Could you ever love a man who..

[complimint]

Walked out on his wife and six months old baby , even if you knew for facts that he was being emotionally and financially abused ?
I know the truth through reliable
Channels and despite these abuses , am still struggle with a man who walks away from his wife and child.
He acknowledges completely how despicable it was and is to do that while also adding that his situation was either going to result in him leaving the marriage or taking his own life..?

Well if he was being abused as you say then he would have had good reasons, but there’s only 2 people who really knows what goes on in a marriage.... I’d be wary though and want to know if he’s done the right thing by the child afterwards? Paid maintenance, spent time with baby?

What kind of "reliable channels" ?

Reliable channels 🤔😂

He sounds fab OP, crack on.

He is entitled to walk out of the relationship but not on his child.

Does he pay maintenance? Does he see his child? These answers determine what kind of man he is. That is how he will treat any children you have together.

I’m afraid internet strangers are not going to know any better than you what the truth of the situation is.

Maybe he did leave a toxic environment, maybe he was just a coward.

Does he still financially support his child. Does he still see his child?

If you walked out on an emotional and financial abusive partner would you feel that no one should love you?

You can leave a marriage and still have a relationship with your child. Did he?

As long as he still sees the child. Anyone is allowed to leave a relationship kids or no kids. If he starts feeding you "oh she won't let me see them" "I've tried but she's so difficult" "the courts wouldn't listen to me" then I would start to question him.

Official
Channels are the police . Yes he pays maintenance and has his child ten years on, eow and holidays . He works 200 miles away from his child .

What do you mean walked out on the child has he went no contact with the child and is not supporting emotionally and financially?

Walking out on a partner, yup, I have no issue with, relationships end. Waking away from a child. Never. So you need to clarify.

So he didn’t want out on the child? Just his abusive partner?

What are you saying, he should have stayed and taken it? Do you say that to women who are being abused?

I wouldnt with him to be my partner for a few reasons.
If the abuse he suffered is true then he needed to walk away to be safe. However I would not want to be involved due to the fact there is a permanent link with the ex and i also don't want to be involved with a man with child for financial and parenting reasons.

Did he leave and never have contact with the baby again or contribute financially? If that’s the case then no but if he split up with her and then continued to see the baby and pay Maintenance then of course. I could never be with a man who could just walk away from his child.

Just read your update - So he split up with his wife when they had a young baby? It’s unfortunate but it happens

“The police”?

So he didn’t walk away from the child as he has a relationship with them. He left an abusive marriage which was severely damaging his mental health.

Tbh OP, when people feel the need to get randoms on the internet to advise whether or not a new relationship seems worth it the answer is usually no. Trust your gut or walk away but if you’re compelled to canvas strangers then it’s probably not wise. And he doesn’t need to be with someone who’s judging him on painful decisions he felt he had to make a decade ago. Leave him for someone else.

If he starts feeding you "oh she won't let me see them" "I've tried but she's so difficult" "the courts wouldn't listen to me" then I would start to question him.

Though do remember that some exs will use children as a means to continue the abuse/control.

How did the police advise you of his ex-partner's crime? That's quite unusual. Do you mean you've seen paperwork?

It doesn't matter what anyone here would do OP, alarm bells are clearly ring for you and that is sufficient reason to end the relationship.

Who are you in this op?

What is the problem with him leaving an abuse relationship if he is still pay for his child and sees him often?
Also, how did the police inform you?

Yes of course it's ok to have a relationship from someone who removed themselves from an abusive situation and continues to have a relationship with, and provide for their child.

Why are the police telling you about things another person allegedly did a decade ago?

You're not describing someone who "walked out" on their child anyway.

Is this a relative or a partner? If it's a partner, I'm not sure why you're entangling yourself with someone you clearly despise.

If it's a relative, I'm not sure why you're canvassing randomers.

I am his new girlfriend and I have seen the paperwork . I find it hard to understand a man who would leave his newborn baby but am inexperienced. Too.

I don't really even understand the question. What does walk out on mean? You said he pays maintenance and sees his child regularly. So the question really is AYBU to date a man who once split up with someone when their baby was young?

There's nothing inherently wrong with breaking up with someone when you have a young baby. Even without taking abuse into account.

Relationships break up- no issue
Men who don’t support/ see or fight for their child- issue!!!

Which was it?