Am I being taken for a fool!

[keeptakingthepills]

Agh am irritated and having to hold it in. But am also hormonal so probably irrational.
So two things this week have f**cked me off with my DP.
So DP lives with me and my kids. My home I pay the bills and mortgage, internet, tv etc. I also pay the food bills. He throws in some cash now and again for food. His kids (2DC) stay every other weekend and one night a week. I feed them and cook and tidy for them. So far happy to do so.
But he’s been short of money lately and I’m the higher earner so I said don’t worry I’ll pay the food shopping. Then he tells me he accidentally gave his ex extra money this month as maintenance and then told her don’t worry you keep it. Telling me she needs it as doesn’t earn much and struggles to make ends meet. I’m thinking..great! So I’m basically subbing your ex and paying for your kids to be fed etc while they’re with me. He keeps telling me to stop turning the thermostat down as the house is cold but jeez I’m watching the bills go thru the roof!
Second thing that annoyed me is I worked all day. Then picked his kids up from his ex on my way home and walked in. He’s having a beer. I start getting his kids dinner. He’s doing nothing. I then ask if someone could pass me some plates so I can dish up. Instead he puts them on the table. No big deal so I say sorry can you pass them to me instead so I can dish up. He makes this massive arm flourish action passing me the plates. I say sorry is this a problem for you? He says you said set the table like I was being demanding! In my head I’m thinking you I’m getting your children dinner (mine are at their dads) and you are doing nothing and I just ask for plates and you act like I’m some diva. So I said sorry if it’s too much trouble to which he mutters away under his breath something about me being tired etc.
I’m
Just venting but honestly this last couple of weeks I’m thinking actually what do you bloody bring to the relationship? Obvs you’re only getting my side. I realise I’m being a bit over the top.

What an arse! Just get his teenagers to phone their mother, or take them home yourself. Just tell them their father will explain, time to go home. Their teenagers, they can handle it.

taking the piss, not kids!

The thought of the laughing face emoji is giving me the rage!

Unbelievable.

This isn't the time for dolly steps or worrying about other's feelings or what people might think. This is an emergency - get someone there with you now for support. He's made it quite clear what he thinks of you so time for you to act pronto!

We'll done OP stay strong. He'll probably say all sorts to try and convince you that all is ok and normal. Even if it is just to squeeze a few more months of cocklodging out of you. Don't hesitate to call the police if things get nasty, even in front of the kids. Safety is more important than shielding them from uncomfortable situations.

So angry for you OP. I hope you give him a good hard kick up his lazy misogynistic arse as he leaves.

Oh silly you, objecting to being his free housekeeper/nanny/cook/cleaner/landlady! It's such a privilege and here you unappreciating the honour he has bestowed on you - despite all your hysterical ramblings.

Can I put money on him not showing up with a takeaway (that he's paid for), then putting a rocket up his kids arses and them all cracking on with tidying up after themselves?

Yes the laughing face is giving me the rage too! Really rooting (spelling?) for you!

You’re really not going to get rid of him. He doesn’t care he is very very entitled and abusive.

He has the measure of you, he knows you’ll be too scared and polite to actually throw him out.

Really, seriously, call around friends preferably big male friends to come round and back you up. Start packing his stuff in bin liners, tell the teens to call their mum and pack their stuff as they are leaving.

If you don’t, you will still be cooking, cleaning, ferrying around his kids and paying for this cocklodger and his offspring for years down the line. And they’ll all enjoy treating you like a doormat.

I bet your dc don’t like having their mum, and their home over run by all these strangers. But they, like you are trained to put everyone above their own basic needs.

If you can’t face going home because of the people staying in your home, then remedy it.

Stop being nice. Stop worrying about everyone else, when it’s you who needs to be put first.

The utter bastard! Laughing face emoji indeed. Get the kids to ring their mum and say something has come up and she needs to collect them. Phone someone (preferably male, big and scary) to have with you when he gets home. Get said scary person to tell him he has an hour to get his stuff together and get the fuck out. If said scary person can also impart to him that he'd better not show his cocklodging face near you again, that would be a bonus

The good news is OP, you CAN have your lovely home back to yourself tonight. Hold that thought and make it happen

Start packing his stuff up. Tell his DC they aren't staying at yours after all tonight so they need to pack their stuff up ready to leave.

He can go to a hotel for the night if need be!

Crossposted with frazzled

.

Not a chance would he spend another night under my roof. Arrogant bastard.

Drop the kids at their mums, bag up his stuff outside and lock up the house before he gets back.

What a monumentally entitled twat he is.

My blood is boiling on your behalf OP! I hope you have some burly friends to help throw him out. Get his bags packed

I do hope this thread is real. Often when I get invested in posts like this where the OP has been in a horrible situation for months but then posts and only 100 replies later, finds her balls and chucks him out-the thread goes poof and disappears!

Please tell us you’re real, @keeptakingthepills!

Wow, what a cunt he is.

Does the kids’ mum live far away?

Yep start getting his shit bagged up. Leave it outside. Tell his kids. Get them to call their mum.

Not your problem OP.

Hope you're ok, OP. He sounds awful - I hope he doesn't turn nasty.

Remember the mum knows he is an utter cock. She divorced him. Tell the teens dad messaged a problem so they need to call their mum. Tbh, I'd pay fir a taxi to take them home. No big drama to them, just dad has a problem meaning he won't be here tonight and off they go.

Then when they are gone get his stuff in bin bags outside the door. Maybe print out a giant laughing emoji and stick it to a bag.

Let him back through that door tonight and you'll hate yourself

York is absolutely right. Good advice.

Tork not York!

Definitely send teens home, I’m sure they have a key.
Put his stuff outside and lock door sand leave key in so he can’t get in.

Yes @fedup21 I’m sorry to say this has been my very crap week.
My kids come back Sunday and I want this done with by then. I don’t think they’ll miss him. They have me.
Him on the other hand will definitely be missing his comfortable home. He’ll only be able to afford a room in a house share. Hardly the ideal place for seeing your kids!