Has anyone ever experienced this?
I don't feel like DH is on my team at all.
- He seemingly sabotages my organisation- won't use the family calender or 'forgets' to, creating chaos when he has to work late and he's not told me in advance on my late working day and we have no childcare!
- Never seems happy for me when something goes well at work.
-Never compliments my cooking, particularly when I've made a lot of effort. But will say a wonderful a pre-cooked pie is or a shop bought cake- feel like he is doing it on purpose. I am pretty good at cooking and other family and friends will say so, but he never even musters a thank you.
-seems unhappy when I am happy, but as soon as something upsets/saddens me, becomes happy himself.
- will make me feel rubbish and inferior by always disagreeing, being overly pedantic, or saying I am wrong about some minor insignificant detail. Yesterday, it was after I kicked a football at DC1s head (instead of at the goal!) and she was crying with a big red mark on her cheek and I felt awful. I told her she had popped up from nowhere as she had been crouched down and suddenly stood up. Infront of her, DH was saying "no she wasn't at all, she was stood up the whole time." Which I felt was implying I'd aimed for her! I became obviously upset and his mood lifted (he had been grumpy all day previously) and he started calling me "sweetheart."
- He will correct me infront of friends and completely derail my story.
- Will delay bedtimes, bath times, leaving the house on time with the DCs as if subconsciously to make everything late and me anxious and irritable. He knows I hate being late and appears to go out of his way to do so. This makes him look like happy Dad and me, miserable mummy.
- I the past has kept money to himself and has complained in the past that I should not have the same amount of disposable income as him as I "only work part time" due to having pre-school DCs.
- Is only intimate on his terms, will turn me down claiming to be tired but will particularly want it if I'm tired. Also will want it if I have my pyjamas on and never if Im already naked, which I find odd!
- Ensures he has his freedom and hobbies etc but doesn't seem too bothered about me getting my free time. He will say " you know you can do what you like" but does not support me in doing so.
- He won't plan our lives with me, he won't sit and discuss finances easily.
- seems to say the opposite and do the opposite of what I say and want. I just don't feel he's on my side at all.