New neighbour wants me to be friends with his wife

[AlTempleton]

New neighbours moved in a few months ago. I saw the husband not long after they had moved in and we introduced ourselves and exchanged pleasantries.

I didn't meet his wife for a while, but then about a month ago I was cleaning my car and they both came out with their baby and came over to introduce the wife. He did all the talking - told me her name, that she's a SAHP, she doesn't know anyone here - and she stood there nodding and smiling as he spoke, but not actually saying anything herself. He explained her English is limited but she'd love to make some friends, she's very lonely at home alone when he's out at work, and that I should go round for tea with her once restrictions are over. I said something noncommittal like "that's very kind" and left it at that and didn't think anything more of it.

However I've just bumped into him again, this time on his own, while I was coming back from walking my dog, and he reminded me about having tea with his wife and reiterated again how lonely she is. He also said we can go in each other's gardens from next week. I said something like, oh well work's very full on at the moment but thanks, that's very nice of you.

I have a feeling now though that he's not going to drop it and that he's got me lined up to be a friend for his lonely wife. This is probably really mean of me, but I just don't want to. I'm working full time and I have a generally busy life, but also I just don't want the pressure of being the person who has to resolve this stranger's loneliness. I've only met her that once when he brought her out to meet me, but I have bumped into him loads of times as he's gone out to work, gardening or he's going for a run. I only ever see her sat at her living room window staring out. It feels like I've been earmarked to resolve the issue of her never going out.

I want to very politely shut this down as I don't want to have to vaguely keep saying things like "work is full on at the moment" every time he brings it up because I think that's not going at stop him asking me, particularly when restrictions are lifted.

Any ideas please? (Or am I just a horrible person??)

There you go OP, you absolute cow bag with your flowers and invitations to tea. Whadda bitch

I'm afraid I am in the daffodil-less corner too but I do have a large array of alternatives for your consideration -
⚘🌼🌷🌸🌻💮🌺🌹🏵🥀💐🌾

@FortunesFavour

There you go OP, you absolute cow bag with your flowers and invitations to tea. Whadda bitch

Thank you for your lovely words. They brought a tear to my eye.

Have a tulip 🌷

I like the cut of your jib OP

@MiddlesexGirl

I'm afraid I am in the daffodil-less corner too but I do have a large array of alternatives for your consideration - ⚘🌼🌷🌸🌻💮🌺🌹🏵🥀💐🌾

Thank you. I'm sorry about your daffodil-less state but your alternatives are glorious. Here's a tulip 🌷

Why did the neighbour say no thank you to the daffs and the offer of tea/cake?

@AlTempleton

OP do come back and give us an update

Ha ha do you think I'm a masochist?? I mean, I know I said I would, but that was two days ago when I still had a thread of humour left in me. I woke up to about 25 emails from MN this morning with all the tagging and updates. After this thread reaches its 1000 posts I'm having a digital detox and perhaps some intense therapy I'm never coming on here again!

Hi OP. You might be able to turn notifications to OFF (under settings) which should stop your email account being overrun with emails when you are tagged?

After that just hide the thread. There's a little eye icon with a diagonal line through it I think? I'm using the App but may be a bit different for you - but worth a try? Also for you!! 🌹

@FortunesFavour

I like the cut of your jib OP

I like yours too

🌷🍰

OP I like running, dogs, 🌼 , cake (including coffee cake) and not reading the fucking thread.

*Hi OP. You might be able to turn notifications to OFF (under settings) which should stop your email account being overrun with emails when you are tagged?

After that just hide the thread. There's a little eye icon with a diagonal line through it I think? I'm using the App but may be a bit different for you - but worth a try? Also daffodildaffodildaffodildaffodildaffodil for you!! 🌹*

Oh thank you. I did hide the thread but didn't know that about the notifications - I'll do that.

Of course, once I saw the emails, being the vain, awful person that I am, I couldn't resist seeing what was being said about me

Maybe thats where you went wrong? They didn’t want daffodils, they wanted little vaginas on stalks? Perhaps you need to up your flower game....

@Whycantibetangy

Maybe thats where you went wrong? They didn’t want daffodils, they wanted little vaginas on stalks? Perhaps you need to up your flower game....

I've not got any vaginas on stalks growing in my garden 🌷

@tinkerbellvspredator

Thank you - have a vagina on a stalk 🌷

Here is a great recipe for choc chip cookies which I found on here (200 g of choc chips though I’d say 😬)

110g/4oz unsalted butter, softened
110g/4oz golden caster sugar
110g/4oz light muscovado sugar
1 egg
1 tsp vanilla essence
170g/6oz plain flour
½ tsp baking powder
¼ tsp salt
150g/5oz chocolate, cut into small chunks

Preheat the oven to 190C/375F/Gas 5.
Beat the butter together with the sugar. ith a fork beat the egg together with the vanilla essence and add this to the butter mixture.
In a bowl, mix together the flour, baking powder and salt. Add this to the butter and egg mixture and blend well. Mix in the chunks of chocolate
Make the cookies: line four baking sheets with non-stick baking paper.
Using your hands, form the dough into walnut-sized balls and arrange on the baking sheets spaced well apart.
Bake in the oven for 10 minutes. Allow to cool for a few minutes and then transfer to a wire rack.
🌼🌼🌼🌼🌼

Of course, once I saw the emails, being the vain, awful person that I am, I couldn't resist seeing what was being said about me.

Ordinary, normal human I'd have said! 🤗🌹

@Bouny

Here is a great recipe for choc chip cookies which I found on here (200 g of choc chips though I’d say 😬)

110g/4oz unsalted butter, softened
110g/4oz golden caster sugar
110g/4oz light muscovado sugar
1 egg
1 tsp vanilla essence
170g/6oz plain flour
½ tsp baking powder
¼ tsp salt
150g/5oz chocolate, cut into small chunks

Preheat the oven to 190C/375F/Gas 5.
Beat the butter together with the sugar. ith a fork beat the egg together with the vanilla essence and add this to the butter mixture.
In a bowl, mix together the flour, baking powder and salt. Add this to the butter and egg mixture and blend well. Mix in the chunks of chocolate
Make the cookies: line four baking sheets with non-stick baking paper.
Using your hands, form the dough into walnut-sized balls and arrange on the baking sheets spaced well apart.
Bake in the oven for 10 minutes. Allow to cool for a few minutes and then transfer to a wire rack.
🌼🌼🌼🌼🌼

They sound delicious. I'll make these for my garden guests this weekend. Oh, wait ....

🌷🌷🌷🌷

Oh dear, I can't unsee that now! The daffodil is in my emoticons list, but I didn't get a tulip.

Sorry, my quote didn't work... can't unsee the tulip vagina.

Having been ‘the wife’ in this situation, imagine it would be so nice for her to have a contact. You don’t have to be ‘friends’ and have weekly coffee mornings and Tupperware parties. Just have 1 cup of tea with her, let her know you’re always around if she needs you. Honestly, No one likes being forced into a friendship and she is probably feeling awkward and cringey about it all too.... but she will also massively appreciate the effort and kindness.
The husband is being a bit pushy but he loves his wife and is trying to help her. I think your desire to shut it down is a bit unkind and unneighbourly. She lives in your community and is trying to integrate. Be kind.

@DartmoorDoughnut

That's very generous of you. Here's a tulip 🌷

@BuiltForComfortNotForSpeed

Sorry, my quote didn't work... can't unsee the tulip vagina.

Have some more vaginas on stalks 🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷

@Whatamess582

Having been ‘the wife’ in this situation, imagine it would be so nice for her to have a contact. You don’t have to be ‘friends’ and have weekly coffee mornings and Tupperware parties. Just have 1 cup of tea with her, let her know you’re always around if she needs you. Honestly, No one likes being forced into a friendship and she is probably feeling awkward and cringey about it all too.... but she will also massively appreciate the effort and kindness. The husband is being a bit pushy but he loves his wife and is trying to help her. I think your desire to shut it down is a bit unkind and unneighbourly. She lives in your community and is trying to integrate. Be kind.

🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷