Is it OK for dp to have naked photos of ex-girlfriends on the family computer?!

[bigwombat]

Just browsing randomly through the family laptop (kept in living room) when I came across 2 photos of one of dp's very treasured ex-girlfriends (tasteful but still naked!!) along with loads of other clothed ones. She was basically the love of his life but dumped him. I started seeing him a few months after they stopped seeing each other for the 2nd time (first went out 15 years before, he then left his wife for her more recently but it didn't work out).

There are also naked photos of another mysterious woman!

Is it commonplace for men to keep such photos of past lovers or am I right to be a bit bothered? It was on a computer used by everyone including dd1 so he obviously didn't feel he needed to hide it. Also he has never shown any interest in photographing me naked!!

yes I'd happily look at an exes schlong

bring them along for my persusal

why ever not

I've had many happy memories with exes' schlongs

MP, would you really, really be ok for your DH to keep/look at naked pictures of old flames?

yes I wouldn't mind

I'm sure he thinks warmly of them occasionally

I don't see why a picture is that different to his imagination

My goodness you're very calm aren't you? I'd throw a dicky fit and think it'd be over for me. He must be absolutely wonderful for you to be so complacent.

no he's not particularly wonderful

he's all right I suppose

but I've got naked pics of my exes, I don't see for a minute why that is disrespectful of DH

(if that post was directed at me - maybe it wasn't!)

I agree with fio et al on the why would you need to school of thought.

In theory, I can see the point about looking at them fondly when you are a dribbling, sexless old gimmer, but really it does seem odd to think about something like that. Hopefully when I'm at the dribbling and incontinent stage I will be looking fondly back at pictures of my family etc. If I want to gawk at cocks then I would think the nursing home will have wi-fi by the time they wheel me in....

no mp to bigwombat

but it seems far more drastic to me to actually DELETE or RIP UP things like that

why do that? It's my personal life, it's my past. It's my personal STUFF. It's just memorabilia. Same as keeping old letters or photos. Why NOT?

mp you aren't going to agree with the majority so why are you banging on about it?
It's obvious why not as others have said.

i am very surprised at how many people expect a man to get rid of naked ex pictures just cos they are not still together. he is a man. it is a picture of a naked lady. what did people think he was going to do with it?

it would only bother me if he was hiding it. but im quite laid back, i dont usually agree with many people about such issues

I agree its different to have pics/letters at the back of your wardrobe with all the other crap from your youth but you don't want to see them. I think if I did have naked pics of my ex I would be sure to put them somewhere dh wouldn't happen across them. Especially if this was someone you still saw occasionally.
DH is a hoarder so sure he's got some stashed away which is fine but I don't want to see them.

I don't really see the point of keeping stuff, if it was a big love affair you'd still be together.

Well it doesn't matter if some people here would be theoretically OK with nekkid ex pics (although the reality might be somewhat different), bigwombat's question is whether it is reasonable for her to object.

It is reasonable according to the majority, and the minority boasting that they'd be so laid back and secure and non-jealous are just showing off in my opinion (either that or extremely browbeaten by their male partners).

eh? showing off about what?

Agree wholeheartedly with Elizabeth.

I think its also who the pics are of as you haven't really mentioned the other woman much wombat. How are you feeling today? Any better?

Whilst I am aware that my dh does look at porn and things...I would not be happy of him having naked pictures . espcially of ex girlfriends or whatever,, stored....

would you be as upset if you found love letters? or would that be ok? its reasonable to object to anything if you dont like it. however its equally reasonable for him to say he is keeping it. if you dont want opinions dont ask the question. but i need to know why it is showing off, genuinely dont understand that comment

I like banging on

The show offs are probably wife swappers as well
I'm off to dig out dh's stuff and see if he has got anything stashed away > Will let you know what I unearth.

I went through labour, the least he can do is throw a few frickin pictures away.

Tbh, I have talked this through so much that I no longer feel bothered about it!! I think I initially posted not long after finding the photos with a sense of outrage but that has now worn off. As long as my dds cannot see the pictures, then I think they do fall into the category of memorabilia and I don't believe my dp is constantly ogling at them on a daily basis!

WHY IS IT SHOWING OFF?

Glad you are feeling better - hope you made him pay for the take away though!

I like your banging on too MP

its fairly wierd not to have taken them off the family computer - why should you have to share them with him.

Maybe my dh has pictures of his ex naked or otherwise and maybe he looks at them, don't like the thought so I don't think it.

But, if he were to show me the pictures or leave them around for me to find then that would be putting the thought into my head which depending on what day of the week it was would do my head no good at all.

Very odd though, for him to have left them there in first place. That's something you should be bloomin secretive about. Seeing naked pictures of nice looking ex whom he has feelings for - yuck.