I need help I have kids scared to leave my partner

[lovemychildren27]

Hi everyone just looking for some advice or someone who's been in a similar situation I have kids and have been with my partner for a long time but I'm scared of him I no this isn't right but I don't no what I can do about it please if anyone can help me out thanks

Yes he will blame you
He will deny

Who cares they all do that

This blaming is what stops us from leaving
Once you get out and have freedom you will feel so good
It is so hard though

I used to have to lock myself in public toilet and call for help

But yet he said he did nothing wrong
It's nonsense

I sense you are so so strong xxxxxxx

I’m on the phone to somewhere now I’m just on hold I will let you no what they say

I have just gone off the phone now I am crying I’m sorry I feel like I can’t do this anymore they said I need to get through to women’s aid as they hold details for all over of refuges that would be able to fit me in and also be in a safe area she was a really nice woman if I need to get out immediately she said I will have to present at the police station the 1 thing I didn’t want to do I’m gonna try and get through to women’s aid my heart feels broken I burst into tears when I was on the phone to the lady

Hang on in there. You've made the first step. I really hope someone more clued up than me will come on and give practical advice x

Thanks

OP sending you big big hugs.

I know you’ve been struggling to get through to woman’s aid on the phone. Have you been able to email them? They say they will respond within 5 days, so you would hear from them by the end of the week if you email today. I wish I could make this better for you. You are doing so well. Deep breaths. We are all here for you.

I have just left a message for them to call me back because they are busy hopefully I will be able to speak to them

You are doing great

Would presenting at the police station be that bad?

Could you explain that you may not want him informed right away or arrested !!?

Tell them I am here looking for help
I need you to help me to get to xx

Or what about getting to an area where you want to present as homeless??

Guys any other ideas?

Op I feel for you so much and it is so so scary xxxxxxxxxxx

Yes I will keep prosecuting to the police as an option I am worried about doing it that way he hates police and it would anger him more I have never reported anything to the police but I will still keep it as an option waiting to here back from women’s aid the lady I spoke to said they hold the whole national database for refuges so they can check everywhere and they would no where would be safe for me to go hope I am doing the right thing I feel like a nervous wreck they haven’t phoned me back yet

Don't give up will you? You're doing great. I know you're scared though

Great work so far

Is he away for long

??

Thanks trying to stay strong so I can do this it just feels so hard thanks

I’ve got about an hour or 2 so not that long hoping they ring back by then

Can't the police help at all? I keep hoping someone more helpful than me will come on

Whilst you have time can you call police non emergency line. Just tell them everything. This is your chance op.
Also I think you are doing amazing!

Sounds like progress. Defo ring again if they don’t phone back

Yeah I am going to definitely ring them again if they don’t ring back thank you everyone for your help

You will do fab

Keep trying

Say call me back ASAP
Please

They must be used to day to day emergencies and families not able to wait around for calls??
Or police??

And tell police what you want not to let them take over if you are afraid they will go to him right away ??
I met the loveliest police officers who could not ah w been nicer

They all have special training in D V

I hope you find somewhere safe OP. Wishing you all the best.

Hi, you can call 101 and tell them everything, they will be able to help and it starts having things on record and they are in contact with all other agencies. They have a specialist DV unit. I know this will sound odd but also call nspcc and they can help advise. Good luck. You are so brave but I know you will get there. I was there. I'm out. It takes a lot longer than you think but you have taken your first steps. Sending hugs

Great advice

You will be able for this

Great advice

You will be able for this

Just been to my local Boots. They are clearly set up to support women in your position with several posters and smaller discrete messages and a booth where you can "see the pharmacist" (get help and support and a space to phone )
The main message says that if you are in immediate danger ring 999. I know you don't want to contact the police, but is that just because HE has a problem with them? You are unlikely to see him again on your own again if you do go to them, so it may not be as negative as it seems.
There's a poster up in Boots about a Bright Sky app. The app has links to a lot of advice and services. Don't know if it would be safe for you to download that though OP? Seems to be London / South East based. Maybe a possibility for when you are actually away from him.
Stay strong.

Thanks everyone just to let you no they didn’t phone me back today but I am going to ring again tomorrow