I've been seeing a new man, met via OLD. He seems very nice, we live about 30 miles apart and have seen each other maybe once or twice a week for the last 5 weeks. We're both looking for a serious relationship.
Anyway he messaged me on Instagram with a link to an account that I might like to follow (a mutual interest) out of curiosity to find out what else he was interested in, I went through who he follows.
I was dismayed to find one of them was a prominent conspiracy theorist who believes the royal family are shape shifting aliens.
There were also several accounts which were a bit shady in terms of women in really tight fitting clothes doing yoga poses which were all about showing off their crotch. When I clicked through on the bio, they led to "only fans" accounts. Another one was a sexy lingerie account. No total nudity but still a sexual account.
I am very sensitive about this because I dated a porn addict for a few months and it was a nightmare. I don't think this guy is a porn addict because he doesn't have erectile dysfunction and he clearly finds me very sexy and enjoys sex with me.
I want a man who doesn't follow such accounts. It was only about 5 of them that he follows but the conspiracy theory thing combined with these accounts has put me off him. To give more context, I am a second wave feminist who dislikes porn and any kind of sex work.
I also find it a bit immature & careless that he would publicly follow such accounts using his business account (he has a creative arts business.)
I'm not sure whether to let him know (when it comes up later) that porn is a dealbreaker for me.
Or just bail now.
What would you do?
If I hadn't been through his Instagram to see who he follows I wouldn't have known any of this about him.
He did say something last week about how he wondered if the covid numbers are made up and not as high as people think, which struck me.