Dating thread 177. Drinking Prosecco on our own trying to arrange a christmas snog

[Marlboroandmalbec34]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread

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Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item

cheesecake roughly 3 and even then you may well find yourself dateless.

Just treat it all as a big game for most of the time.

Well done on the pics shitwith!

Lovely update jesuis do you hear anything from Mr Plumber? I am gonna be strong this time re Mr Big. Yes the sex is great but I really want a something with reciprocal feels

batshit sounds like a hard time for you glad you have the lovely Mr BC

pretender soooo exciting!!!

salty I bloody love you!

cheesecake I once had 6 dates with 6 irons lined up for one weekend. 4 ended up cancelling/ cancelled. I think at the chat stage as many as you want to have. When you start on the apps you will get so much interest. It does calm down but try to enjoy it and do what feels right to you.

So tempted to get back on the apps but a) I promised myself to wait till new year and b) I'm at my parents so none of the buggers would be local anyway

Marlbs 😘

Great news @JeSuisPrest I was hoping you'd tell us some of the sweet things Mr C did.. No pressure though! You just always have some nice stories

After saying that I've had no old irons contact me, Mr Art has just messaged to ask if I had a good xmas. We've kept in touch sporadically though as friends.

Mr Delts just sent me some amazing photos of his upper body. 🎇🤩

It's nice having that company @shitwithsugaron even a FWB.

I need to read back and find out what's been happening. But first a quick update about Mr FO.
He sent a very bland good morning message. So I decided to tell him how shit he has made me feel over the last couple of days. I was polite and explained how he'd made me feel by not replying and then not explaining why he was ignoring me.

He apologised profusely. Told me what he'd been doing and why he didn't reply. Apologised again and promised he would make it up to me.
So far today, he has kept in touch a lot more. We've had a proper chat. All is ok again.

I'm not making excuse but he's had a really crap year. I only found out exactly what happened recently and it explains why he's pushed me away twice. He went to stay with family for Christmas to get away from everything that has happened and to de-stress. He knows he should've made more effort to keep in touch with me.
And he knows that if he does anything like that again, he won't get another chance.

Way to go @EchoElephant

Go @shitwithsugaron! Keep us in the Bumble loop!

@PerfectPretender Enjoy having him here. MrNN is back in the UK tomorrow, I have to wait until Monday to see him so that MiniSJT has two normal days at home after we’ve been away for xmas. They’re going to drag, you’re a hero for going 8 weeks.

@JeSuisPrest Lovely update as always.

@KeepCalmCarryOhFuckIt I tend to get friends who go away on holiday to get it, especially eastern europe as it’s really cheap, you can order online as well though.

Random q. If you have a fwb do you ever meet them and spend time with them without the benefits 😂

@Jane1978xx To me that's dating but I don't really understand the whole FWB thing anyway.

@Jane1978xx FWB and I met up a few times with the intention of just getting food but without fail every time we had sex 😂

It depends if they’re a friend with benefits or fuck buddy. Mine was a friend with benefits, so we still did normal friends stuff together, but we’re exs and best mates, so we obviously like complicated things 😂 For us our friendship would carry on as normal when the benefits ended (and it has), so we didn’t see the need to change that when there were benefits.

It doesn’t matter if other people do, it’s what your expectations/needs are.

@Sunshineandflipflops I don’t understand it either and I’m trying to make sense of my own situation 🤦‍♀️ But maybe I’m over thinking and I don’t need to.

Go @shitwithsugaron!

@jane i rarely have the F without some form of B but it could just be kissing etc

Ultimately its up to the couple to decide. My FWBs are also always exclusive too, something else which has prompted much debate on here

I think I am over thinking and it’s early days in terms of time ill see what happens in this next month. It was never this complicated 15 years ago I’m sure 😂

@saltysally I gave him a list of about 6 things I'd like and said pick one and get me a box of my favourite chocs. That will be enough. I got everything on my list along with a card which made me cry when I read it. I'd got him a jokey one with cartoon sloths on the front of it! Whhhhhyyyyy the fuck did I do that??? I managed to leave his main present at home but he wasn't bothered and said he had everything he needed as I was there with him. He waited on me hand and foot (as usual) and most importantly didn't make DD feel like she was a spare part who he had to put up with - the 7am wake up call on Christmas morning was a bit of a shock to him though 🤭. Its always been a bit of a worry to me that whilst he may be happy with the me and him side of the relationship, he's never been in a LTR or had kids (or been with anyone that has kids), so it's new territory to him. By 9am he'd fixed a broken yoyo, built a dolly bed and had a game of Pictionary Air. He's very domesticated and cooked every meal/cleared up/kept the house in ship shape fashion and was chief wrapping paper tidier upper/bin bag handler on Christmas morning. His family came over on Boxing Day for food and drinks and they are great. They've had a really rough 18 months with their mum passing away very unexpectedly in an accident, so there were some tears because MrC lives at the family home still and it holds a lot of memories for them. I'd put the tree and decs up this year and they all said she would have loved it. It makes me sad that I'll never get to meet her, she sounds like an amazing woman. Just like her son. He's got a big birthday coming up in Feb so we're planning a few days away - somewhere we can take the dogs for lovely long walks along the beach, curl up on the sofa next to a roaring fire and share a bottle of wine.

@Marlboroandmalbec34 Yes MrPlumber still contacts me and we chat about life - he's seeing someone now and I'm really pleased for him, he deserves someone lovely in his life - the timing just wasn't right for us back in March with his living situation and working away/studying for which I am now very thankful as MrC is a much better fit for me in every way - always handy to know a plumber anyway, though MrC is pretty practical and can turn his hand to most things - except watching Call the Midwife which he huffed his way through 😂🤷‍♀️

@EchoElephant Well done 👍🏻

I don’t get the FWB thing, surely if your doing things together, going out together, exclusive and having sex you are in a relationship?

I have had FB ,people I see once a month for a shag, maybe we chat a bit but we don’t go out together.