Secret planning to leave DH - days to go .

[Mydoghasbettereyebrowsthanme]

Hi there - previous thread started with DH AWOL , arrested for drink driving . Final straw for me in out marriage , planning to leave in secret on Thursday. 6 days to go . Feeling shit about everything - pain the kids will have to go through , pain and upset his family and him . Wishing he was a reasonable person enough that we could separate amicably. Wishing I could predict which way this is going to go- hating the double life I am currently leading . started this thread just for the hand holding whilst the proverbial hits the fan over the next 7 days !

Good luck for tomorrow.

I’ve just read your thread and my heart rate is pumping away on your behalf. Sending you speed and strength for tomorrow- make sure you have some carbs, sugar and strong tea waiting in your new house for when the Adrenalin wears off as you’ll probably start shaking - good luck

Best of luck for tomorrow. :)

Good luck OP 🤞

Sending you masses of luck for tomorrow. You're amazing 💐

I'll be rooting for you tomorrow. Good luck! 🍀

I have been lurking through both threads. Wishing you lots of luck and strength tomorrow, will be thinking of you

Another one delurking. 😁 I've followed this from the start and just want to wish you and your dcs (and ddog!) the best of luck.

Take strength from the fact that there are 100s of well wishers behind you.

🌹
Aaanndd Breathe,
Very best wishes for tomorrow.

Can't wait to hear you're all safe tomorrow. Thinking of you. Please seek therapy later, it might all hit you when the adrenaline wears off.

Following & wishing you luck

I left an abusive husband with my DC. We were all so relieved as the DC were scared of him. Strangely I was terribly lonely once I d made the move. I didn't miss him, but I did miss adult company even though my DPs were really close geographically. Good luck. I married the most wonderful man later on.

Wishing lots of luck for tomorrow, hope you manage to get what you need out the house

Good luck OP, you can do this!

Good luck. Hope all goes smoothly x

I am cheering you on OP! When I was a child a forest fire was raging towards our house, my mum packed up 2 cars in record time to get our belongings out. There is nothing more impressive to me than a determined mum on a mission. You've had so much amazing advise and I'd just remember paperwork, photos, sentimental things and pets. If time, tech and clothes. As upsetting as it is to lose the rest its replaceable

Also delurking to say you are brilliant and brave. Good luck tomorrow x

Also delurking to say you are brilliant and brave. Good luck tomorrow x

Have you got a list for each helper ? Do it by room and assign each helper a room like the kitchen where there’s fewer choices to be made. Eg

Emma - kitchen
—————————
Half the saucepans and casseroles / the brown saucepan set
All of the blue and and white crockery
All the tea towels expect the red one
Clothes from the laundry basket
Plants from window ledge

Etc etc

You do things like the kids rooms where you know what has to go. Or get a helper to do all their toys and you do the clothes if some have to stay.

Its easy to forget things like the bathroom cabinet /clothes on hooks on back of doors / pictures on the wall /Hall cupboard unless you have someone who has a list that says

Bathroom
——————-
Towels on the rack
All the contents of the cabinet except the top shelf
All the bottles around the bath
Bathrobes on the back of the door
Bath mat

Good luck OP. You'll be fine, the Adrenalin will be something else I'd imagine so just relax when you get to where you are going. He's going to ring your phone off the hook so maybe disable it/or text you'll be in touch in a week or so but block for now? I don't know what is best but he isn't just going to sit there quietly.

Remember anything that is important to your kids, I'd be bringing the 17 year olds Xbox and forgetting the wires for example. Are there garden things you'll want or need etc.

I left my boyfriend when he was at work and luckily I had a friend whose husband was able to help me get my stuff and my cat and take me to theirs for a few weeks. He was not happy and didn't know why I left. Apparently violence towards me and the cat wasn't a reason.

Hope all goes well and please let us know when you can that you are out and safe.

I've been following both of your threads and am wishing you all the luck in the world. You are so brave and are almost free !

You won't sleep tonight but, one thing's for sure, you'll sleep soundly tomorrow. We're ALL behind you. Praying it all goes to plan for you. You have been an inspiration to many. Xx

I hope tomorrow goes as much to plan as it possibly can op, sending strength to you

Been reading both your threads. My goodness you are organised, well done OP!
Good luck. I'll be thinking of you tomorrow.