Leaving husband over something that happened years ago

[Lemonsand]

I feel like I need to leave my husband. I love him to death but a few things he has done over the years eat away at me. Worst incident was when he smashed my sons bed up while he was sat in it. He was only 6 years old at the time and i was a work. Apparently my son was naughty and my husband lost his temper. This was 4 years ago but i still sit sometimes and imagine how terrified he must have been. Hes also punched a hole in my wall. We also have issues with control. If i go out to my frienda house i always come back to a bad atmosphere. I also recently found out he had been texting a woman from work about our marriage issues though they have both said nothing happened. I told him i was leaving a few days ago and all he has done is cry and i feel awful. 99% of the time he is lovely but I cant seem to get last what hes done in the past. Not actually sure what i am posting for. Im just so confused. I have been with him since i was 16 and am now 28 so its a big scary step to take.

Why are you even thinking about this

Smashing you’d kids bed up whilst he is in it aged FOUR then abusing your dog. He would have been gone then.

Get your son out of this environment.
The rest is the shit show is just ongoing proof he’s an absolutely dreadful person

@Lemonsand

Don’t kid yourself he will take it well
Get yourself and your child and anything else that matters away from him.

He will be planning what to do next and it won’t be pretty

'He took it surprisingly well'
... ...reads the message on the tombstone.

He's probably plotting something.
Or he doesnt believe you yet.
Get outa there asap!

OP you have no idea what effect this sort of behaviour has on an impressionable child.
DS and DDIL fostered a lad who came from a background of a home where violent outbursts were the norm.
Poor kid when he got in a temper he would break things, holes in doors, kick the dog, and had to be removed when he broke DDIL's arm, and could see nothing wrong in any of this behaviour.
Don't please normalise this behaviour and confirm to your DS that this is very wrong.
One incident of this behaviour, you maybe give him the benefit of the doubt, but the kicking the dog would have done it for me. The very fact that on both occasions your DC was there is really a no brainer, you are so young this doesn't have to be your life.
Do the right thing for your child.(and dog!)

@TorkTorkBam

No!

Do not tell him tonight it is over.

Chances of extreme violence towards you: VERY HIGH

Speak to Women's Aid about the right way to leave a man who has been extremely violent in the past like your DH.

Please take this onboard, op. ^

Do not tell him you're leaving.
No good will come of it and you could be putting yourself and your son in mortal danger.

Oh fuck, too late.

Bloody hell, what an abusive piece of shit who preys on children and animals.

OP im so sorry to hear you are going through this. I just couldn’t stay with a man like that, I feel so sorry for your son to see his pet being treated like that. It will really affect him for years later.
Please leave if you can. Your son and you deserve so much better 😢

Please let us know you are ok @Lemonsand

Hope all is going well OP

How are things OP?

That day when he abused your dog would have been the last day he ever saw me or my child ever again

OP I hope you’ve left this horrible abusive man