He hasn't spoke ...would yo bother texting him?

[sunshineonarsinyday]

Guy I'm seeing it's always on his terms.
When he wants to chat I drop everything and I'm there.
Last week he was really chatty this week it's like I'm constantly chasing him to talk.
Today he didn't say a word so I text him at 4pm and he gave me two word replies so I jokingly said "ha ha man of many words"
He replied ..my battery is really low and work is manic ..
I replied .."oh no hope it flys over "
He read and didn't reply
(Has been on WhatsApp all the time so clearly not that manic )
What was his excuse yesterday and Monday.
Basically it's me most of the time initiating conversation
He finishes work at 7
Would you text again later ?
Or wait for him to text me now?

@chemicalworld I know he is but a quick text texts a few seconds to let me know he is thinking of me

Jesus Christ people this is ridiculous
OP your fears are YOURS not because of his behaviour. He isn't causing this. You need to work on your own self esteem and value yourself outside of whether he's texting you or not.

Maybe he's not thinking about you. He doesn't have to be thinking about you 24/7

He has other priorities such as work and his kids, you are clearly way down on the list. Why are you so obsessed with him? It sounds as if you have an empty life and don't value yourself. You also sound needy and immature. Focus on building yourself up and your own life and friendships OP

I agree with @CodenameVillanelle

You are sounding harder work with every update. Your irrational behaviour will drive him away.

Why do you think you are so needy for validation? Maybe worth seeking counselling

"I know he is but a quick text texts a few seconds to let me know he is thinking of me'
That's the point. He isn't thinking of you.

If you didn't question anything for him to screenshot that his battery was low then maybe he has been in a relationship in the past where he is used to being questioned. He got in first to prove himself. Either way, it doesn't sound like healthy behaviour. If you continue and form a proper relationship, will you be expected to provide proof that what you say is true?

Why did he say he split with the mother of his children?

I'd say definitely worth seeking counselling. OP, I used to feel like you, I'd be stressed an anxious about men all the time and I thought my way of thinking/feeling was correct. I had a shit ton of counselling and am now very different, I really would recommend it and finding your self worth. Look at what is going on in your life, if you are bored, unfulfilled try and think of new things to do. Go make yourself happy.

This is the thing if he doesn't text and I see his on WhatsApp I start feeling so worried thinking
Who's he talking too
Why isn't he messaging me
He prefers talking to someone other than me.
I know it's my issue
Should I tell him how I feel? Then maybe he will understand why I get so worried and anxious

@sunshineonarsinyday he's probably talking to his friends. Or maybe even leaving the app open even though his phone is locked.

Are you exclusive?

I think you need to stop posting constant threads over and over and use the time to get some help for you. This isn't normal behaviour, you need to stop dating until you're capable of being in an adult relationship, maybe some counselling will help?

No @sunshineonarsinyday dont tell him all of that, I am normally all for the honesty but after 8(?) dates that is really far too intense imo. This is your issue to manage not his.

You need to stop fixating on the subtext of his WhatsApp/texting behaviours and either start enjoying the early days of dating or be single for a while to work on you and your confidence. I appreciate you have been ghosted before but that isn't this guy's fault.

You are at risk of suffocating and alienating him. I dated someone who constantly pestered via text once. I felt like I was under police surveillance. Not fun.

Step back from the situation and give yourself some space.

You aren;t listening to anything anyone is saying.

I am listening
I haven't text him for 2 hours and the last text was from him.
I won't text him any more until he next messages me.

What do you do with your days?

I haven't really got a lot going on at the minute
I have a lot of time to think

I have deja vu...

At first he used to snapchat me lots through the day now he doesn't really send me any but he will text instead
Do you think that means anything ?

And didn't you get together by being the OW?

I think you're a troll now.

In the kindest possible way posters need to stop engaging with this thread. The OP is caught in a compulsive spiral where she is seeking reassurance over and over which is in fact feeding the compulsion.

OP this relationship isn't likely to last very long if you don't go and get some psychological help for your low self esteem and compulsive behaviour.

@sunshineonarsinyday did you post about him weeks ago under a different name?

@JorisBonson I've never been the other woman no

I am cringing for you OP. He has a life apart of you so should you . You will drive yourself crazy and drive him away in the process. RELAX I know it's hard when you like someone

At first he used to snapchat me lots through the day now he doesn't really send me any but he will text instead
Do you think that means anything ?

Christ is this what dating is like now? OP in the nicest possible way, you need to stand down from WhatsApp Watch and SnapChat Surveillance. This guy might be a complete dick or he might be lovely, I don't know. But if you carry on like this, you won't know either because he won't stick around! Relax a bit!!!

I don't think he will think I'm needy will he?
If I haven't said anything yet to him
I'm going to work on this
I don't want to push him away