I want kids she absolutely done not.

[Angeles99]

Hello, I'm 22 years old and my girlfriend of 3 years is 23. We have discussed wanting kids and everytime we do she is dead set on not having any. The way she speaks about not wanting to go through the pain and having to raise a living thing because as she says she is selfish and Does not want to share attention or spend money on anyone that isnt herself.

every time we have this conversation I say I do want kids but then later in the argument say I dont just so we stop arguing.

Adoption isnt a option either for her, even with pets she does not want any because she doesnt wanna be responsible and have to take care of it and buy it things.

She even tells me she doesn't really want to have sex because she thinks I might want to purposely get her pregnant. Even though I want kids I would not do this.

But in reality, I do want kids. I love her and we are discussing moving in by the end if this year. I've read things that point to the partner that wants kids will resent to the other that does not. Is it true? What is the best approach to this?

Indeed, @category12. It's all very well to desperately want children at 22, if you are the person going through pregnancy, birth and recovery, and the person whose career is statistically far more likely to suffer from maternity leaves, and if the other person involved is equally enthusiastic and committed to parenting along with you. But you're not. You're trying to pressure a woman who doesn't want to into taking all these risks because you want her to. Not OK.

There is nothing whatsoever 'selfish' at any age about not wanting to have a child.

And seriously, with the comment about adoption? Like she just doesn't want to be pregant, but she'd be fine with being handed a child to bring up? You clearly don't know the first thing about adoption, and you would be weeded out at the first stage.