Online dating in your 40s - part 3!

[StarlightSparkle]

A new thread, so we can continue discussing the depressing reality of the above!

@Angelofdeath mmmmm do you believe him.... might just be trying to sound intellectual 🙄

Nothing from mr jd today but might be message fatigue as we were chatting all day yesterday solidly.

I'm 46, 47 next month eek!
From his photos I thought he was very attractive, the first meet I thought he was not as good looking as his photos (and no doubt he thought same about me as we all put our best up there), but it was more the whole bundle of him, he's kind, gentle and funny... now I'm soooooo attracted to him which I wasn't on first meet up, if that makes sense

So ladies last night I ended my wee "relationship" I had since october. I am a bit disappointed but overall ok. The issue with his work just kept coming up, I do get that he was a stay at home dad for years so after his ex wife cheating on him and leaving him and their 3 kids I get that training and getting a job is massive but at this stage when hes not working hes exhausted and not much company. Such a pity as we got on well and the chemistry was off the scale. He suggested a break to see if things settle for him but I said I couldn't see how a break would help. He said he would like to stay in contact and although he agreed with what I said was reluctant to end things. Within an hour of our conversation he sent me a jokey meme. I just want someone who wants to see me and make time for me. Any pearls of wisdom....was I right? What next? Thanks so much.

@Swears that sounds great, delighted for you.

Dont blame you Angel i would be the same. If youre not feeling it, there’s zero point!! I keep checking my phone for jd. Always been in the dicksand with this one! 😓

Hi @LuckyLinda3 say no staying in touch on his ‘break’. Block him and get back out there, thats what id do. x

@Angelofdeath thank you. I was happy with once a week but our conversations just seemed to be about when he was next working! I know hes trying to get a permanent post there but still you have to have a life outside of work too I believe.

@Shayelle2009 thanks! You seem to have the moving on thing sussed....any tips?

Oh sorry to hear that @LuckyLinda3, what a shame. Could he not just try not talking to you about work or is it a definite deal breaker? I’m sure you’ve thought this through already.

@Swears always nice to hear a positive story, glad you are having a great time 😊

@onemorerose thank you. Yeah we did talk about it but he said he wanted to prioritize work right now and I noticed that the energy wasnt really there in his texting either. It wasnt the shifts he was rostered on for more that he was volunteering to come in on the days he was meant to be off. That really meant we couldn't even arrange a day/time in the end. It also means his life is just a blur of work and rest and I needed more than that. He did say that he felt he had been way too easy going about us but I had been clear that I wanted to see him at least once a week and was able to do that from my end. I think because we have had the conversation before that I will leave it this time and wont reach out again. I already know I will miss our wee texts and chats though as we were in contact every day...not to mention the physical side of things!!

Hi @LuckyLinda3 i guess its easy for me to say that when im not in it. But i had a similar experience in my last relationship and wish id just womaned up in that instant and put the wall up. Good luck as you need to be strong.

Jd text me... yay

@LuckyLinda3 Sorry to hear that. I have a friend going through the same thing with her guy at the moment. There's also another thread where the OP is talking about something similar. There seems to be a lot of it around, lockdown relationships fizzling out. It's strange. I can't wait for things to get back to normal.

@Shayelle2009 Yay

I've got one on the go at the moment. He's nine years younger than me though.. so will probably go nowhere!

JD is 6 years younger than me @OutingMyself and is always going on about ‘the older woman’ being hot 😂 i say enjoy it!!

I think a lot of guys like women older than them..maybe its a confidence thing??

Does anyone flirt with their irons whilst messaging? I havent flirted with anyone for years 😂 nothing terrible but I just feel a bit.. like should I be or not ?!?😂 lol

Whenever I talk to younger guys they always seem to freak out when it comes to meeting, they seem to like the novelty. This one is very attentive to messages, but it could go either way in the looks department in real life 😁

I flirt in a very minor way (you have nice eyes etc) because I'm scared of meeting them and them getting the wrong idea.

He's asked to meet 😬

Computer Geek is 7 years younger than me, at the start he said he had never been with an older woman. My ex is the same age as Computer Geek so for me it didn't even occur to me that people would class me as an older woman and I got quite offended when he called me that.😂

@Shayelle2009 I've flirted with Computer Geek on occasions, little things like sending him a picture of a poster I had seen in a shop that i knew he would take the same way I took it (not the way the shop had intended).

Ooooo @OutingMyself thats a result! Exciting!

@Isitreally7777 i usually get on better with younger guys as they're a bit more fun and lighthearted ( i find) also ive always found older guys to get a bit proprietary... hate that!

JD said both yesterday and the day before about meeting so i feel like we will this time. Im glad as he seems all keen (for now...lol) we were chatting for a long time and became quite close (i thought) so hope he realised this time we’ve reconnected in shreks swamp and hes got to make it happen! Its all good do far though we always got on really well before so im buzzing now

Happy Valentines Day everyone! Even if there’s no man, there’s kids, pets, friends, parents, siblings 💗 to love, hee hee!

@Shayelle2009 I do too, I've tried with older ones but I just don't get that spark or enthusiasm from them. Think men my age think I should be grateful of their attention.