What puts you off an online dating profile

[singlemum81]

Top of the list for me is selfies with tops off or drinking cans of beer

@singlemum81, yes definitely, it was all very insidious and I was going through some personal trauma at the time so I kind of sleep walked through some of it, relieved to be out!

My last relationship ended just as I was diagnosed & in intensive with a huge blood clot in my lungs.

Said he wasn't ready for a relationship. Spotted him not long after on pof & match

Thanks @HalfDutchGirl 😄
With the group photos, I assume it’s the ugliest one just for fun. Although it could be a better looking one using their uglier mates for contrast, or an ugly one wanting to show that they are cool enough to have attractive friends. Either way I can’t be bothered to find out!

@HalfDutchGirl I see xxxxx is a form of lovebombing

Aaaa @singlemum81 what an arse. They're everywhere aren't they?
Hope your health is improved now

@famousforwrongreason yup all good now thanks, hope you are too.

None of my friends are using OLD and it's soo good to be able to talk about this!

Yes am still working on it I think, he keeps popping up every now and again and disrupting my equilibrium, he's blocked everywhere, last contact was a letter. I have a lot going on and I'm so much better now without all his headgames adding to it.
Yes it's good to have this space, also good to know that my expectations aren't unrealistic.

@singlemum81 - eeek, that diagnosis must have been scary, glad you’re all ok now. Oh yes, the good old ‘I’m not ready for a relationship’ line!

Almost as good as the self absorbed narcissist I saw for a while last year, I hadn’t returned his texts or calls for about three weeks when I decided to answer the phone to him one day and he had the temerity to dump me, he felt he ‘couldn’t give me what I needed’! I was too busy laughing to give him the cutting response he deserved.

‘Entrepreneur’
‘School of hard knocks’
Not on any any more as settled, but these were the ones that I found instantly off putting. As are gym selfies, posing with an endangered animal etc

In recent weeks, the first line of their bio being 'NHS worker'/'keyworker', as if we're all supposed to instantly drop our knickers in appreciation!

'If you voted X swipe left'.

Guys who never just have a regular son or daughter, it's always 'the coolest little dude', 'my amazing son, 'a beautiful princess'. I don't mean I'm necessarily put off by single dads but that sentimentality, bleurgh.

This thread should be required reading for blokes.

No to:
School of hard knocks
University of life
Job: full time mad bastard
‘No drama queens, gold diggers or fakers’ (ugh)
Anybody that uses the 😜 emoji
Likes: kissing
Any football slogans ‘you’ll never walk alone / City till I die’
Ask (is that a complete sentence)
Any pictures that are sub/dom
Headless photos
Gym shots
Tattoos - not for me, sorry
Any use of the word ‘cheeky’
Group photos that don’t identify who is the poster
Photos zoomed in so much they look like pixel monsters
Profile photos of other people (really? You are Steve McQueen?)

I’ve been on Tinder for a couple of years, and I did meet two lovely men (two! in total!) but the depressing reality is that I take it all quite seriously and put a lot of thought into how I come across ...

I honestly have no clue how to meet someone any more.

Yes university of life and school of hard knocks

Coupled with bad grammar and spelling

Anyone who wants to “treat me like a princess” or is looking for someone who “takes pride in their appearance” or “looks after themselves”.
I saw a profile picture of him snogging another woman, why would anyone think that is a great idea for a dating profile picture?
For me any pictures of him on a motorbike or next to a super car has me swiping away. I am just not interested in bikes or cars but I guess others might be.

@Wasail - a photo of him snogging someone? WTF? That made me laugh.

I don't think it's necessary for guys to put photos of them with their kids on their profiles. I'd prefer to see a selfie.

Job: full time mad bastard

I too hate the aggressive approach 'don't bother contacting me if you love drama' errr, ok then.

I had been doing some online dating but it is awful. You really would have to be very unlucky to meet in real life the collection of men I met from OLD, and these were ones with fairly ok profiles!

Not sure if it's just me but I interpret 'Uni of hard knocks' as quite passive aggressive and its men being insecure about the fact that they're not as well educated as some women 🤷‍♀️

And the drama thing is to keep us on our toes, it's as if to say 'don't mess with me'

I agree with you @singlemum81 on both points

It is very deflating. I don't personally like tattoos but why are so many men absolutely covered in them? chest, neck back and sleeves! These tattoos aren't cheap are they? (Nice to know where their priorities are)

It's becoming more common to be covered in them, than not. Where's the individuality, artistry and rebellion in that? Wear it well or don't bother, you know?

There are a lot of 'lads' on there too, drink in hand, glitter on their faces at some resort/festival- no from me.

They're all a copy and paste of each other now- so few stand out ( for the right reasons, or my preferred reasons)

No baggage or drama and in the same profile I have no children but don't mind if you do

I guess what I'm trying to say is that tattoos are not a deal breaker for me if they're not visible and not stupid (or if the guy is actually a really lovely person) - they do however make me sigh and if they are excessive, or ugly, they won't normally make me a do a double take on an app.

"terrible at this"
"be gentle"
"let's say we met a Tesco"

I don't mind the odd tattoo but if they are plastered in them, especially the neck, face and hands then no thank you.

The other thing that I've come across is when I say I'm Irish, they often come out with some horrible 'funny' pisstake remark. One bloke asked if my name was Paddy and I told him outright how insulting that was. Got a load of gaslighting type replies such as 'I was only joking'. Block!! Another one recently commented something like 'sure to be sure' and something about potatoes.

What the actual fuck 😫

Pretty much everything so I've stopped as clearly I was just waiting for men to rule themselves out. 'How's you' always an early block though.

But before that I learned to avoid 'widowers' having been scammed - it's a thing apparently. Awkward as I'm a widow.

Massively intrigued by the lesbian poses.