Online dating in your 40s - part 3!

[StarlightSparkle]

A new thread, so we can continue discussing the depressing reality of the above!

@onemorerose it sounds like its going well for you!! Im kinda jel

@Ntwa four years is a long time to give someone, I'm sorry. I think you sound lovely so try and keep your head held high. This only really reflects badly on him. I found I needed to hit rock bottom. For me, that was when I felt like I was being clingy, which isn't me. That gave me the strength to step out of the situation. I don't want to be in a relationship where I have to chase someone to speak to me. Then I really have hit rock bottom! There is definitely better out there.

@eesha agreed, being made to feel bad/in the wrong etc makes you suddenly think 'Erm no'.. Its them.. They know the things we like to hear. I keep reminding myself of negatives whenever I feel sad. Every so often I'll cry and cry then move on.. Crap times due to a lot of great memories, but some things aren't meant to be.

@Ntwa i really admire your resolve, you're amazing.

@Angelofdeath ive stopped sending any messages myself as they always, always get ignored! Do you send any or not bother?
I do hold out the hope there are some good ones out there, thats what keeps us trudging on with it i guess.

@Shayelle2009

He had to go... started getting bombarded with the usual ‘what you up to’..’hows your evening’... ‘what you got planned for today’ which all irritate the crap out of me... then sending further messages when i hadn't replied within 3 hours because you know, im kinda occupied living my life. cant stand being hounded. Maybe I should just be cool being single as honestly I hardly ever click with anyone. Only 3 I really clicked with in the last year - not very good going is it ?!?😂😂

Oops I've sent Mr Computer Geek those types of messages, he does to me too though.

Its different when you know someone a bit though... just think its a bit boring for the first few messages

Hows it going with your one @Isitreally777?

@Eesha hopefully youre going to put yourself first now, not him. He's doing the cowardly thing by being dishonest.

@Shayelle2009 it's not going anywhere at the moment, apparently he has a big week in his life this week but is around at the weekend.

@Isitreally777 are you meant to be meeting him at the weekend?

@bangheadhere40 I have no idea anymore, I think that's the plan but who knows🤷‍♀️.

@Isitreally777 i know I'm not the best for giving advice given the state of my romantic life but don't you think you should try and meet someone else as I think this person is playing you. Or do you enjoy the chat so much that you kinda don't want to find out either way. It's easy to live in a fairytale as you're never disappointed. The only thing that's giving me strength at this point is the thought that my partner is potentially ghosting me/finding me annoying and that's given me the strength to step back.

@Eesha I get where you are coming from. I don't know whether he is playing me or whether he is telling the truth and is just going through a tough time. Most chats with matches I've had, have died a natural death but not this one.

I found that too apart from with my last iron. Never really dried up and if it did he would always come back.

This went on for so long too and I just ended up getting really hurt. Looking back I wish I'd cut him off when he first wouldn't make plans.

Is it that these men dont let the chat dry up though, and others do? Is it because they are manipulative/have an agenda that they know how to keep the chat going? Or us it that the two of you do naturally get on well which keeps it going.

@Angelofdeath I do think some guys aren't very good at keeping their profiles updated. Seen a few that say ‘want someone to spend these autumn evenings with’ haha so he might not be lying.

@Isitreally777 i think if you really can't let go, then maybe try hard to have other options. It's a bit depressing but I find I think someone is laughing at me, I can stay far away from them. I'm trying that with my iron. You still seem to be seeing Mr Computer Geek in a positive and honest way. Which is fine but he seems to have cancelled quite a few times, something is clearly wrong.

Hehe @Angelofdeath love it that you're questioning these things, thats what i do, I like things to add up, even if they're small things. Meh to one line answers and messages that generally feel like you're pulling teeth!

I was kind of wondering if I should have been so hasty to block the guy who was sending the dull messages yday but Ive found that if you unblock someone and try to chat to them again they're usually a bit arsey, so I dont anymore

Must say its really good chatting on this thread as we’re all going through the same crap with men... a lot of my friends are happily married so its just nice to chat to ladies in a similar boat

Just started chatting to a good looking builder... how long do we give it before it goes pears... 😂😂 end of the day??? Place your bets!! Haha 🤣