Online dating red flags

[BilboBercow]

I feel like this may have been done but I feel so jaded by online dating at the moment and I'm constantly seeing red flags to the point that I'm wondering if it's just me? Would you see the below list as a no-no?
No picture of themselves (obviously)
"Not sure what I'm looking for but I'll know when I find it" - I'll string you along then say I didn't promise you anything
"Are there any normal women out there?"
"Not into vanilla" - can't ejaculate unless I'm hurting you
"I don't like women who wear lots of makeup" - I'm controlling
"Need someone to keep me on my toes" - will treat you like shit and blame you for it

Feel free to add your own. Also feel free to tell me I'm being silly. My ex was abusive so sometimes I worry now that I overanalyse everything.
I also saw a guy today saying "I value loyalty so if you've had more men than hot dinners swipe left" and my initial reaction was "fuckity bye"

[firecracker69]

Those who send you their phone number in their opening message..... wtaf? Imagine giving out your number to a complete stranger, without even talking to them? Screams desperation.

Those who ask if you want to meet up when they haven't even spoken to you, at all. They take a look at your photos and decide purely based on those alone that they want to meet up. No!

[Closetbeanmuncher]

Well I'm 189, look about 22, and my many, many toothless lovers from PoF fight to bring me my butter croissants and freshly squeezed juice when I rouse myself at dawn from my silk lined casket

😂😂😂

[Wavescrashingonthebeach]

Pilots where every picture is them in uniform. Either a catfish or a player who wants a FWB in every postcode 🤮

[ByeAshes]

Men with close up pictures... Like reeeeally close.... No I don't want to see up your nostrils

[spinista]

Great thread .

So , the only guy I've ever hit it off with had only these worse on his profile ' not sure what to write here , hopefully will find a partner '.
I wasn't massively impressed but his pictures were lovely , clear ones of his face at a few different angles and some normal full length ones too. No silly filters or props .
He had a lovely smile and is 6 foot 2. Id had so many awful experiences up until that point and was about to shut my profile down till we matched and he started saying hello. - week into conversing i deactivated my accounts , we met up and he was absolutely lovely - kind , well spoken , gentle , funny , caring , reliable .
Many months later and we're in a great relationship !
So I honestly think if they don't say much it can't always be a bad thing.

[TossACoinToYerWitcher]

So I honestly think if they don't say much it can't always be a bad thing.
To be fair, if you're a guy and your 6ft 2 you very likely don't have to. Well, apart from "I'm 6 foot 2". 😛

[summersolstice43]

I know this is about guys profiles and stuff on dating sites BUT I've noticed a LOT of guys saying their height on their profile then 'as it seems important' and reading this thread it does seem important to a lot of women, why is this? Genuinely interested as height isn't a problem for me really.

[Crystalspider]

6ft 2! Wow

@summersolstice43 I guess a lot of women including myself find a tall man more attractive as they are very masculine, a stronger, taller man would make you feel protected. I'm a tall woman myself and would feel awkward towering over a man, so prefer a man of 6ft or more
I guess if I was a petite woman I wouldnt care so much of height as long as they were taller than me.

[GingerBeverage]

Tall men earn more money. Every inch in height relates to a higher likelihood of more money. www.apa.org/monitor/julaug04/standing

[summersolstice43]

@Crystalspide Thanks. I'm average height, 5'6" and height has never really bothered me. One of my close friends is only 5'5" and he is married to a woman who is 5'8" so it clearly doesn't bother them either. I can understand where you're coming from, I guess I'm just not too bothered about the stronger, masculine man or feeling protected

[summersolstice43]

@GingerBeverage I'm quite shocked at this, I've never ever worked in a place where the taller people are paid more, it seems very shallow.

[ravenmum]

Tall does not equal strong or masculine in my eyes - I can think of several wimpy tall men who are not "traditionally masculine". My tall exh never made me feel protected, either; he'd have been more likely to run away in the face of danger than me!
I'm quite tall myself and in my experience, men are not as likely to be interested in a woman 10cm taller than them. Many men say in their profiles that they are looking for a woman of a certain height.
When I was younger, I was more self-conscious about being tall and preferred taller men. Now I'm less bothered.

[ravenmum]

Taller people aren't deliberately paid more :)

[summersolstice43]

To me its all about personality and if I have any connection to them really. I once had an ongoing conversation with a guy who was 6'4" but in a wheelchair then he was the one who told me he couldn't carry on or meet up as he wasn't comfortable with me being able bodied and towered over him, each to their own I guess but it didn't bother me in the slightest.

[GingerBeverage]

[quote summersolstice43]@GingerBeverage I'm quite shocked at this, I've never ever worked in a place where the taller people are paid more, it seems very shallow.[/quote]
My 3 line managers are all over 6ft (men). But it's an old study so perhaps we've stopped associating "tall" with "leader" and so forth.

[ReginaPhalangee]

Holding a big fuck off fish and looking proud, as though it equates to penis size.

[MikeUniformMike]

I've worked somewhere where most of the managers were tall.
I've also been in stand-up meetings where the tall people talk to each other, making it difficult to get a word in.

[firecracker69]

@ReginaPhalangee

I honestly thought men holding fish, in their profile pics, was pretty much over. It seems I was wrong! I have just had the misfortune of seeing a man holding the biggest fuck off fish I've ever clapped eyes on. It was at least 2/3 of his body size. Ridiculous. I must agree with the comparison to the penis. It's like screaming "look at my enormous cock!" In reality, it's highly likely to be a tad smaller I would think. 🤣🤣🤣

[ReginaPhalangee]

@firecracker69

Ridiculous. Yes, far more likely to be a tiddler!

[chuffedasbuttons]

I've just had the (for me) funniest OLD crash

So he looks good. Educated. Decent description.

My profile says I don't like spiders.

2nd response - He asks if I have ever killled a spider. I reply maybe when I hoover them up.

Poof. He's gone. Thank god I can laugh.

[firecracker69]

😆😆😆😆 Can't stand mardy arses. He clearly has no sense of humour.... or a deep love of spiders. 😂

[CandidaAlbicans2]

Photos with sunglasses on, inside the house. A huge no no!

Ah yes, it's so posy isn't it. I once asked a man who was wearing shades indoors on his profile whether he was visually impaired. He didn't understand why I was asking until I mentioned his dark glasses. Eyesight was fine, he was just a twat

No-nos for me are men holding fish. I can handle someone catching a fish for their dinner, but I hate people who cause stress to any animal as a hobby then take photos of the creature suffocating. Just leave the poor things alone

Men who don't fill out their profiles and write, "will fill this out later" (they never do), or "no good at this, if you want to know anything just ask" (if you can't be bothered to make the effort you don't deserve a date) One lazy bloke with no profile filled out contacted me. As he'd said to ask anything I sent him a list of questions...all the ones from the profile template Never heard back from him, no idea why

[LostConfusion]

Not online dating at the moment but just wanted to add a couple I've seen.

Laid back, traditional guy - looking for a 50's housewife
any name with the numbers 420 included - apparently it's some kind of reference to smoking weed?

I hate the ones that start conversations with hey gorgeous/sexy/etc I don't know why but it makes me feel like they are looking at me like an object - what about when I'm a mess, just woken up and looking awful? I want someone to be attracted to me for me, not just coz i'm wearing make up.

[Eesha]

@summersolstice43 ive noticed you don't have to be gorgeous to pull if you are very tall as a man, the height seems to be enough for most. And there seems to be lots of very attractive shorter men on the sites but I do think many men generally have issues with a woman taller than them. I quite like seeing men with taller partners as shows me they have confidence in themselves.

[summersolstice43]

@Eesha That's a good point actually. At least I understand the importance of height on these sites now. I'd be happy to find a genuine guy who's not a wanker to be honest