What puts you off an online dating profile

[singlemum81]

Top of the list for me is selfies with tops off or drinking cans of beer

@PermanentTemporary I'm intrigued by the widow scammers, what are they trying to achieve?

How do you mean you've been scammed by widowers?

And yes I think someone needs to clarify the lesbian poses thing

I did a big thread on it as a public service/unhinged rant

It taught me that I was much more vulnerable and less ready to date than I thought, so that was valuable.

I was contacted by a nice-looking silver fox who said his wife had died 5 years ago. Well, there are pictures proved to work by scammers that get lifted and used over and over. Basically men with hair and a smile (so I do feel for the bald guys; it doesn't put me off at all but hair is a nice extra). There were more red flags than a Soviet parade but I ignored them all. Tbh I was chatting to a shed load of men, some on hookup sites and some dating sites so it's possible I wasn't paying enough attention...

Tbh I don't think anybody else would be as stupid as me except that clearly they do get results so maybe. I would just say if it looks too good to be true there's a reason for that.

more red flags than a Soviet parade 😂

Just got a msg from someone with a tongue out, sitting in his car selfie. Asked what's with the pic. Beyond caring now

Response is 'just to show there's some humour in me - life is too serious - particularly at the moment'

Oh yeah that tongue out shows how funny you are. Excuse us for being serious whilst there's thousands of people dying. Ffs

Eww at seeing a grown man’s tongue. It always put me right off.

I've been contacted by lots of 'widower scammers' on Facebook actually.
They're easy to spot.
Usually in their 50s or older (at least 14 years older than me!!), and American or Canadian.
With jobs in the US army or oil industry.
Working in dangerous places like Iraq.
Widowed, maybe with grown up kids.
A few photos, not much on their profile, no or hardly any Facebook friends.

The thing that makes it obvious is the way they write. I have quite a few actual Pakistani, Afghan, Indian friends (linked to work & groups I've joined) who talk & write English in a certain way & these 'American widows' write in an Asian English way to my mind.

I just block & ignore them.

This one was allegedly Norwegian. Fine tuning for the site I was on I think.

I only did OLD for 1 week (my friend signed me up after too much Prosecco, which is never a good start).
I obviously came across as gullible, fresh meat as got catfished twice. Both had lost their parents tragically, had no family and were from overseas and only recently moved to the UK (so loads of red flags). Yes both had hair and were among the only two on the site who didn’t look like they’d just done a 10 stretch.
Found the whole thing totally depressing. Other comments I received were “nice face”, “hi sexy” and “hello smiler”. Just wanted to rush out and buy 20 cats and I don’t even really like cats.
Also what is it with men young enough to be your son messaging? I clearly had an age range of 48-55 but got lots of messages from men in their 20’s. Final gripe is why a significant number of men in their late 40’s and 50’s only want to consider women significantly younger than them.
As a 50 year old women I seemed to have the choice of a boy the same age as my son or a man in his 70’s. Shoot me now 😩😂

"Dont take life too seriously" drives me mad! What does that mean!?
Surely taking life seriously is about getting up every day, going to work, earning your own money, paying your bills etc. Why wouldnt you want someone who did this as a basic requirement?

When I say I’m irish I can guarantee the reply is “do you have an accent?”

@Wasail yup. It must excite them or something 🤦‍♀️

The ones where they say "my kids come first so if you can't hack that then piss off". Clearly any normal person would realise that would be the case. No need to be aggressive about it

I hate the "ask me anything", not just for laziness aspect, but them not committing to a defined profile makes it easy for them to make up what they think you want to hear. HYEEEOOUUGGGE red flag, IMHO.

singlemum81 you have GOT to contact me. I want to compare notes on somebody I can almost guarantee you've spoken with.

@ErrmWTAF is it about one of the blokes with missing teeth!? Happy to chat privately

No, surprisingly, this one had teeth. But PM anyway.

A ridiculous amount of blokes near me have graduated from Harvard Law School.

Figuring out how to PM 🙈 can anyone give me instructions!!

@ErrmWTAF sent!

Surely taking life seriously is about getting up every day, going to work, earning your own money, paying your bills etc. Why wouldnt you want someone who did this as a basic requirement?

Oh, come on, you know that isn't what the expression means.

I agree its irritating to read but you know what it means.

@SunshineSmellsLikeSummer I think the phrase they are looking for is that they don’t take THEMSELVES too seriously. But off putting either way. I avoid anything suggesting someone who can’t have a serious conversation 😄

I just saw one that read like a job interview- “you will be between 5’ and 5’9”, slim, dark hair, tanned skin, enjoy playing tennis and sailing. You will have a graduate degree or higher but earn less than me” okay mate, good luck with that

@Wasail I bet that bloke wanted a woman at least 5-10 years younger too 😆

@midnightstar66 she must dress fashionably, look after herself and take pride in her appearance. He doesn't mention age, a rookie mistake.