Can I leave 'D'H to go to my parents?

[lovemenomore]

Hi all,

I need to leave my abusive husband and go to my parents with our DD?

He's more mentally abusive and emotional than physical - although he was last year. He's a very heavy drinker and he is insanely jealous and controlling.

It's a very long story to tell all on here but I need to go.

Can I go to my parents - would that be allowed considering Covid etc?!

I left and the sense of freedom and peace was incredible :)

You can go, it is an essential journey to protect yourself and child. Good luck OP, you are strong and you can do this

Yes you can and should go. If he’s drinking and falls asleep drunk, go then. Get out as soon as you can

Carry your sleeping daughter to the car and go when he passes out from the drink. Then you have a few hours to travel safely and sort things out before he notices you're not in the building.

Agree you need to wait til he is asleep and leave.
Take what you need to.

Trouble is he never passes out 'pissed' he's a high functioning alcoholic.

My parents are both fit and healthy however both in early 70's. We would be in a spare doom so not sure how easy it would be to isolate there. That's the only thing I'm
Worried about - their age?

My sisters isn't an option really as only 2bed and already got her family there.

Just go OP.

We have 1 car so it's best if my mom picks us up
Tomorrow i think or should I take the car? It's in his name etc?

OP just go. Deal with the finer details later x

Good luck. You're doing the right thing

Just take the car. Don't drag your mum out. You're married, you're allowed to drive it.

I'd wait until he's in bed then get DD up and go!

Do it it's the best thing I've ever ever done. Just please promise to post when you've arrived at your parents safely xx

@Stuckandsadintheupsidedown

I will. I have left before and it was great but he talked me round and I thought it was best thing for DD. All the promises and nothing changed. I feel a fool.

Asking to go to my parents tomorrow will be it as they won't let me go back to him.

It's absolutely allowed to leave if it's to keep you and your DD safe.
Never go back. Growing up with an alcoholic is hell.

Just make sure you stay safe while you stay at home, OP. If you need to call the police, don't hesitate.

How far away do your parents live?

@HollowTalk

About 26 miles but I'll get there, will take car.

Good luck op

A suggestion I read on another thread. Write down what is happening and why you are leaving and your parents details.. Then if you do get stopped by the police, which you might well, you can just hand them the paper rather than having to try and find the words. If this does happen they will help you.

Is he likely to sleep late tomorrow and give you the chance to get away?

Nothing to add but good luck op. I'll be rooting for you. Stay safe.

Just to add you can call the police to help you leave if necessary . Good luck op

Yeah he'll sleep in I'm just so scared of going and him creating and not letting me take DD. Last time he grabbed her off me whilst she was screaming etc. Luckily my parents were here and got her safely.

I can hear him downstairs shouting fuckin slag and laughing - mocking me.

You can do it walt until he's asleep take your DD and the car and leave. You will only regret it if you stay x

How far away are your parents? If you need to phone the police do it. They will help and in the extremely unlikely event you get unhelpful police officers you phone again.

Some excellent advice here,leave tonight when he falls asleep.

Best wishes and look forward to a much better future for you both.