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Original poster

Need to know what this means...

86 replies

Jellykins09 · 03/10/2020 13:27

Name change.
Can wise people of mumsnet tell me what this means?
Does this mean there has been some form of communication in July?
My hands are shaking and I feel sick, apologies for the short post, I can hardly breathe right now.

Need to know what this means...
OP posts:
Kandinsko · 03/10/2020 16:04

I know on my old phone there was also at least one contact where there was always an encryption message visible to me underneath the last exchange. The person I’m thinking of hasn’t been in touch yet on my new phone so can’t compare this!

However I’ve had a look through the other chats on my new phone and none of them have this – only at the top on the date of the first contact on the new phone.

So it appears to vary between phones and/or possibly contacts.

Fabpinky · 03/10/2020 16:07

If there had been messages which he deleted without deleting the whole chat, it would says “message was deleted by you”

I’m unsure why the encryption message is showing from feb but if there were messages in that chat between feb and July you would be able to see that they had been deleted

Kandinsko · 03/10/2020 16:10

Just read your most recent update OP. Afaik chats can only be archived manually. I do this with some chats, and to do it you swipe to the left and tap ‘Archive’. I’ve never known this to happen automatically without me actively doing it.

Sweetchillichicken · 03/10/2020 16:11

Msybe he deleted and reinstalled the app in feb and that’s why there’s encrypted messages? His story could make sense I guess but you still have to choose to archive a chat so by not deleting it he was keeping her number there.

Kandinsko · 03/10/2020 16:15

I have just had a further check and tried deleting a message that someone has sent me. Once it’s deleted there’s no message to show it was ever there. I believe you might see a message if someone deletes their own message from the chat?

lunalulu · 03/10/2020 16:15

It means that in Feb a chat was created which was totally private. However, no communication was necessarily exchanged - just one or other party set any correspondence to secret.

Then in July the person whose phone you were looking at blocked the other correspondent.

So there may or may not have been a conversation in Feb. It could have been one line. Or any number of messages. But the contact was ended and blocked in July.

IAmBeatrixKiddo · 03/10/2020 16:19

Whether he's been in contact with her or not, this is no way to live OP. He basically gave up any right to be believed when he cheated on you. This will drive you crazy in the end. I'm so angry on your behalf!

VenusTiger · 03/10/2020 16:20

Maybe he uninstalled Whatsapp altogether after the affair came out - then in July reinstalled it (maybe no emails etc. so he thought she had stopped contacting him) saw a message that was sent months ago in February so deleted it and then blocked her straight away.
Could all be innocent on his part.
Is he reasonable to talk to as regards your trust issues now? Does he know that lying is a waste of your life and do you believe him OP?

Kandinsko · 03/10/2020 16:25

Just checked this with someone on my chat list – they deleted an old message they sent me but it hasn’t disappeared my end – I can still see it.

I’ve tried deleting one of my own messages and one if theirs, and once I’ve done that there’s no trace they were ever there (although could still be visible to the other person on their WhatsApp).

My phone is an iPhone 6s.

Original poster
Jellykins09 · 03/10/2020 16:26

OK... theres another twist.

Hes just shown me an archived message, of a mutual friend.

Same date in February, encrypted message.
Then blocked, same date in July.

He saying it was July he deleted and downloaded whats app again.

Hes is absolutely adamant no contact and is doing everything he can to proove it....

I'm so confused right now...

OP posts:
Nevercastaclout · 03/10/2020 16:32

If he deletes the app then downloads it again it will ask if he wants to reinstate all deleted messages so you could make him do that in front of you to check.

TPS2009 · 03/10/2020 16:35

I’ve just tested this whole scenario out and it honestly seems like he has deleted a chat that began on that date and archived it.

The encrypted message is there-but this was never a secret conversation of such .

Can u speak to the mutual friend ?

SonEtLumiere · 03/10/2020 16:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AramintaLee · 03/10/2020 16:36

I don't think anyone apart from your DH is going to be able to tell you exactly what it all means... and it's up to you whether you trust him or not. It sounds like you don't trust him (why would you when he cheated!) and you really have to think whether you want to live your life having doubts and suspicions. I hope you find the answers you want OP.

TPS2009 · 03/10/2020 16:39

@SonEtLumiere but have you been able to archive it? It seems if there is no conversation , you can’t archive

Ernieshere · 03/10/2020 16:41

What reason did he have for having to change his entire number?

Sarahandco · 03/10/2020 16:42

If he changed his phone number then that is why he would have received the encryption notice. If for example he bought a new sim card with new number and put it into his existing phone then he might have had all his contacts and WhatsApp contacts still on his phone. when he starts to message people with the new number it gives you the encryption message. looks like he put a new number in his phone and blocked the other person.

GameSetMatch · 03/10/2020 16:44

Go out, clear your head have a think, you need to be sure of yourself and him and not be overwhelmed. Just go for a walk or drive to a car park for an hour and have a think.

Sarahandco · 03/10/2020 16:45

in your second image it shows he was added to a chat or group by someone else. It could be innocent if he changed his number in February and then in July he was contacted and at that point blocked the number.

Kandinsko · 03/10/2020 16:54

@TPS2009

I got new phone recently and kept old sim and same number. I haven’t got round to manually putting in a lot of the contacts who I had saved on my old phone.

When I go on my WhatsApp, none of the conversations with these contacts are visible now. They just don’t ‘exist’ on my WhatsApp account.

However, someone not saved on my new phone messaged me recently on WhatsApp, and now there’s a new chat for them. I think when they did this I was given the option to accept their message (by clicking OK) or block them, and maybe a third option, can’t remember.

The date at the top of the chat is the date of the first message they sent to my new phone. None of our older messages have loaded – there’s no evidence of any contact prior to this first message.

When I installed WhatsApp for the first time on this new phone, it also automatically listed a few group chats, with the statement ‘you have been added to this chat’ with the option to select OK, block, etc. I clicked ok, and at the top it has the date the group chat was started (in Oct 2018, when I was still on my old phone). So it seems to handle group chats differently.

I’m on iPhone 6s. There are differences between phone models.

Iminaglasscaseofemotion · 03/10/2020 16:55

I just tried on my WhatsApp. I blocked a contact I've never had a conversation with, the encryption message came up after I blocked the number. It wasn't there before, then I blocked dp and just the tap to unblock message came up.
The inscription message comes up as soon as you start a conversation.

Original poster
Jellykins09 · 03/10/2020 16:55

@Sarahandco

in your second image it shows he was added to a chat or group by someone else. It could be innocent if he changed his number in February and then in July he was contacted and at that point blocked the number.
The second image was from another MN-etter, not me.
OP posts:
IndieTara · 03/10/2020 17:08

OP this is not about WhatsApp it's about whether or not you trust him

DescustinHunAmFumminMe · 03/10/2020 17:16

Unfortunately I don't think you will get a clear answer here. I've just deleted all the messages in this chat starting from the date shown and then blocked the contact now. It looks like your first image however other people are getting the same result through a different process so it seems nobody can say for sure. Sorry.

Need to know what this means...
Baileysandcream · 03/10/2020 17:23

All messages in Whatsapp are encrypted, it's not a secret setting, it's just what Whatsapp does.

If you go to Whatsapp settings and select security, it explains that you get notifications when security codes change because either you or your contact reinstalled Whatsapp or changed phones.

The encryption message in February will be because either your DH or OW reinstalled Whatsapp or changed phones in February. It does not prove there was any communication between them on WhatsApp.

I have this message on the screen with some friends/contacts that I have never used WhatsApp to communicate with.