Sex

[Sianholby]

Ok, I’m not sure if I’m being unreasonable here but since lockdown, my neighbours have become....more vocal.

I live in a semi detached house, couple next door are late twenties, keep themselves to themselves and moved in about 6 months ago. We see them occasionally but never socialise.

I think they may have been furloughed as their cars haven’t moved for a good few weeks.

They are certainly making the most of the lockdown as they are having very loud sex. This is during the day, about 5 or 6 times. Now I’m no prude, but both me and my husband are trying to work from home whilst trying to look after our toddler so the screams of “Oh Adam, do it to me Adam” and the loud groaning and banging is getting a bit much! I’m sure they are having a great time but I don’t need to hear them orgasm whilst I am on a Zoom call!!! This has been going on for a while in lockdown now, we live in a two bed so space is an issue for us to work from home. And I’ve tried moving rooms but they seem to enjoy their sex sessions all over the house, multiple times a day so there’s no escape 🤣

As we don’t know them very well, how would you approach talking to them?

@SummerWhisper

The first song that popped into my head to add to your list was I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas.

I am loving all your suggestions. I didn’t think I’d get such a response! Anyway, SHOCK HORROR....she’s gone out this morning in her car. So if anyone wants to borrow Adam 🤣

Send your address....on my way 😂

Did she take a rubber ring to sit on in the car?

@SummerWhisper has compiled an excellent playlist to throw Adam off his stride.

Regardless if it’s their own house in anyway they should be considerate. My kids sometimes scream in their garden. It’s our own house, do I let them? No but we have neighbours even though we’re detached. Making loud noises beyond normal household noise is anti social.

I believe theres a song called 'i just had sex', just blast that out when they start 🤣

You have to play the same song each time, so it acts like aversion therapy

@BeingATwatItsABingThing excellent (as in most awful) suggestion!

Love the aversion therapy

I had this when my neighbours first moved in, then I realised I knew the woman from working together years previous
I could literally hear everything & he was a real talker.

She updated her Facebook status one day to 'had such a lovely day with ....' I commented saying 'I could hear 😉' she laughed about it but I rarely heard them after that.

This was about 5 years ago now and they are great neighbours now.

They probably have sex on cam for money. They need income, explains the vocal excesses and the fact that it's multiple times a day.🤷‍♀️

This is the song @Gin4thewin suggested. DH always sings it to himself afterwards...

Definitely applause when they finish and then play it very very loudly straight after clapping.

I wonder if cam sex too?
people out of work and need money

My additions to the song list:

Why Don't we Get Drunk and Screw - Jimmy Buffet
a variety of Military marching songs
Taps
Church Hymns
She'll Be Coming 'Round the Mountain

Sorry I know it must be annoying for you but it's hilarious😂😂

We were that neighbour in normal times we don’t work Fridays and we only really saw each other on Thursday and Friday, so, we always made the most of our time. We didn’t think about open windows, we know our neighbour quite well, I saw him one day and he did a very good impression of what he had heard. We now make sure to check windows!

I would download a round of applause and laughing and play it really loud every time they start

YMCA would put them off!

I used to love daytime sex pre dc but 6 times a day

Well there has been absolutely nothing today since she got back....maybe they’ve fallen out. It’s weird being so silent 😂😂😂

@sianholby maybe she's got MN 😂

Our old neighbours were the same and it was horrible, like being forced into an orgy through the wall. I'm not in voyeurism and I didn't appreciate having no choice in being a part of their sex life!

I spoke to them first in person and actually recorded the convo on my phone in case I ever needed to refer to it. When that had no impact we sent a letter mentioning if it carried on we would have to make a formal noise complaint to the council, they moved out shortly afterwards 😁

Forcing other people to listen to you fuck is beyond inconsiderate. I don't care how good Adam is in bed. He's more than likely shit anyway 😉

To add to @SummerWhisper's playlist I'd maybe play the countdown conundrum theme (full volume) when they're sounding like their about to finish 😂
Imagine having that much time on your hands to do that though! I've got two DC under two, I can't even remember the last time! 😂😂

Play the Akon song "just had sex" every time they finish.

Maybe she saw the thread, maybe he also read Take It Up The Banjo and he has scarpered!!

you need ear plugs oh and i should think sooner or later she will need some Canesten! as for him he must be taking Viagra and using cock rings or something similar def making porn i reckon

They probably have absolutely no idea that they can be heard. You need to make some noise on your side so that they get an idea of how thin the walls are.