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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

My Dh's wrist watch is driving a wedge between us...

144 replies

artichokes · 02/10/2007 21:04

... it is a very expensive watch and he loves it. He could never afford another watch like it. Thing is it was a gift from his ex. She got in engraved on the back "To X, I love you every second, Y".

I hate the fact that we are married and have a baby but everywhere we go this memento of his last love comes with us. They are not in touch anymore and I am not worried he still loves her but I find this inordinately annoying.

Am I being unfair, obsessive and mad or do people agree that it is weird for him to keep the watch irrespective of how nice it is?

OP posts:
Elizabetth · 03/10/2007 16:13

I find it appalling that there are people out there who wear jewellery or watches engraved with declarations of love from their exes when they are in new relationships and then ignore their partners' feelings about it.

I agree with you about the people who need their partners to divest themselves of everything from their previous lives but that isn't the issue here, is it, so it's just a red herring to bring it up.

Blu · 03/10/2007 16:23

How many posts until someone suggests leaving him?

Blu · 03/10/2007 16:26

Artichoke - actually, I don't think you sound at all bonkers, and he is being a bit dim, especially after you bought him another and he went on about the old one.

Cappuccino · 03/10/2007 16:36

lol Blu

yes thinking about it I am amazed that expat hasn't come on here and said DTMFA

jockinafrock · 03/10/2007 16:39

Women always buy their DP a watch. It's about the only item of male "jewellery" that is universal. When couples split, it seems to be a universal truth that the next woman gets a complex about his watch and replaces it.

I bought an expensive watch for ex DP, which he loved and wore for years. His current partner bought him a far inferior watch (she clearly had Artichoke Syndrome too ) which he wears all time time because he is a nice bloke and understands the subtlties of wimmin's feelings on this one. Not sure where the expensive one ended up!!!

Also, my dad's hideous DP bought revolting bling bling watch for him (60) and he wears that and pronounces it "lovely" (which it aint)

I agree with you artichoke BTW

jockinafrock · 03/10/2007 16:40

arghhhh that read TERRIBLY - i didn;t mean to imply yours was an inferior watch.

Forgive me?!

morningpaper · 03/10/2007 19:24

madamez you are GOOD on these topics

WideWebWitch · 03/10/2007 19:27

I would find this v annoying too
my ex dh still wears a fairly expensive watch I bought him 10 years ago but no engraving

WideWebWitch · 03/10/2007 19:30

Only skimmed but good posts elisabeth
I know sometimes a cigar is just a cigar but this isn't imo, he's taking no notice of OP's feelings imo

meemar · 03/10/2007 19:32

madamez - I agree with you too. This is exactly what is happening to the friend with the insecure wife I mentioned before. He is slowly losing all the friends he had pre-wife.

artichokes - not saying you are this extreme, but the fact that the watch bothers you so much when you say you are not worried about his feelings to ex-gf does not tally.

MaloryTowersJudgyJudgyJudgy · 03/10/2007 19:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LadyTophamHatt · 03/10/2007 19:44

Ohhhh, this would really annoy me off.

I'd have a really hard job of not taking to the shed and smashing it to bits if DH pissed me off....

I can honestly imagine myself taking a screwdriver to engraving and trying to scratch it off.

God...I'm mad, aren't I???

LadyTophamHatt · 03/10/2007 19:55

I wish there was an edit button.

annoy me off??
WTF does that mean then????

morningpaper · 03/10/2007 19:57

I suppose it's like "fuck me off" but politer

LadyTophamHatt · 03/10/2007 20:10

MP.

I just ask Dh if he''d be annoyed too and he would so at least we'd be evens...we could smash the up together

WideWebWitch · 03/10/2007 20:11

Btw, please tell us what sort of watch it is? and how expensive?

WideWebWitch · 03/10/2007 20:12

Not that it matters, I still think he should get rid of it, I would be unhappy with this.

VeniVidiVickiQV · 03/10/2007 20:33

LOL at "annoy me off"

Is it a rolex?

Original poster
artichokes · 03/10/2007 20:58

Its not a Rolex. Its made by a Swiss watchmaker called Patek Philippe.

OP posts:
iota · 03/10/2007 21:06

ooooooohh expensiiiiive

morningpaper · 03/10/2007 21:08

ooh yes

he is basically wearing a big COCK on his wrist

no wonder he likes it

AitchTwoOh · 03/10/2007 21:15

is he terribly good at oral sex? i mean Patek Philippe... that's a non-standard issue gift.

WideWebWitch · 03/10/2007 21:17

lol at big cock

iota · 03/10/2007 21:17

maybe it's a fake

the watch, that is

WizardofWilkdom · 03/10/2007 21:18

Haven't read whole thread but I had same issue. DH had an expensive Armani watch from his ex (not engraved) which I insisted he got rid of before our wedding. I bought him a (cheaper) Kenneth Cole one which he wears constantly and he has given the old watch to my Dad (who now thinks he is a proper groovy grandad cos he wears 'Anarmi'.