad to continue living with this prick and his tiny penis.

MrsTerryPratchett · 12/05/2021 16:30

Does he have to 'deserve' blowjobs?

CombatBarbie · 12/05/2021 16:33

Oh OP there are other options regardless of mortgage and children. This is 2021...

In the meantime I'd be buying myself a tracy's dog and if he mentions it just say no offence but as I'm a bit loose I can't feel your small dick and I don't take kindly to blackmail for oral.... This bad boy does two in 1......

SpeedRunParent · 12/05/2021 17:22

@Nonmaquillee

"I can't even feel you inside me"

"You're not remotely hard enough, feels really spongey"

"Reminds me of a chipolata"

Then I would leave him

😂😂😂
bigbaggyeyes · 12/05/2021 17:25

You're loose down there - must be the size of your cock

You don't deserve it - ok then get up and get dressed

Seriously, kids or mortgage aren't a good enough reason to put up with that kind of shit

RUOKHon · 12/05/2021 17:27

I’d think he was a cunt with a small penis who was shit in bed.

Miasicarisatia · 12/05/2021 17:28

he knows exactly what he is doing, he knows your self esteem is low and you'd laugh in his face and dump him if you were the confident version of yourself
he doesnt deserve the effort it's taken you to post this thread, but since you have.... just bin the little prick

osbertthesyrianhamster · 12/05/2021 17:30

Any advice? Yes, make this person an ex. He's negging you to erode your self-esteem so he can control you more. Classic abuse technique. Fuck that and not his small dick. I would not be having sex with him again.

Miasicarisatia · 12/05/2021 17:35

He isn't well endowed
so, micro penis, or normal small?

LalalalalalaLand123 · 12/05/2021 17:37

He insults you in a very hurtful, personal way - why are you still with him? The hills are that way - run OP

SpeedRunParent · 12/05/2021 17:37

There is never a time when finishing a bad relationship isn't possible. Please don't tell yourself otherwise.

He is being vicious. That type of nastiness doesn't happen in healthy relationships.

I'd tell him to fuck off now but, at the very least, you need to kick him into touch and call his behaviour out for the wholly unacceptable display that it was.
There's nothing good ahead for your relationship if you let this pass.

JorisBonson · 12/05/2021 17:38

I would think he was a grade a wanker and he would be fucked off sharpish.

seekingadvice23 · 12/05/2021 17:42

@again2020

Posting here for traffic rather than in sex.

Within the last 6 months partner has said the following to me:

"You're a bit loose 'down there'" (I have a DD, natural birth)

"You don't deserve oral sex anymore"

They did hurt me. We've had a bumpy ride during the past year and a bit (like many couples). We do have sex maybe once a fortnight/month. He isn't well endowed. I'm open about sex toys and was thinking about suggesting something but he is 'vanilla' and I think he wouldn't take it well 😔

Any advice?

What a prick! You deserve to feel loved and wanted, not to be spoken to like that!
DrSbaitso · 12/05/2021 17:48

[quote again2020]@aiwblam Glad you asked that! No, due to financial reasons my family have basically told me to stay put until DD is older.[/quote]
Well they can shag the shitbag then.

You always have a choice, OP. Might be hard, but it's a choice.

At the very least, you sure don't need to keep sleeping with him.

YouJustDoYou · 12/05/2021 18:51

Well you're not going to leave him so you either put up with it or somehow get the fucking abusive shit head to change.