Clare's Law Help?

[CagedBirdwithoutAKey]

Hi,

I decided to make a Clare's Law request weeks ago on my DP; not for any particular reason, just possibly a gut feeling of some sort

Anyway, Police guy called me back just now to basically say they're speaking with other agencies etc., but asked me if he stays over, and said if so, don't let him again, for my own safety He said he couldn't disclose much at this stage, so I asked him to just tell me if he was telling me this because something had come back, and he basically said yes

Has anyone had the same happen further to a CL request?

@namechange12a this is helpful to remember, thank you

Clares law is for domestic violence disclosure so what led to you ask for disclosure.... Clearly something. Always, always, always trust your gut instinct.

I'm curious, if he was at university in the 80's and got charged for drunken & disorderly behaviour would that come up on Claires law? Does petty crime charges come up on your record from 38 years ago? That's the part that jumped out for me that I thought his excuse might be bullshit. Obviously I have no experience on this but I would love to know if it does.

I had a look online and it seems they only disclose what is proportionate and relevant.
A conviction for urinating in the street is not proportionate so would unlikely be disclosed.
It said the police do an initial background check and provide advice that they feel is relevant ie no overnights.
The decision to disclose your Dp's history will only be lawful and appropriate if there is a pressing need to protect you or/and children.
The offences must be violent and pose a risk to your safety otherwise they are confidential and not proportionate disclose.

If the police have told you, based on the checks they have done, no overnights, then I would be prepared for something serious to be disclosed

@Blanca87 it's something that would come up on both the PNC and PND (hence him being 'known' to them), but something that would NOT be disclosed under Clare's Law (it's something he's told me himself, but the Police wouldn't be under obligation to disclose this to me, as it doesn't relate to DA in any way)

I have seen a Clare's Law disclosure that gave info about offences that weren't DV but were relevant for the partner to know given the circumstances.

Raise your relationship bar! Can't believe you're waiting for the police to tell you whether to continue this relationship or not.
I can't honestly say that I've never asked the police to check any of my boyfriends.
If you've had to do this then it is obvious that you know deep down that he is not good news. Move on with your life.

Hope this comes back soon for you OP. I have been supporting someone to apply for clares Law disclosure and it took just over five months - so nearly five times as long as recommended. I know everyone is stretched but something did come back in the end but by then they had decided to lockdown together :(

Still no update Wish I'd never made the bloody thing now

It has literally never occurred to me to run a police check on a partner. It don’t think it occurs to the vast majority of people.

There was a reason you did it. Trust yourself, not “the system”.

If I ever got to the stage where I was putting in a Clare's/Sarah's Law application, I would end the relationship right then and there.
Especially with children involved.

Raise your bar a little and wait until you meet someone you aren't suspicious of.

I have looked on the national database at people in my area.

You guys don't know my past, why I feel the need to do this to protect my DCs

I can echo OPs motivations for doing this.
After experiencing DV from a previous partner, I have vowed to myself to run a Clares law check on EVERY SINGLE potential partner I may have. Red flags or not.
Why wouldn't I? In the very early days you have to take whatever people tell you at face value and I'm afraid that the word of someone I don't know very well doesn't hold any weight. Not in something as important as this. I need absolute facts to allow myself ti be involved intimately with a man again. Shouldn't be that way, but its the shitty way of the world unfortunately.

Once you've got to know them better and to trust their word, it might be you've got quite involved and it may make it more painful or difficult to leave them.

Early doors check i say. For every last one of them. My child and I deserve that peace of mind. If they've done nothing wrong, there's nothing to worry about is there?

In fact I lodged a CL request myself a few days ago. The safeguarding mantra "think the unthinkable" is there for a bloody good reason. I don't see it as any different to a DBS check for people working with children.

@5sacrowd Surely you don't mean that you have access to PND and have used it to look up people in your area?

@CagedBirdwithoutAKey You're right; we don't know your past. In saying that, you said earlier that you have been in a relationship with this guy for two years (although you've known him for three years).
I'm not trying to get at you in saying that. I absolutely understand any parent wishing to protect their children and themselves from anyone who may be a risk to them. I just don't get why you would do this two years down the line of a relationship.
I hope you find the answers you're looking for soon.

And sorry for the delay for you OP. It must be so frustrating. I hope you get the answers you need. Well done for putting you and your child's safety first

@Avocano thank you!!! Your post suns it up entirely; it's not a lack of trust, sometimes a need

No, it was through the local newspaper, showing offenders in the area, that I suppose have been to court? It can't have been the database, I can't remember what it was called?

Op try googling his name!

@@Namechange8471 That was the first thing I done!!

Did you find anything?

"If you want to ruin your relationship, go ahead and apply for one of these!"

To be honest if you feel the need for one then I think it's the death knell for your relationship in any event.

@Ginger1982 not necessarily, depends on your past and your need to want to protect your DC

@Namechange8471 nothing