Neighbour unhappy about kids playing basketball - how do I handle this?

[Lockdownfunk]

Occasional past poster here (NC).

Our two teens have been playing basketball during lockdown, for maybe a few hours a day tops.

One neighbour has complained about the noise via text and says another neighbour (who I don’t know) is annoyed too. They’ve said the ball ‘constantly’ hitting the backboard is intrusive and have asked me to do something about it (and have offered to help with a solution if they can).

I absolutely don’t want to be a nuisance neighbour, so would like to do something ... but what?

It’s a robust hoop (secondhand, £500+ new) but, being freestanding, does rattle around a bit when it’s hit. We have nowhere that a hoop can be fixed to a wall, which might make less noise. The only supposedly quieter model I’ve found costs £1,500 and needs concreting into the ground.

Everyone’s obviously stuck at home so we need to be considerate - but because everyone’s stuck at home, don’t people also need to make some allowance too for kids letting off steam in their gardens? A bit of daily basketball keeps the teens sane; they love it, and it’s exercise.

We’re rural, detached, spread out - not houses on top of each other - and the kids play on grass, not tarmac or concrete (so the bouncing isn’t an issue). It’s just the (clattery) backboard banging - which is pretty central to basketball. I’ve looked online and there isn’t much we can do to adapt it.

I haven’t responded to my neighbour (it’s been a few days) and feel I ought to; I’m getting quite stressed about it. The kids are on at me as I’ve asked them to pause playing for a few days while we try to figure out a compromise as a family ... but we’re getting nowhere (other than the idea of suggesting a maximum of an hour or so in an agreed time window), and today ended up full-on rowing about it.

Any ideas? Do the neighbours need to bend a bit? Or do the teens just need to stop? Thanks.

I don't think it's unreasonable AT ALL. I'm delighted your kids are outside frankly. Your neighbours are gojng to have to learn the meaning of tolerance. I would send a very beige reaponse saying "I'm sorry if our outdoor activities have bothered you and we will try to be mindful. However it is a challenge at the moment and I don't want to discourage the children from playing outside instead of watching television! If there is a particular time you would prefer us not to play please say and we will try and work around' or something/ but seriously fuck them!

So I have neighbours who have t a bonfire hobby (or several neighbours because gardens back on to us & I cant also see who is/are the culprit/s)
DIY building work
loud music which is not my taste (if I here white cliffs of dover once more I will contemplate something drastic :) )
etc etc etc
trouble is we are all trapped - some are sleeping late because of shifts or because they cant sleep, some wfh, some who don't like or understand dc. some with young db who sleep during the day etc
I think we all need to chill & understand others needs (& I wish the bonfire addicts would do it after 6pm)

I love the characterisation of these boys as if they are five years old occasionally laughing with delight at bubbles😂. And if they weren’t gently skipping and laughing in the front garden they would be inside cooking meth😊. They are nearly adults. They are making a noise that lasts hours which disturbs the neighbours. Instead of being passive aggressive why not offer to reduce the length of time the noise goes on for.

I am really shocked that so many people think asking a teenage boy to disturb the neighbours just a little less is tantamount to crushing his spirit! None uif us know what the noise is like or how annoying it is. Why is everyone so back and white about this?

Because being locked up at home is really shite for teenagers. It's so unnatural and there's no risk to them. They're staying in to protect older people so they should be cut some slack

Absolutely - but do they have do create noise for hours and hours every day when they know it’s disturbing the neighbours who are also staying inside, possibly working from home to protect people.

Can’t we all cut each other some slack. Can he boys not reduce the noise by say an hour a day as a jesters if good will? Go for a run or okay football instead.

Teaching them their right to play basketball for hours and hours every day trumps their neighbours right to peace seems such a horrible lesson. Learning to compromise, to talk to the neighbours to explain they love basketball but could reduce it a bit to help out. Is that not building character and teaching near adult men how to To function in the world?

It’s not one or he other, they can make a kind jesters to the neighbours without having to give up on their daily hours of basketball.

Bit is seems no one needs to be kind or mannerly anymore.

I think 2 hours if fine and would not be asking them what they prefer....it's normal daytime hour neighborhood noise.

People so precious. I think your neighbors are massively unreasonable

We've got two kids doing that here for hours a day. Ive said nothing as I dont think its my business to tell people how to live but Gods the constant "boc boc boc" is driving me crazy.
I've moved my bed and tv to the back of the house for some respite but its coming through all the doors.
I will probably continue to say nothing.

@saraclara yes their neighbours world has been turned upside down too, I do appreciate that. However, as adults, our capacity to understand and make adjustments and allowances is very different to that of a child would be my point.

I think something conciliatory like the note I suggested, or some agreed hours if they are working from home is reasonable. But I do believe children have different coping abilities and different needs to adults.

@Feckoffwithyourbananabread yes, different needs. Not more important needs. The neighbours are living with their own stresses, which may well, given their extra responsibilities as adults (possibly with elderly parents that they're concerned about, or health issues of their own), may well be more worrying than the teenagers'.

These posters need to get over themselves, it is just teens playing basket ball. It is not a fog horn. Leave the kids to it. The world has gone mad if your complaining about kids playing in their garden. If your neighbours are that bothered they can get ear plugs.

scottishlass123

These posters need to get over themselves “

So, you’ve just finished your 10 hour shift and desperately need some sleep before it starts all over again. You’re having trouble doing that because next door’s kids, whose parents are comfortably working from home or on furlough, are playing basketball for hours on end.

Oh, get over yourself!

@chillipeanuts get a grip

I have a very realistic grip, thank you.

My neighbours kids play basketball in their garden. We dread the summer as we know we're going to be subjected to hours of a ball being bounced on concrete quite literally thousands of times. The sound rattles through our house and there's nowhere we can get away from it.

Absolute nightmare.

My neighbours have had family round to do DIY in the garden for hours a day with power tools, most days during lockdown. I don't even know what could possibly be taking so long. Annoying, but I haven't complained.

They have complained to the council that I am allowing my children to play in the garden all day.

It's inconsiderate. Your teens need to stop or play less often.

I think given the situation we are in that a few hours in the afternoon isn’t an issue.
At this time we’re all stuck at home doing things at times we wouldn’t usually. Dogs barking during the day, neighbours doing diy and garden projects or someone working outside fixing a motorbike. I think they’re teens in need of something to do it’s not something that would annoy me at all.

Everyone is suffering at the moment. I am so glad my neighbours don’t think their teenagers making a racket in their gardens is “essential”.

Thank fuck for normal, considerate neighbours

You need to come and live next door to me, I enjoy hearing children playing. The house at the back of our garden has a swimming pool, and the children make lots of noise - it’s nice to hear them having fun - especially during these times. I think you could use the council to mediate? Say you’ve opened a case number and tell them the advice you’ve been given. I don’t think you’re doing anything wrong. You could be building an extension - that would be far more intrusive.

It's inconsiderate. Your teens need to stop or play less often.

Neighbours forcing them to stop would also be inconsiderate.

I personally can’t understand anyone telling a child to stop playing or to play less. Playing is vital to development.

When I was growing up the teenager boys across the street played basketball - it was really really loud.

Their Mum was a doctor who worked shifts and slept in the mornings, so they played late afternoon and into the evenings in the summer. I know realise their mum probably had no idea how long they played while she was at work and how loud they were😂.

We were younger and I remember my mum asking them not to play passed our bedtime. No drama, they agreed politely. Another neighbour would occassionally ask them to take a break. They always did with good humour.

Not that long ago, but in those days it was okay to ask a neighbour to be a bit considerate and in most cases the neighbour agreed.

People seem to think basketball noise is like the normal noise of children playing, it’s not. It’s loud and relentless.

I think they should be limited to 1 hour of this per day. Lots of other exercises they can do that are not so irritating to neighbours!

My DS (7) and my DH play basketball in our garden on the concrete slabs, houses are detached but gardens are practically on top of each other. The noice of the bouncing grates my nerves but they both enjoy playing, I am surprised we haven't had any complaints from neighbours yet. I have no advice but wish you good luck OP

I think 2-3 hours is fine. It’s great exercise, as long as not starting too early or too late or hitting their house.
I’d suggest ear plugs for your neighbour if it’s that much of a problem.
Our neighbour offered to stop her son playing basketball when we had a new born. I told her he could continue.