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Original poster

To Have Never Orgasmed!

146 replies

Lady08 · 20/02/2021 09:57

How common is this?
I’ve been married for over 10 years and I’m in my 30’s and it’s never happened for me.
I couldn’t post on the sex forum because I need to be a member for at least 3 months.

OP posts:
SoulofanAggron · 22/02/2021 11:56

@Lady08 I just bought OMGyes, which some PP's mentioned. www.omgyes.com/ It looks interesting, lots to experiment with.

SoulofanAggron · 22/02/2021 12:49

Also on OMGyes, I don't want to be indelicate, but there are a lot of video clips of women 'demonstrating their techniques' on themselves. I imagine watching these could be fun for those for which it's their taste in viewing. Smile

Fabiofatshaft · 22/02/2021 15:23

Sounds like a communication issue as much as anything. If he’s sulking or not paying your clit much attention, no wonder you have self sexual confidence and realisation issues.

I, when making love to my partner, if I don’t kiss, lick, gently caress her clit, ( Unless she says, ‘ harder ‘ ), for a more than reasonable amount of time, SHE sulks for ages !!!!

Oops TMI

Thisisworsethananticpated · 22/02/2021 15:29

Op
Google orgasmic mediation and the technique
Try it on yourself
It’s a technique that is almost guaranteed

justanotherneighinparadise · 22/02/2021 15:35

One of the best lovers I had was actually a really sweet, shy, anxious person in every day life. In the bedroom though he was a complete animal!! It was very shocking. Still don’t really understand how personality equates to sex but I’d agree if they’re selfish and arrogant in everyday life they are probably selfish and arrogant in terms of their own pleasure.

LimitIsUp · 22/02/2021 15:37

OP I think honeybobbin might have been alluding to the fact that it is unusual for women to refer to other women as 'females'. that's more likely to be said by a man

agreyersky · 22/02/2021 15:56

Still don’t really understand how personality equates to sex

Because I've found that men don't leave their personalities at the bedroom door.

but I’d agree if they’re selfish and arrogant in everyday life they are probably selfish and arrogant in terms of their own pleasure

Yeah, that's my point Grin

IndigoJewel · 22/02/2021 16:10

Honestly my ex was a liar, a cheat, had no morals and was generally awful. But God he was good in bed. His technique and oral skills were amazing, he was really generous in bed !! However most recent ex was the opposite, absolutely lovely in general, very thoughtful and caring, would go out of his way for you. But clueless in the bedroom, and no amount of talking or showing him helped. He hated giving oral, and was intimidated by toys. I really don't think you can tell what someone is like in bed judging by their character. At least certainly not in my experience!

Original poster
Lady08 · 22/02/2021 16:32

@LimitIsUp - I was referring to the porn that a poster asked if I watched. Meaning I occasionally watch the porn ‘Made by females, for females.’

OP posts:
agreyersky · 22/02/2021 16:32

Well then we have had different experiences..

Furrybutts · 22/02/2021 16:36

Op, I was 43 before I had my first orgasm.
Even now I can only do it alone.

As pp's have said, you need a wand, some lube and to be totally relaxed.
Don't be aiming for the big O, just enjoy the sensations and eventually it will happen.

Tootsies · 22/02/2021 16:40

I had never achieved O through PIV before my current DP. He gets me there every single time we have sex. He blows my mind sexually. Before him, I often couldn’t be bothered to even engage in sexual relations most of the time. These days I’m keen to have sex on a daily basis (although his sex drive isn’t as high as mine) Grin

Original poster
Lady08 · 22/02/2021 22:52

@Fabiofatshaft - It’s not easy to communicate unfortunately, he would likely take it as a criticism.
It’s good to see you have the needs of your partner at the forefront.

OP posts:
Original poster
Lady08 · 22/02/2021 22:53

@Thisisworsethananticpated - Thanks, will have a look Smile

OP posts:
Fabiofatshaft · 23/02/2021 00:13

@Lady08

Totally agree.

My perception is, if a man tells a woman she’s lacking in the bedroom department, she’d be mortified, hurt, and her confidence would take a hit....... Generally ( Or she might tell him to GFH )

But if a woman tells a man he’s lacking in the bedroom, he takes it as a personal attack, and starts a rant..... Generally

See my post on ranting Smile

Sunflower1970 · 23/02/2021 00:42

Keep trying. It’s a shame you are missing out. As other posters said have a bath, get relaxed under the duvet, fantasize, a bit of lube and get exploring!!

SoulofanAggron · 23/02/2021 00:55

I had never achieved O through PIV before my current DP. He gets me there every single time we have sex. He blows my mind sexually. Before him, I often couldn’t be bothered to even engage in sexual relations most of the time. These days I’m keen to have sex on a daily basis (although his sex drive isn’t as high as mine)

@Tootsies Awww Smile Glad you hit the jackpot. What do you think he does differently to the other guys? Is it 'just' keeping going for longer?

SoulofanAggron · 23/02/2021 00:57

It’s not easy to communicate unfortunately, he would likely take it as a criticism.

@Lady08 He doesn't sound like the best of men to be honest. How is life with him in general?

Bouledeneige · 23/02/2021 01:03

I didn't orgasm at all till I was in my mid 40s and divorced. I did get pleasure out of sex but felt I never really got to the top of the hill. My XH had a small penis and wasn't really very sensitive or seasoned as a lover.

But in my relationships after divorce I was really liberated by meeting people who had honed their craft or wanted to give me pleasure and I felt much freer. I started to enjoy all aspects really and found what I liked and didn't like. With vibrators, oral and everything else. It was quite an adventure.

(Not that I'm bothered now....)

namitynamechange · 23/02/2021 01:13

I came on to reccomend the womaniser and saw others have before me. Game changer. Honestly.

Original poster
Lady08 · 23/02/2021 01:15

@Fabiofatshaft - Males and females are definitely wired differently (no pun intended Smile)
A lot of it depends how you approach the situation, I am thinking about careful wording but whilst also getting my point across.

@SoulofanAggron - We do have quite a strained marriage, I've added a bit more regarding that on one of my posts above.

OP posts:
Original poster
Lady08 · 23/02/2021 01:24

@namitynamechange - I am unsure about the womaniser, there seems to be mixed reviews. Is it a strong sucking sensation on your clit? Not sure if it would be too intense for me.

OP posts:
Tootsies · 23/02/2021 07:53

Morning. No, no longer, in fact, in an extended session I can O several times Grin so I told him about this thread and asked him this question. He told me that he doesn’t think it’s him, or it would’ve happened with other people too and it hasn’t. I think anatomically we are just a very good fit and how I feel about him also helps Grin

Original poster
Lady08 · 23/02/2021 08:34

@Tootsies - Yes I think sexual compatibility plays a part. Does he spend a good amount of time pleasuring you, before you have sex?

OP posts:
AlexaStop · 23/02/2021 17:04

Can I just add that this thread inspired me to buy the womaniser, it's just been dispatched!