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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

The One Where Ross Has To Figure Out Clingfilm

964 replies

StuckInPollyannaMode · 15/12/2020 05:46

Previous thread

How’s that for a title?!

Well, I’ve done a deal on the car. Actually it drives very nicely. I can see it’s practical. And it’s not an old banger.

It’s not very me. But it is sensible, and sensible I must be.

Actually got some kip last night. 9-5.

How’s everyone else doing? Justilou is it warm in Oz? One of my best friends lives there and I haven’t seen her for too long. RandomMess have you managed to have a better night / find out when you’re going home?

I haven’t told him about handing it over to the solicitor and no mediation on Friday yet. Waiting for the notes and financial summery from the mediator first. Hopefully today.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
15
DeciduousPerennial · 14/01/2021 21:20

“It’s up to you what you do, and certainly not for me to say. Make sure you increase maintenance this month though, if you spend it entirely at your mother’s and won’t be able to stick to what we agreed about the children. No idea about AirBnB. Or storage. I definitely don’t think it’s appropriate for you to redirect your post to me - maybe ask your mother? Do you need these spare table mats?”

DeciduousPerennial · 14/01/2021 21:21

OR SEND HIM A BULLET-POINTED EMAIL

Sicario · 14/01/2021 21:21

Good luck for tomorrow! Also - what @frazzledasarock said about total snuggle-bugs time with your little chicks! I had exactly the same the moment we got rid of our Geller-Albatross. Camping out and carpet picnics and my girls loved it and we were happy as beans. Wrapped up in duvets in bed or on the sofa watching cartoons and snoozing.

Your new home will feel like home to them in no time at all, because you bring your home with you in your heart and actions. I can tell. Flowers

ovenchips · 14/01/2021 22:06

@stuckinpollyannamode Very best of luck with your move. Imagine yourself in 6 weeks' time settled in to your new home with your girls. And no Geller. Imagine how good that will feel!

I sincerely hope your ex decamps to his mother's. It will give you - and your girls - a much needed break from him. I think it's likely that your girls, esp your older daughter will blossom without him around tbh. If she does, that will inform you what shared arrangement may be best for your daughters and affirm the split was the right decision.

Final thought - in the temporary absence of wifi could you use a dongle/digital data?

Good luck in your new life! Flowers

DameFanny · 14/01/2021 22:53

@DeciduousPerennial

OR SEND HIM A BULLET-POINTED EMAIL
Or a flow chart, where every decision box goes to [has Pollyanna left me]=>[yes]=>[this is my problem to solve]
StuckInPollyannaMode · 15/01/2021 03:23

It’s hard trying to sleep sandwiched between the kids.

Cat was shouting so I’m now wide awake and curled up on the sofa. Stuff everywhere. I just hope the removal men can cope. And that I’ve boxed everything up enough. There’s a few open ones cos things are a bit too tall - they can always go in my car.

I suggested an Air BnB belonging to one of the parents from school, along with a couple of other options. It’s up to him now.

God, I’ve got so much stuff. I mean, it’s cool, cos I can sell it, but right now I’m looking at all these boxes and wondering how on Earth they will all fit. Next year I must declutter. Panicking a bit in case it doesn’t fit in the garage. But if I need to I can put it all in the single room I was going to use as an office, I can cope without for a bit.

I’ve not had a chance to email my divorce solicitor yet, so he hasn’t been served with the petition. Frankly I don’t think another week or so is going to make much difference. After that, the question is where to send it 🤣

Funnily enough, I’m not going to miss this house. I don’t think. I’ll miss the things I put in it, like my beautiful radiators. But I got the rugs and the pictures and the Loaf sofa and bed - stuff like that doesn’t matter to him - all of which I chose.

One more mountain to climb. I’ve got a big supermarket delivery coming this afternoon, and put in a takeaway curry for myself. I’ve packed some firewood for the Woodburner tonight and have a load coming Saturday afternoon, so we’ll be nice and toasty.

A good friend is coming for 3 hours to help me unpack and bringing me lunch. Sod the Covid rules, she said. Bless her. Just going to focus on beds made, plates and cutlery, glasses and lamps - always so much nicer than the overhead lights. Anything else is a bonus.

I’ve not cried lately. Suspect that’ll come.

One of the things I’m most looking forward to is being able to talk to my friends freely. I keep thinking about whoever said their house was suddenly full of people dropping in - mine used to be like that, but I’ve realised now it isn’t - quite apart from the Covid stuff - and that I rarely talk to my friends as I can’t talk freely. I never did any of the fun Zoom things in the first lockdown because he wouldn’t like it. Now I can!

One foot in front of the other. Time to stop wittering and try and get some more sleep.

OP posts:
StuckInPollyannaMode · 15/01/2021 03:24

Oh my days that was a ramble and a half! Apologies.

Oh, and I don’t think he’s realised yet that he needs to pay me half maintenance for this month 🤣

OP posts:
justilou1 · 15/01/2021 03:41

Happy House Warming @StuckInPollyannaMode!!! I know you have a very big couple of days, but you’re going to be about 85kg lighter (or however much Geller weighs) by this time tomorrow. Wishing I could help you move, but sending all my best from Aus! X

The One Where Ross Has To Figure Out Clingfilm
shutthedamndoor · 15/01/2021 06:01

Good luck today, I hope it all goes smoothly!

Fooshufflewickjbannanapants · 15/01/2021 06:16

Good luck!! You'll be exhausted and running on empty I'm sure but this is the beginning of a very good life. Be kind to yourself, cry if you need to and have an unmumsnetty hug from me,

Happynow001 · 15/01/2021 06:39

Really wishing you the very best for a smooth move today @StuckInPollyannaMode! There'll be some blips and mentally exhausting times for you and the girls but calmer waters are ahead! 🌹

Ohalrightthen · 15/01/2021 06:52

Good luck Polly! Rooting for you over here.

ThinkWittyThoughts · 15/01/2021 07:03

I am thinking of you today Polly and hoping it all goes well.

Freedom is so close, you can probably taste it!

ByeByeMissAmericanPie · 15/01/2021 07:03

Go Polly... GO...!!!!

Wishing you lots of luck on your first day of freedom.

I eat biscuits in bed. I shouldn’t because I shouldn’t eat biscuits... but I was never allowed to eat in bed in my marriage. Not even Mothers Day breakfast.
So I eat a biscuit in bed every morning with my tea.

May your days be full of regaining control of your life again.

Theluggagerules · 15/01/2021 07:13

Good luck, it's a fabulous day for a move 😁

katmarie · 15/01/2021 07:33

Just popping in to say I hope your move goes well. Moving under any circumstances is bloody stressful so take it easy on yourself. Good luck!

pointythings · 15/01/2021 07:37

Wishing you all the best for a smooth move and a settled night tonight with your girls in your new place. All the rest will come.

BrowncoatWaffles · 15/01/2021 07:48

Another one thinking of you today @StuckInPollyannaMode. Sure it’s going to be an insane day physically and mentally but hopefully you’ll be on the sofa with the fire on and a glass of the good wine before you know it.

Everything is only going to get better from today.

Welshgal85 · 15/01/2021 07:48

Hope the move goes well! 😊

Pashazade · 15/01/2021 07:51

Good luck, don't worry the removal men will cope with however the boxes are. Enjoy your lamp lit curry later I'm sure it will taste fantastic!

FelicityPike · 15/01/2021 07:53

Just wanted to wish you & your girls well for today.
I don’t do hugs...ahh go on then, a very unmumsnetty one.

Badgerling · 15/01/2021 08:01

Today is the day @StuckInPollyannaMode!

I’ve been following from your first thread, and wishing you strength (and gin) from afar.

I hope today goes as smoothly as possible for you and the girls, your curry will be the best one you’ve ever had after it all.

I’ll be thinking of you today

Daftapath · 15/01/2021 08:14

Hope today goes smoothly for you and the girls!

harknesswitch · 15/01/2021 08:43

Good luck for today op Thanks

You may find the tears never some, when I left my ex I kept wondering why I felt so free and content, why I hadn't cried, why I was actually happy. Well it was because I was all those things. I never did cry.

Starbonnet123 · 15/01/2021 08:45

Good luck today Polly to you and your girls, I'm so excited for you . It's a wonderful feeling to have your own front door .
Have a great day ThanksCakeGinWine

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