So confused

[Spain1]

I just said to my husband that we can't go on like this & he just said oh leave me alone & walked away. We are together 28 years married 22 & in separate rooms 10 years. I don't understand how he can be happy living like this but he has no interested in solving the situation one way or another - very confusing.

I think you tell the solicitor you have lived completely separate lives in the same house for 10 years - separate bedrooms, no sex. You also tell her that you started proceedings before, but your family convinced you to abandon them, although you've had separate bedrooms, and no sex since before that time.

Take a list with the addresses and legal descriptions (if you have them) of the properties you own, mortgages on them, and fair market values. Tell him/her of separate properties you each own (his warehouse, for example), how much money you each make, and what each of you have contributed to each property in the time you have lived together, but not as man and wife.

Ask if you move from the matrimonial home, as the situation is unbearable for you, whether that will affect anything.

Spain are there records of his violent behaviour?
Do get advice on whether or not you should stay in the marital home.
I didn't. I left (I just had to make a break) but financially it wasn't good for me.

What @Winterlife said plus Bank statements, pension statements and any other financial documents as well.
Given the length of the marriage, the split should start at 50:50 and be negotiated from there.
Also go with a goal for what you want your life to look like in 2 years time, then work towards that goal.
Good luck

Also, tell the solicitor you don't want mediation. From what you have posted, your husband won't agree to anything suggested, so it will just waste your time.

The big one for me is if I can move out & what affect it will have. I have all the financial stuff. We have no mortgage on the first house but I have been paying the mortgage on this one with my salary for years. Because the marriage is so long I find it hard to remember all the details. I would be happy with 50/50 as long as I get out. Looking forward to Thursday.